Fully Engaged With My Family | TBN

Fully Engaged With My Family

Watch Fully Engaged With My Family
December 30, 2019
27:30

Turning Point with Dr. David Jeremiah

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Fully Engaged With My Family

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  • male announcer: Passionate, courageous, bold, resolute.
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  • All around us, people live fully engaged.
  • 00:00:12.040 --> 00:00:16.100
  • We witness in real time as athletes push the boundaries
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  • of their physical ability,
  • 00:00:19.180 --> 00:00:22.230
  • entrepreneurs drive industry forward,
  • 00:00:22.240 --> 00:00:26.060
  • and creatives explore the potentials of art
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  • and performance.
  • 00:00:29.130 --> 00:00:32.020
  • Ours is a life best lived fully engaged,
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  • but what if we did the same with our faith?
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  • What if we took our faith to more
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  • than we thought it could be,
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  • if we, as believers, lived fully engaged?
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  • Be undeniably dedicated, utterly committed.
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  • Even you might be surprised by who you can be
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  • through the power of God.
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  • You are unlimited and you are fully engaged.
  • 00:01:01.140 --> 00:01:06.120
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  • announcer: And now here's your host,
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  • Dr. David Jeremiah.
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  • Dr. David Jeremiah: Susanna Wesley, the mother of John
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  • and Charles Wesley, gave birth to 19 children.
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  • And to find a moment's peace, she would sit in a chair
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  • and cover her head with her apron.
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  • With a house full of active children,
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  • the Wesley family must have definitely been hectic.
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  • But more importantly, their story tells us
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  • that they were fully engaged with one another.
  • 00:01:38.050 --> 00:01:42.030
  • Somebody once said that whether you have one child or a dozen,
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  • family takes everything you have.
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  • But being busy is not the same as being totally committed,
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  • that is, being personally and fully involved
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  • in each other's lives.
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  • Families that work, play, talk, hug, and pray together,
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  • are families that are blessed together.
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  • God wants us to be just as closely engaged
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  • with our families as we are with him
  • 00:02:07.170 --> 00:02:10.220
  • and that's why I've titled today's message
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  • "Fully Engaged With My Family."
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  • So, please join me
  • 00:02:17.030 --> 00:02:18.160
  • for today's edition of "Turning Point."
  • 00:02:18.170 --> 00:02:20.170
  • 00:02:21.060 --> 00:02:27.050
  • female announcer: As you look out to the year ahead,
  • 00:02:27.060 --> 00:02:29.100
  • would you like to bring God more into focus?
  • 00:02:29.110 --> 00:02:32.010
  • Do you want to see him in new ways
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  • and set your eyes on the Savior?
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  • If you consistently gaze upon God and his Word
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  • like a light guiding your way,
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  • when you look back a year from now,
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  • you'll have a new perspective and clarity
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  • that only God can offer.
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  • Let David Jeremiah help you fix your eyes on God
  • 00:02:48.040 --> 00:02:51.040
  • with "Daily In His Presence,"
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  • a new 365-day devotional for 2020.
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  • Each day's short reading in this beautiful leather-bound
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  • devotional provides Scripture and a spiritual thought
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  • to encourage you, challenge you,
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  • and focus your attention on God
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  • so you can see him more clearly and observe God's will
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  • in your life, the ideal companion to your Bible study.
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  • in the new year.
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  • Support the ministry of Turning Point
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  • and Dr. Jeremiah will send you, in appreciation,
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  • "Daily In His Presence."
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  • Contact "Turning Point" today.
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  • Dr. Jeremiah: I read about a man who said
  • 00:03:57.200 --> 00:03:58.290
  • that before he got married,
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  • he had six theories about raising children.
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  • He says, "Now I have six children,
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  • I don't have any theories."
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  • I'm sure you've heard about Mark Twain succinct advice
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  • about raising children.
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  • He said, "Things run along pretty smoothly
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  • till your kid reaches 13,
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  • that's the time you need to stick them in a barrel,
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  • hammer the lid down nice and snug,
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  • and feed him through a knothole."
  • 00:04:19.210 --> 00:04:22.210
  • And he said when he turned 16, plug up the knothole.
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  • No, I don't think--if there ever was a time
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  • when we needed some encouragement
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  • and instruction on this part of family life,
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  • this is it.
  • 00:04:37.160 --> 00:04:38.280
  • But let's be honest, parenting is tough.
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  • I have four children, and 12 grandchildren
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  • in all stages of ages.
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  • And we still have some toddlers that come to our house,
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  • and we have a big box there with blocks in it.
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  • Donna has it all set up so when they come.
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  • And when one of them comes, it's peaceful.
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  • When two of them comes, it's really interesting.
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  • I called Jennifer this week and I told her I said,
  • 00:05:04.120 --> 00:05:06.100
  • "I found this, I think you should hear this
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  • and you tell me if it's true."
  • 00:05:08.190 --> 00:05:10.040
  • And she was laughing all the way through it.
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  • These are the property laws of a toddler,
  • 00:05:12.030 --> 00:05:16.040
  • the property laws of a toddler.
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  • "If I like it, it's mine. If it's in my hand, it's mine.
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  • If you take it from me, it's mine.
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  • If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
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  • If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
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  • If I'm doing or building something,
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  • all the pieces are mine.
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  • If it looks just like mine, it's mine.
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  • If I saw it first, it's mine.
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  • If you are playing with something and you put it down,
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  • it automatically becomes mine.
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  • If it's broken, it's yours," the property laws of a toddler.
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  • Well, the Bible tells us in Ephesians 6,
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  • "Children, obey your parents in the Lord,
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  • for this is right.
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  • Honor your father and mother,
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  • which is the first commandment with promise:
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  • that it may be well with you and you may live long
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  • on the earth.
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  • And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath,
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  • but bring them up in the training
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  • and admonition of the Lord."
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  • If you read the Book of Ephesians,
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  • you will discover quite quickly
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  • that this passage is at the end of a section of Scripture
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  • where Paul is teaching the believers how to live
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  • by being filled with the Holy Spirit,
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  • that means being controlled by the Holy Spirit.
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  • Let me just lay this down as a principle.
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  • If we're gonna have families that honor the Lord,
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  • it's gonna take more than we have to offer.
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  • It's gonna take the Holy Spirit working through us.
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  • And the interesting thing about it
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  • is that the Bible teaches that one of the results
  • 00:06:48.040 --> 00:06:51.020
  • of being filled with the Holy Spirit
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  • is that we will be submitting one to another.
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  • And the Bible says, wives submit to their husbands
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  • and husbands are loving their wives,
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  • and children are obeying their parents,
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  • and parents are bringing oversight to their children.
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  • The Bible says that
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  • when we are controlled by the Holy Spirit,
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  • it affects how we live our lives at home.
  • 00:07:11.230 --> 00:07:16.120
  • And I'm here to tell you
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  • that if you're gonna be a Christian at home,
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  • it's gonna take you and the Holy Spirit working together
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  • because none of us has the creative power and energy
  • 00:07:22.260 --> 00:07:28.070
  • to do what needs to be done on our own.
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  • The Book of Ephesians, in the 6th chapter,
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  • begins by speaking to us concerning obedience.
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  • "Children, obey your parents in the Lord."
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  • I read about a father who won a toy at an office game.
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  • He called his three kids together
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  • to ask which one should have the present.
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  • "Who is the most obedient?" He asked.
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  • And the children all stared back at him in silence.
  • 00:07:55.130 --> 00:07:58.070
  • Then he said, "Who never talks back to mother?"
  • 00:07:58.080 --> 00:08:02.000
  • Again, the kids appear to be mystified
  • 00:08:02.010 --> 00:08:03.230
  • by the question.
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  • Then the father said,
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  • "Who does everything she says?"
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  • With that question, the kids were finally able
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  • to come to a conclusion the three small voices
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  • answered in unison, "Okay Dad, you get the toy."
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  • Obedience is the fundamental building block of the home.
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  • Whether there are Christians in that home or not,
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  • obedience is what makes a family work.
  • 00:08:25.280 --> 00:08:28.100
  • In fact, there are two remarkable passages
  • 00:08:28.110 --> 00:08:30.230
  • in the Word of God that help us to understand
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  • that obedience in the home is at the center of our society.
  • 00:08:33.180 --> 00:08:38.160
  • In the Book of Romans in the first chapter,
  • 00:08:38.170 --> 00:08:41.170
  • Paul is describing a culture that has come unglued
  • 00:08:41.180 --> 00:08:45.160
  • to the point where the Bible says God gives this culture up.
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  • And he gives us a list of characteristics
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  • of that culture, guess what's on the list.
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  • Disobedient to parents.
  • 00:08:55.160 --> 00:08:58.260
  • When you get to the Book of 2 Timothy chapter 3,
  • 00:08:58.270 --> 00:09:02.040
  • Paul is writing to Timothy
  • 00:09:02.050 --> 00:09:03.190
  • and he's describing the culture
  • 00:09:03.200 --> 00:09:05.020
  • that's gonna be on this earth when Jesus comes back
  • 00:09:05.030 --> 00:09:08.050
  • to take us to heaven.
  • 00:09:08.060 --> 00:09:10.100
  • And then again, there's a whole list of characteristics
  • 00:09:10.110 --> 00:09:12.100
  • of what the world is gonna be like
  • 00:09:12.110 --> 00:09:13.240
  • when Jesus comes back.
  • 00:09:13.250 --> 00:09:15.040
  • Guess what's on the list.
  • 00:09:15.050 --> 00:09:17.020
  • Disobedience to parents.
  • 00:09:17.030 --> 00:09:20.150
  • Sometimes, we need to just remember
  • 00:09:20.160 --> 00:09:23.180
  • that what we do in our own home
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  • is creating the society in which we live.
  • 00:09:25.280 --> 00:09:29.060
  • Society is made up of many families.
  • 00:09:29.070 --> 00:09:31.220
  • And the Bible gives us some instruction
  • 00:09:31.230 --> 00:09:33.220
  • to hold our families together
  • 00:09:33.230 --> 00:09:36.000
  • that becomes the glue that holds society together.
  • 00:09:36.010 --> 00:09:40.140
  • In this passage of Scripture, Paul gives us four reasons
  • 00:09:40.150 --> 00:09:43.060
  • why children should obey their parents.
  • 00:09:43.070 --> 00:09:45.240
  • The first reason is because it's a principle of morality.
  • 00:09:45.250 --> 00:09:50.000
  • "Children, obey your parents in the Lord."
  • 00:09:50.010 --> 00:09:51.180
  • Now, watch this, "For this is right."
  • 00:09:51.190 --> 00:09:55.100
  • Colossians 3:20 says, "Children, obey your parents
  • 00:09:55.110 --> 00:09:58.290
  • in all things. For this is well pleasing to the Lord."
  • 00:09:59.000 --> 00:10:06.070
  • Do you want to please the Lord?
  • 00:10:06.080 --> 00:10:08.120
  • Then do what is right.
  • 00:10:08.130 --> 00:10:10.100
  • If you want honor the Lord who formed you,
  • 00:10:10.110 --> 00:10:12.080
  • and gave you life,
  • 00:10:12.090 --> 00:10:13.180
  • and who sent his only Son into this world for your salvation,
  • 00:10:13.190 --> 00:10:16.140
  • then why don't you just do what is right?
  • 00:10:16.150 --> 00:10:20.070
  • "Children, obey your parents in the Lord.
  • 00:10:20.080 --> 00:10:22.020
  • For this is right."
  • 00:10:22.030 --> 00:10:24.040
  • Number two, we should obey our parents
  • 00:10:24.050 --> 00:10:27.080
  • because it has a promise associated with it.
  • 00:10:27.090 --> 00:10:31.190
  • Ephesians 6:2 says, "Honor your father and mother,
  • 00:10:31.200 --> 00:10:33.250
  • which is the first commandment with promise."
  • 00:10:33.260 --> 00:10:37.210
  • And it goes back to Exodus chapter 20
  • 00:10:37.220 --> 00:10:39.200
  • where we have the Ten Commandments,
  • 00:10:39.210 --> 00:10:41.170
  • and the commandment in verse 12 is,
  • 00:10:41.180 --> 00:10:43.200
  • "Honor your father and your mother,
  • 00:10:43.210 --> 00:10:45.160
  • that your days may be long upon the land,
  • 00:10:45.170 --> 00:10:48.010
  • which the Lord your God is giving you."
  • 00:10:48.020 --> 00:10:51.210
  • Now, if you go back and look at the Ten Commandments
  • 00:10:51.220 --> 00:10:53.150
  • in Exodus chapter 20,
  • 00:10:53.160 --> 00:10:55.010
  • what you'll discover is God had given Moses
  • 00:10:55.020 --> 00:10:57.030
  • four commandments up to this point,
  • 00:10:57.040 --> 00:10:59.000
  • and there was no promise attached to any of them.
  • 00:10:59.010 --> 00:11:01.190
  • But then we come to this fifth commandment,
  • 00:11:01.200 --> 00:11:04.060
  • something changes.
  • 00:11:04.070 --> 00:11:05.280
  • Why the promise?
  • 00:11:05.290 --> 00:11:08.010
  • I don't know the answer to that except,
  • 00:11:08.020 --> 00:11:10.210
  • for no other reason, I believe it is the evidence
  • 00:11:10.220 --> 00:11:13.000
  • that God has placed great priority on this instruction.
  • 00:11:13.010 --> 00:11:17.050
  • "Children, obey your parents in the Lord,
  • 00:11:17.060 --> 00:11:20.000
  • and Honor your father and mother
  • 00:11:20.010 --> 00:11:22.220
  • so that you may live long upon the land,
  • 00:11:22.230 --> 00:11:25.130
  • which the Lord your God has given you."
  • 00:11:25.140 --> 00:11:28.090
  • We are to obey our parents in this culture
  • 00:11:28.100 --> 00:11:31.190
  • because this is God's design.
  • 00:11:31.200 --> 00:11:34.020
  • And God says that somewhere down the road,
  • 00:11:34.030 --> 00:11:36.120
  • we will look back and be glad that we did.
  • 00:11:36.130 --> 00:11:40.190
  • Even though we might struggle with it now,
  • 00:11:40.200 --> 00:11:42.240
  • struggling with obedience to parents
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  • is part of the unhooking process
  • 00:11:44.170 --> 00:11:46.280
  • that we go through as we get older.
  • 00:11:46.290 --> 00:11:49.280
  • But if we try to push that process ahead of schedule,
  • 00:11:49.290 --> 00:11:53.280
  • it will cause great damage to us and to our families.
  • 00:11:53.290 --> 00:11:58.110
  • Number three, the Bible tells us
  • 00:11:58.120 --> 00:11:59.270
  • that we are to obey our parents
  • 00:11:59.280 --> 00:12:01.100
  • because it provides protection from harm.
  • 00:12:01.110 --> 00:12:05.110
  • "Children, obey your parents in the Lord," and it says verse 3,
  • 00:12:05.120 --> 00:12:08.060
  • "that it may be well with you."
  • 00:12:08.070 --> 00:12:11.260
  • You see, in life, the principle of service, and working,
  • 00:12:11.270 --> 00:12:15.250
  • and being submissive to people who are over you,
  • 00:12:15.260 --> 00:12:18.280
  • is a building process.
  • 00:12:18.290 --> 00:12:20.290
  • If you cannot understand what it means to report to someone,
  • 00:12:21.000 --> 00:12:25.190
  • you have no right for anybody to report to you.
  • 00:12:25.200 --> 00:12:29.200
  • Authority is learned in the family,
  • 00:12:29.210 --> 00:12:31.230
  • it's learned in the home.
  • 00:12:31.240 --> 00:12:33.190
  • The Bible says that if we obey our parents,
  • 00:12:33.200 --> 00:12:38.220
  • it will be well with us.
  • 00:12:38.230 --> 00:12:41.110
  • Here's the fourth reason, because it promotes long life.
  • 00:12:41.120 --> 00:12:44.200
  • Now, I know everybody's got their ears perked here
  • 00:12:44.210 --> 00:12:47.050
  • because everybody wants a long life,
  • 00:12:47.060 --> 00:12:49.180
  • "That you may live long on the earth."
  • 00:12:49.190 --> 00:12:53.210
  • Obedient children in the Old Testament did live longer,
  • 00:12:53.220 --> 00:12:57.050
  • and discipline in a child's life is usually conducive
  • 00:12:57.060 --> 00:13:00.110
  • to good health.
  • 00:13:00.120 --> 00:13:02.180
  • People who follow God's instructions
  • 00:13:02.190 --> 00:13:04.180
  • have a much better chance of living a reasonably good life
  • 00:13:04.190 --> 00:13:08.160
  • for a reasonably long period of time.
  • 00:13:08.170 --> 00:13:10.270
  • I recommend you follow this principle,
  • 00:13:10.280 --> 00:13:16.110
  • fully engaged obedience.
  • 00:13:16.120 --> 00:13:17.270
  • Did you get all those reasons, all in those few verses?
  • 00:13:17.280 --> 00:13:20.210
  • Why should children obey their parents?
  • 00:13:20.220 --> 00:13:22.120
  • Well, there's four good reasons.
  • 00:13:22.130 --> 00:13:25.160
  • But in verse 4, the subjects change
  • 00:13:25.170 --> 00:13:28.160
  • and now the instruction is given to the parents.
  • 00:13:28.170 --> 00:13:31.170
  • So, verse 4 is fully engaged oversight.
  • 00:13:31.180 --> 00:13:35.070
  • This section of Scripture is written to parents.
  • 00:13:35.080 --> 00:13:38.190
  • Now, I know that the word "father" is in here,
  • 00:13:38.200 --> 00:13:41.190
  • so sometimes wives use this passage of Scripture
  • 00:13:41.200 --> 00:13:45.060
  • to say, "Whoa, I'm off the hook.
  • 00:13:45.070 --> 00:13:48.170
  • This is for fathers."
  • 00:13:48.180 --> 00:13:51.060
  • But I want to put you back on the hook, women,
  • 00:13:51.070 --> 00:13:54.260
  • because here's what I learned,
  • 00:13:54.270 --> 00:13:58.120
  • the word that is translated fathers in Ephesians 6:4
  • 00:13:58.130 --> 00:14:03.130
  • is the exact same word that is found in Hebrews 11:23
  • 00:14:03.140 --> 00:14:07.050
  • where we read these words,
  • 00:14:07.060 --> 00:14:08.270
  • "By faith Moses, when he was born,
  • 00:14:08.280 --> 00:14:11.040
  • was hidden three months by his parents."
  • 00:14:11.050 --> 00:14:15.280
  • So, the instruction to fathers
  • 00:14:15.290 --> 00:14:17.150
  • is really instruction to parents,
  • 00:14:17.160 --> 00:14:20.080
  • and there are some principles that we can find this
  • 00:14:20.090 --> 00:14:22.160
  • in one verse of Scripture that would transform our homes
  • 00:14:22.170 --> 00:14:25.130
  • if we would just follow them.
  • 00:14:25.140 --> 00:14:27.180
  • And grandparents, these are wonderful things
  • 00:14:27.190 --> 00:14:29.230
  • to share with your children
  • 00:14:29.240 --> 00:14:31.130
  • at the right time in the right moment,
  • 00:14:31.140 --> 00:14:33.240
  • maybe when they've asked the question.
  • 00:14:33.250 --> 00:14:36.200
  • The first principle that comes out of this verse
  • 00:14:36.210 --> 00:14:38.180
  • is the principle of discouragement.
  • 00:14:38.190 --> 00:14:41.130
  • And you fathers, you parents, do not provoke
  • 00:14:41.140 --> 00:14:46.100
  • your children to wrath.
  • 00:14:46.110 --> 00:14:49.120
  • This is the only negative principle you will find
  • 00:14:49.130 --> 00:14:51.230
  • in these four verses.
  • 00:14:51.240 --> 00:14:54.190
  • Let me tell you something I've learned.
  • 00:14:54.200 --> 00:14:57.080
  • For every time you have to say no, I hope you've worked hard
  • 00:14:57.090 --> 00:15:01.090
  • to say yes eight or nine times.
  • 00:15:01.100 --> 00:15:04.040
  • No in the context of yeses is far more powerful.
  • 00:15:04.050 --> 00:15:08.130
  • No in the context of noes almost has no meaning.
  • 00:15:08.140 --> 00:15:14.110
  • Kids today need cheerleaders more than they need critics.
  • 00:15:14.120 --> 00:15:17.290
  • We're pretty good at criticism, a lot of us,
  • 00:15:18.000 --> 00:15:19.230
  • and not so good at being cheerleaders.
  • 00:15:19.240 --> 00:15:22.150
  • It's a reversal of the way the world teaches,
  • 00:15:22.160 --> 00:15:25.070
  • but this is God's way.
  • 00:15:25.080 --> 00:15:28.000
  • God is the one who said, of his own Son Jesus Christ
  • 00:15:28.010 --> 00:15:30.180
  • at the moment of his baptism,
  • 00:15:30.190 --> 00:15:31.290
  • "This is my beloved Son in whom I am well pleased."
  • 00:15:32.000 --> 00:15:37.170
  • When was the last time that message came
  • 00:15:37.180 --> 00:15:40.050
  • from your parental mouth?
  • 00:15:40.060 --> 00:15:43.270
  • Don't discourage your children.
  • 00:15:43.280 --> 00:15:45.150
  • Next, the principle of diligence.
  • 00:15:45.160 --> 00:15:46.290
  • The Bible says, "But bring them up."
  • 00:15:47.000 --> 00:15:49.250
  • To bring up children is a scriptural phrase
  • 00:15:49.260 --> 00:15:51.260
  • that means to help them morally, mentally, and physically
  • 00:15:51.270 --> 00:15:56.100
  • become who they should be.
  • 00:15:56.110 --> 00:15:58.220
  • Parents are to be proactive in trying
  • 00:15:58.230 --> 00:16:01.160
  • to help their children develop the right principles,
  • 00:16:01.170 --> 00:16:07.020
  • the principle of diligence,
  • 00:16:07.030 --> 00:16:08.120
  • and then there's the principle of discipline.
  • 00:16:08.130 --> 00:16:12.060
  • "Bring them up in the training of the Lord,"
  • 00:16:12.070 --> 00:16:14.230
  • says the Scripture.
  • 00:16:14.240 --> 00:16:17.260
  • In the Old King James, the word here is nurture,
  • 00:16:17.270 --> 00:16:21.050
  • which means to train or develop.
  • 00:16:21.060 --> 00:16:24.050
  • Hebrews 12:6 says, "For whom the Lord loves, he chastens,
  • 00:16:24.060 --> 00:16:29.000
  • and scourges every son whom He receives."
  • 00:16:29.010 --> 00:16:33.120
  • Discipline is a basic principle of life that's being lost
  • 00:16:33.130 --> 00:16:37.120
  • in the culture of our families today.
  • 00:16:37.130 --> 00:16:40.190
  • The government says you can't touch your child,
  • 00:16:40.200 --> 00:16:44.030
  • your kids know that rule better than you do.
  • 00:16:44.040 --> 00:16:48.250
  • But listen to Proverbs, "My son, do not despise the chastening
  • 00:16:48.260 --> 00:16:53.060
  • of the Lord, nor detest His correction;
  • 00:16:53.070 --> 00:16:57.130
  • for whom the Lord loves He chastens,
  • 00:16:57.140 --> 00:17:01.160
  • just as a father the son in whom he delights."
  • 00:17:01.170 --> 00:17:06.090
  • If you never discipline them, if you never tell them no,
  • 00:17:06.100 --> 00:17:08.270
  • if you always say yes to whatever they want to do,
  • 00:17:08.280 --> 00:17:11.000
  • no matter how frivolous it may be,
  • 00:17:11.010 --> 00:17:13.130
  • what you're saying to your kids is you really don't care,
  • 00:17:13.140 --> 00:17:16.170
  • they can just go do their own thing.
  • 00:17:16.180 --> 00:17:18.270
  • Now, there are dozens of verses on discipline
  • 00:17:18.280 --> 00:17:21.170
  • in the Book of Proverbs,
  • 00:17:21.180 --> 00:17:22.280
  • and I could take you through all of them,
  • 00:17:22.290 --> 00:17:24.090
  • but you wouldn't remember them.
  • 00:17:24.100 --> 00:17:25.190
  • There's just so many of them.
  • 00:17:25.200 --> 00:17:26.290
  • So, I just want to tell you two things
  • 00:17:27.000 --> 00:17:28.140
  • about discipline that I've learned from study
  • 00:17:28.150 --> 00:17:31.210
  • and from experience.
  • 00:17:31.220 --> 00:17:33.100
  • Number one, discipline for disobedience,
  • 00:17:33.110 --> 00:17:37.010
  • not for mistakes.
  • 00:17:37.020 --> 00:17:39.260
  • Kids are gonna do what kids do,
  • 00:17:39.270 --> 00:17:42.040
  • and they should never be punished for a mistake.
  • 00:17:42.050 --> 00:17:46.190
  • Save the punishment for rebellion and disobedient,
  • 00:17:46.200 --> 00:17:51.000
  • but don't use it up on silly mistakes.
  • 00:17:51.010 --> 00:17:53.100
  • You know why we do that?
  • 00:17:53.110 --> 00:17:54.210
  • Because it irritates us and when we get irritated,
  • 00:17:54.220 --> 00:17:57.030
  • we want to irritate somebody else.
  • 00:17:57.040 --> 00:18:00.060
  • Discipline for disobedience, and never for mistakes.
  • 00:18:00.070 --> 00:18:03.230
  • And the second principle is important as the first,
  • 00:18:03.240 --> 00:18:07.230
  • discipline for an individual act,
  • 00:18:07.240 --> 00:18:10.170
  • never has an attack on a child's character.
  • 00:18:10.180 --> 00:18:15.140
  • Here's what I mean.
  • 00:18:15.150 --> 00:18:16.240
  • If a child tells a lie, that doesn't make him a liar.
  • 00:18:16.250 --> 00:18:20.110
  • When a kid swipes a piece of candy from a candy store,
  • 00:18:20.120 --> 00:18:23.170
  • that doesn't make him a thief or a robber.
  • 00:18:23.180 --> 00:18:26.030
  • Now, he committed an act that was wrong,
  • 00:18:26.040 --> 00:18:28.070
  • he needs to deal with it.
  • 00:18:28.080 --> 00:18:29.190
  • Probably all of you can remember your parents marching you
  • 00:18:29.200 --> 00:18:31.250
  • back to the store where you grabbed
  • 00:18:31.260 --> 00:18:33.080
  • that piece of candy and having to tell him
  • 00:18:33.090 --> 00:18:34.260
  • what you did and you're embarrassed,
  • 00:18:34.270 --> 00:18:36.140
  • and they make sure you don't ever forget it.
  • 00:18:36.150 --> 00:18:39.190
  • But one act does not make a character.
  • 00:18:39.200 --> 00:18:43.160
  • As a man, I am much more than the sum
  • 00:18:43.170 --> 00:18:45.210
  • of all my individual failures, thank the Lord.
  • 00:18:45.220 --> 00:18:48.180
  • I've always acted in character in my life, but not always.
  • 00:18:48.190 --> 00:18:53.140
  • Sometimes to my shame, I've acted out of character.
  • 00:18:53.150 --> 00:18:56.280
  • All of us have failed in some area.
  • 00:18:56.290 --> 00:18:59.080
  • We've done things that we're embarrassed about
  • 00:18:59.090 --> 00:19:01.130
  • as we look back on them, but those individual actions
  • 00:19:01.140 --> 00:19:04.020
  • didn't create a person in the character of the act.
  • 00:19:04.030 --> 00:19:10.030
  • So, when you discipline your children,
  • 00:19:10.040 --> 00:19:12.090
  • don't get caught up in creating
  • 00:19:12.100 --> 00:19:14.070
  • an exaggerated image of their life.
  • 00:19:14.080 --> 00:19:16.240
  • If you keep on doing that, your child will become
  • 00:19:16.250 --> 00:19:20.040
  • the fulfillment of your prophecy.
  • 00:19:20.050 --> 00:19:22.270
  • You keep calling him a liar when he lied once,
  • 00:19:22.280 --> 00:19:26.110
  • and he'll become a liar.
  • 00:19:26.120 --> 00:19:29.210
  • The last of the four principles for oversight
  • 00:19:29.220 --> 00:19:32.030
  • is the principle of direction.
  • 00:19:32.040 --> 00:19:33.250
  • Bring them up in the admonition of the Lord.
  • 00:19:33.260 --> 00:19:37.170
  • Training, in the earlier verse is correction,
  • 00:19:37.180 --> 00:19:40.200
  • admonition is instruction.
  • 00:19:40.210 --> 00:19:43.100
  • We need to teach our kids what is right.
  • 00:19:43.110 --> 00:19:48.050
  • We need to help them learn the Scriptures.
  • 00:19:48.060 --> 00:19:51.270
  • I remember growing up in a pastor's home
  • 00:19:51.280 --> 00:19:54.150
  • and my parents introduced me to an organization
  • 00:19:54.160 --> 00:19:57.170
  • called the Bible Memory Association.
  • 00:19:57.180 --> 00:20:00.290
  • And I used to go to these classes every week
  • 00:20:01.000 --> 00:20:02.240
  • and get my little book
  • 00:20:02.250 --> 00:20:04.040
  • and learn the Scriptures that were in there
  • 00:20:04.050 --> 00:20:05.280
  • and get points for learning the Scripture.
  • 00:20:05.290 --> 00:20:07.240
  • I know I didn't always do it for the right reason,
  • 00:20:07.250 --> 00:20:09.220
  • but what I found out is that by learning the Scripture
  • 00:20:09.230 --> 00:20:11.260
  • when you're young, they stay with you forever.
  • 00:20:11.270 --> 00:20:14.230
  • Here's one that's really hard.
  • 00:20:14.240 --> 00:20:16.090
  • Galatians 2:20, "I am crucified with Christ,
  • 00:20:16.100 --> 00:20:18.190
  • nevertheless I live, yet not I,
  • 00:20:18.200 --> 00:20:20.030
  • but Christ liveth in me and the life
  • 00:20:20.040 --> 00:20:21.220
  • which I now live in the flesh.
  • 00:20:21.230 --> 00:20:23.020
  • I live by the faith of the Son of God who loved me
  • 00:20:23.030 --> 00:20:24.180
  • and gave himself for me."
  • 00:20:24.190 --> 00:20:26.030
  • I learned that when I was seven years old,
  • 00:20:26.040 --> 00:20:29.150
  • and I never have forgotten it.
  • 00:20:29.160 --> 00:20:31.220
  • Listen, to the instruction, the Bible tells us
  • 00:20:31.230 --> 00:20:35.100
  • to hide the Word of God in our hearts
  • 00:20:35.110 --> 00:20:37.210
  • and children are open to that.
  • 00:20:37.220 --> 00:20:40.190
  • That's why we love AWANA because AWANA
  • 00:20:40.200 --> 00:20:42.290
  • gets kids involved in the Scripture.
  • 00:20:43.000 --> 00:20:45.080
  • The Word of God in the heart of a person
  • 00:20:45.090 --> 00:20:46.250
  • will stay with them for life and while they may not
  • 00:20:46.260 --> 00:20:49.070
  • be following it along the way,
  • 00:20:49.080 --> 00:20:50.240
  • they will remember that it's there
  • 00:20:50.250 --> 00:20:52.170
  • and at the right time, it can be brought back up
  • 00:20:52.180 --> 00:20:54.140
  • to help them find their way.
  • 00:20:54.150 --> 00:20:57.270
  • Parents, we need to instruct our children.
  • 00:20:57.280 --> 00:20:59.260
  • I remember reading this exhortation to Timothy
  • 00:20:59.270 --> 00:21:03.090
  • in 2 Timothy 3:14 and 15.
  • 00:21:03.100 --> 00:21:05.140
  • "But you must continue in the things
  • 00:21:05.150 --> 00:21:06.270
  • which you have learned and been assured of,
  • 00:21:06.280 --> 00:21:09.090
  • knowing from whom you have learned them,
  • 00:21:09.100 --> 00:21:11.180
  • and that from childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures,"
  • 00:21:11.190 --> 00:21:17.010
  • from childhood.
  • 00:21:17.020 --> 00:21:19.010
  • So, there you have it, folks, what the Bible says
  • 00:21:19.020 --> 00:21:21.000
  • about being fully engaged parents,
  • 00:21:21.010 --> 00:21:23.110
  • both from the standpoint of obedience
  • 00:21:23.120 --> 00:21:26.000
  • on the part of the children, and oversight
  • 00:21:26.010 --> 00:21:29.010
  • on the part of parents.
  • 00:21:29.020 --> 00:21:31.160
  • I want to tell you what I know after four children,
  • 00:21:31.170 --> 00:21:35.020
  • 12 grandchildren, parenting is hard, hard.
  • 00:21:35.030 --> 00:21:42.130
  • Most wonderful thing in the world, but it's hard.
  • 00:21:42.140 --> 00:21:46.010
  • And all of us, if we're honest, we struggle
  • 00:21:46.020 --> 00:21:47.240
  • with how to put all this together.
  • 00:21:47.250 --> 00:21:49.190
  • How do we make this work?
  • 00:21:49.200 --> 00:21:51.140
  • How can we manage everything that we do in life,
  • 00:21:51.150 --> 00:21:55.080
  • and our families and be good parents in all of that?
  • 00:21:55.090 --> 00:22:00.080
  • And I need you to know that all of us
  • 00:22:00.090 --> 00:22:01.250
  • have struggled with it.
  • 00:22:01.260 --> 00:22:03.050
  • I struggle with it in a major way.
  • 00:22:03.060 --> 00:22:06.100
  • Early on in my life as a parent, I remember getting on my knees
  • 00:22:06.110 --> 00:22:12.150
  • and asking God to forgive me
  • 00:22:12.160 --> 00:22:14.040
  • for messed-up priorities and making a commitment to him
  • 00:22:14.050 --> 00:22:18.010
  • that with all my heart,
  • 00:22:18.020 --> 00:22:19.150
  • just like in everything else, I was gonna be a father.
  • 00:22:19.160 --> 00:22:22.210
  • And that whatever my kids needed,
  • 00:22:22.220 --> 00:22:24.040
  • I was gonna be there for them.
  • 00:22:24.050 --> 00:22:25.160
  • Wherever they needed me to be, I would be there.
  • 00:22:25.170 --> 00:22:29.260
  • And I'm looking back over my shoulder now
  • 00:22:29.270 --> 00:22:31.130
  • and remembering flying back and forth across the coast
  • 00:22:31.140 --> 00:22:34.100
  • for football games that I should never
  • 00:22:34.110 --> 00:22:36.000
  • have had any reason to do, except for one thing,
  • 00:22:36.010 --> 00:22:38.080
  • I was their dad.
  • 00:22:38.090 --> 00:22:41.080
  • I've never regretted that.
  • 00:22:41.090 --> 00:22:43.270
  • One day I was in my office and I wrote down what my priorities
  • 00:22:43.280 --> 00:22:47.170
  • of life should be based upon being a Christian father.
  • 00:22:47.180 --> 00:22:52.160
  • Here they are, I'm gonna give them to you.
  • 00:22:52.170 --> 00:22:53.290
  • There's four of them. They're real easy to remember.
  • 00:22:54.000 --> 00:22:56.160
  • You probably don't even have to take notes.
  • 00:22:56.170 --> 00:22:58.120
  • Here they are, I am a person, and I have a relationship
  • 00:22:58.130 --> 00:23:02.130
  • with God, priority number one.
  • 00:23:02.140 --> 00:23:05.110
  • I am a partner,
  • 00:23:05.120 --> 00:23:06.210
  • and I have a relationship with my spouse,
  • 00:23:06.220 --> 00:23:10.020
  • priority number two.
  • 00:23:10.030 --> 00:23:11.280
  • I am a parent, and I have a relationship with my children,
  • 00:23:11.290 --> 00:23:16.070
  • priority number three.
  • 00:23:16.080 --> 00:23:18.250
  • And then I am a pastor, and I have a relationship
  • 00:23:18.260 --> 00:23:23.010
  • with my church.
  • 00:23:23.020 --> 00:23:25.210
  • I remember the first time I shared that
  • 00:23:25.220 --> 00:23:27.030
  • with this congregation and told them,
  • 00:23:27.040 --> 00:23:29.030
  • with a smile on my face, that I hated to remind them
  • 00:23:29.040 --> 00:23:32.020
  • that they were now number four on my list.
  • 00:23:32.030 --> 00:23:36.190
  • I can't tell you how many people either came to me
  • 00:23:36.200 --> 00:23:38.180
  • or wrote me and said,
  • 00:23:38.190 --> 00:23:39.280
  • "Don't ever let us get higher because, Dr. Jeremiah,
  • 00:23:39.290 --> 00:23:43.060
  • if one, two, and three aren't right,
  • 00:23:43.070 --> 00:23:45.190
  • you don't have anything to offer to us."
  • 00:23:45.200 --> 00:23:48.240
  • And I believe that with all my heart,
  • 00:23:48.250 --> 00:23:51.000
  • and I want to encourage you, parents,
  • 00:23:51.010 --> 00:23:52.200
  • you can make this work.
  • 00:23:52.210 --> 00:23:54.230
  • You just need to sit down and figure out that your kids
  • 00:23:54.240 --> 00:23:57.160
  • and your wife are more important than anything else.
  • 00:23:57.170 --> 00:24:01.160
  • Factor them into your schedule, somehow make it work,
  • 00:24:01.170 --> 00:24:05.010
  • and then commit yourself to it and you'll fail
  • 00:24:05.020 --> 00:24:07.250
  • and then you'll always come back.
  • 00:24:07.260 --> 00:24:09.110
  • But if you have a list, if you have a formula,
  • 00:24:09.120 --> 00:24:13.140
  • if you have that formula,
  • 00:24:13.150 --> 00:24:14.270
  • you will always have someplace to come back to,
  • 00:24:14.280 --> 00:24:18.060
  • and God will help you.
  • 00:24:18.070 --> 00:24:20.200
  • The secret to our success as a church is the health
  • 00:24:20.210 --> 00:24:25.010
  • of our families.
  • 00:24:25.020 --> 00:24:27.230
  • And I hope that today maybe God put something in your heart
  • 00:24:27.240 --> 00:24:31.240
  • that will help you to make your families,
  • 00:24:31.250 --> 00:24:34.290
  • your children, your grandchildren, strong.
  • 00:24:35.000 --> 00:24:37.270
  • We're in this for the long haul and God wants us to be healthy.
  • 00:24:37.280 --> 00:24:43.010
  • This is one of the building blocks for that goal.
  • 00:24:43.020 --> 00:24:45.030
  • 00:24:45.080 --> 00:24:47.250
  • male announcer: Dr. Jeremiah will return
  • 00:24:47.260 --> 00:24:49.140
  • to close today's program right after this.
  • 00:24:49.150 --> 00:24:52.100
  • female announcer: Thank you for watching today.
  • 00:24:54.100 --> 00:24:56.010
  • When you support this program with a gift of any amount,
  • 00:24:56.020 --> 00:24:58.290
  • Dr. Jeremiah would like to thank you by sending you
  • 00:24:59.000 --> 00:25:01.290
  • "Daily In His Presence,"
  • 00:25:02.000 --> 00:25:03.190
  • his new 365-day devotional for 2020.
  • 00:25:03.200 --> 00:25:08.010
  • Each day's short reading in this beautiful,
  • 00:25:08.020 --> 00:25:10.000
  • leather-bound devotional provides Scripture
  • 00:25:10.010 --> 00:25:12.170
  • and a spiritual thought to encourage you,
  • 00:25:12.180 --> 00:25:14.210
  • challenge you, and focus your attention on God
  • 00:25:14.220 --> 00:25:17.230
  • so you can experience God's will in your life
  • 00:25:17.240 --> 00:25:20.230
  • and enter into the company of the Savior.
  • 00:25:20.240 --> 00:25:23.240
  • This devotional is also perfect for sharing with others.
  • 00:25:23.250 --> 00:25:27.070
  • And with a generous yearend gift of $120 or more
  • 00:25:27.080 --> 00:25:30.180
  • in support of this program,
  • 00:25:30.190 --> 00:25:32.080
  • you will receive a four-pack of "Daily In His Presence"
  • 00:25:32.090 --> 00:25:35.140
  • so that you can give your loved ones a copy
  • 00:25:35.150 --> 00:25:37.180
  • and help them walk ever closer to God
  • 00:25:37.190 --> 00:25:39.220
  • in the coming year.
  • 00:25:39.230 --> 00:25:41.140
  • Your support helps this program continue on this station
  • 00:25:41.150 --> 00:25:44.170
  • and keeps the ministry on firm financial footing
  • 00:25:44.180 --> 00:25:47.060
  • into the new year.
  • 00:25:47.070 --> 00:25:48.220
  • Contact "Turning Point" today.
  • 00:25:48.230 --> 00:25:52.100
  • male announcer: And now with one last word
  • 00:25:52.110 --> 00:25:53.230
  • for today's program, here is Dr. Jeremiah.
  • 00:25:53.240 --> 00:25:57.170
  • Dr. Jeremiah: Nobody will disagree that parenting
  • 00:25:57.180 --> 00:25:59.160
  • is critical and challenging,
  • 00:25:59.170 --> 00:26:02.140
  • but where do we look to find a role model for parenting
  • 00:26:02.150 --> 00:26:05.270
  • to discover how to order our priorities
  • 00:26:05.280 --> 00:26:08.290
  • for a task that takes everything we have?
  • 00:26:09.000 --> 00:26:12.150
  • We start by looking at God, our Heavenly Father,
  • 00:26:12.160 --> 00:26:16.200
  • and our divine parent.
  • 00:26:16.210 --> 00:26:19.030
  • To know God as a Father, we must first become his child
  • 00:26:19.040 --> 00:26:22.260
  • by faith in Jesus Christ his Son.
  • 00:26:22.270 --> 00:26:25.250
  • I would love to encourage you in that direction
  • 00:26:25.260 --> 00:26:28.200
  • by sending you two free gifts from "Turning Point,"
  • 00:26:28.210 --> 00:26:31.270
  • a booklet called, "Your Greatest Turning Point,"
  • 00:26:31.280 --> 00:26:34.130
  • and our monthly devotional magazine
  • 00:26:34.140 --> 00:26:36.150
  • called, "Turning Points."
  • 00:26:36.160 --> 00:26:38.190
  • These are not specifically parenting resources,
  • 00:26:38.200 --> 00:26:42.070
  • but they will lead you into a deeper relationship with God,
  • 00:26:42.080 --> 00:26:45.180
  • our Heavenly Father.
  • 00:26:45.190 --> 00:26:47.070
  • We will be happy to send them both to you free of charge
  • 00:26:47.080 --> 00:26:49.220
  • if you will contact us here at "Turning Point" today.
  • 00:26:49.230 --> 00:26:52.220
  • announcer: Next time on "Turning Point."
  • 00:26:54.040 --> 00:26:56.050
  • Dr. Jeremiah: I want you to help.
  • 00:26:56.060 --> 00:26:57.230
  • I want you to be a part.
  • 00:26:57.240 --> 00:26:59.070
  • I want you to be a member.
  • 00:26:59.080 --> 00:27:00.230
  • I want you to do today what you're gonna be glad
  • 00:27:00.240 --> 00:27:04.140
  • you've done when you stand before the Lord someday
  • 00:27:04.150 --> 00:27:06.190
  • and he asks you about how you spent your life
  • 00:27:06.200 --> 00:27:10.260
  • Let's get fully engaged with the church.
  • 00:27:10.270 --> 00:27:12.180
  • announcer: Join us next time for Dr. Jeremiah's message,
  • 00:27:14.040 --> 00:27:16.200
  • Fully Engaged With My Church here on "Turning Point."
  • 00:27:16.210 --> 00:27:21.130