Meant to Be Part 2 | TBN

Meant to Be Part 2

Watch Meant to Be Part 2
September 2, 2019
27:30

Steven Furtick

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Meant to Be Part 2

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  • - Whether you're married
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  • or single, the real gift is not
  • 00:00:04.050 --> 00:00:07.050
  • the marriage or the singleness.
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  • That is a gift
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  • but it's not the greatest gift.
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  • The greatest gift that
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  • God gives is called grace.
  • 00:00:16.070 --> 00:00:19.070
  • He says, "One person
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  • has one gift, one has another.
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  • But no matter which gift
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  • you have,
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  • here's what you really need.
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  • You're going to need grace
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  • - We're starting this series
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  • today, which I have boldly
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  • called -- well the title is
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  • "Meant to Be" but the subtitle
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  • says, "It's the Bible's
  • 00:00:38.070 --> 00:00:39.110
  • Best Kept Secrets About Sex,
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  • Marriage, and Being Single."
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  • 1 Corinthians 7:1-7.
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  • "Paul says, 'Now for the matters
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  • you wrote about, it is good
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  • for a man not to have
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  • sexual relations with a woman.
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  • But since sexual immorality
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  • is occurring, each man should
  • 00:00:55.010 --> 00:00:56.130
  • have sexual relations
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  • with his own wife and each woman
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  • with her own husband.'"
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  • The title of my
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  • message today, appropriately
  • 00:01:01.130 --> 00:01:03.190
  • I think, is "It Is Good
  • 00:01:03.190 --> 00:01:05.000
  • for a Man Not to Have
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  • Sexual Relations With a Woman."
  • 00:01:07.010 --> 00:01:09.120
  • But in order to understand
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  • the text, you do have to
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  • understand the context.
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  • The first thing --
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  • I have four of these --
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  • that we want to talk about
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  • today is the tension between
  • 00:01:16.180 --> 00:01:17.250
  • questions and issues.
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  • Now historically the church
  • 00:01:20.240 --> 00:01:21.260
  • has been really good
  • 00:01:21.260 --> 00:01:23.170
  • at answering questions
  • 00:01:23.170 --> 00:01:24.140
  • that nobody is asking
  • 00:01:24.140 --> 00:01:25.140
  • while being silent about
  • 00:01:25.140 --> 00:01:26.100
  • the struggles that everybody
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  • is facing.
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  • I want to take five weeks
  • 00:01:28.110 --> 00:01:29.130
  • with you and have conversations
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  • about real issues,
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  • because some of you,
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  • the questions that
  • 00:01:34.150 --> 00:01:35.120
  • you're asking are not indicative
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  • of the real issues
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  • that you're dealing with.
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  • I want to talk for a second
  • 00:01:39.270 --> 00:01:41.040
  • about suggestions and standards.
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  • Suggestions and standards.
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  • Paul says, "In the church
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  • there is sexual immorality
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  • that is occurring."
  • 00:01:49.250 --> 00:01:52.120
  • That means there's
  • 00:01:52.120 --> 00:01:53.050
  • still a standard.
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  • If there's such a thing
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  • as sexual immorality,
  • 00:01:55.040 --> 00:01:55.190
  • there's such a thing
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  • as sexual morality.
  • 00:01:56.130 --> 00:01:57.200
  • That means there's still
  • 00:01:57.200 --> 00:01:58.120
  • a right way to do sexuality.
  • 00:01:58.120 --> 00:02:00.260
  • And here it is.
  • 00:02:00.260 --> 00:02:01.200
  • He defines it.
  • 00:02:01.200 --> 00:02:02.110
  • We don't have to make this stuff
  • 00:02:02.110 --> 00:02:03.150
  • up because the bible gives
  • 00:02:03.150 --> 00:02:04.070
  • it to us straight.
  • 00:02:04.070 --> 00:02:04.270
  • Here is God's sexual standard.
  • 00:02:04.270 --> 00:02:06.190
  • It's so clear.
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  • Verse two.
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  • People ask us all the time,
  • 00:02:07.290 --> 00:02:09.000
  • "What is the church's
  • 00:02:09.000 --> 00:02:09.210
  • position on this....?"
  • 00:02:10.030 --> 00:02:13.030
  • They say that all the time.
  • 00:02:13.030 --> 00:02:13.270
  • That's exactly how they say it.
  • 00:02:13.270 --> 00:02:15.070
  • [Mumbles]
  • 00:02:15.070 --> 00:02:17.170
  • And so we say this.
  • 00:02:17.170 --> 00:02:18.150
  • We say, "Okay.
  • 00:02:18.150 --> 00:02:19.170
  • 1 Corinthians 7:2."
  • 00:02:19.170 --> 00:02:20.140
  • I'm not making something up.
  • 00:02:20.140 --> 00:02:21.200
  • Each man should have
  • 00:02:21.200 --> 00:02:22.150
  • sexual relations
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  • with his own wife
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  • and each woman with her
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  • own husband.
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  • That's like what we believe.
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  • Let's read it again.
  • 00:02:28.290 --> 00:02:30.290
  • Out loud together as a class.
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  • Each man should have
  • 00:02:34.230 --> 00:02:35.260
  • sexual relations
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  • with his own wife
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  • and each woman with her
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  • own husband.
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  • "But I don't have a husband."
  • 00:02:42.060 --> 00:02:43.150
  • Then you don't get
  • 00:02:43.150 --> 00:02:44.060
  • to have sex yet.
  • 00:02:44.270 --> 00:02:47.270
  • "I don't have a wife."
  • 00:02:47.270 --> 00:02:49.100
  • Then you don't get
  • 00:02:49.100 --> 00:02:50.030
  • to have sex yet.
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  • There's still a standard.
  • 00:02:52.230 --> 00:02:55.180
  • This is not a suggestion
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  • and God does not impose
  • 00:02:58.220 --> 00:02:59.180
  • standards on you to make
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  • your life more miserable.
  • 00:03:00.210 --> 00:03:02.270
  • You know what fascinated me?
  • 00:03:02.270 --> 00:03:04.010
  • A friend of mine told me
  • 00:03:04.010 --> 00:03:04.230
  • this the other day.
  • 00:03:04.230 --> 00:03:05.130
  • I never saw it before.
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  • He said, "Did you notice what
  • 00:03:07.060 --> 00:03:08.140
  • God did in the garden to
  • 00:03:08.140 --> 00:03:09.130
  • Adam before He gave him Eve?"
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  • I said, "No, I never thought
  • 00:03:11.030 --> 00:03:12.120
  • about it."
  • 00:03:12.120 --> 00:03:13.060
  • Well in Genesis 2:18,
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  • it says it's not good for man
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  • to be alone.
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  • But in Genesis 2:17,
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  • God shows the man the tree
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  • in the garden
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  • that he is not to touch,
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  • and he says,
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  • "You can eat of any tree
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  • except this one,
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  • for when you touch this one,
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  • you will surely die."
  • 00:03:25.230 --> 00:03:26.290
  • And then in verse 18,
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  • He gives him Eve.
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  • So watch this.
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  • God sets the boundaries before
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  • He gives Adam the blessing.
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  • Because He knows if He gives you
  • 00:03:35.230 --> 00:03:36.260
  • a blessing and doesn't give you
  • 00:03:36.260 --> 00:03:38.110
  • any boundaries,
  • 00:03:38.110 --> 00:03:39.040
  • it won't be a blessing anymore.
  • 00:03:39.040 --> 00:03:42.010
  • And none of us in this church
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  • really believe that there should
  • 00:03:43.040 --> 00:03:44.060
  • be no sexual standards.
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  • And all of us in this church
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  • have known someone who has been
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  • the victim of someone whose
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  • sexual passion created in
  • 00:03:50.280 --> 00:03:52.200
  • a way a type of sick obsession.
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  • We've all known somebody who was
  • 00:03:55.170 --> 00:03:56.220
  • touched inappropriately,
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  • violated inappropriately.
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  • It's not that anybody
  • 00:03:59.130 --> 00:04:00.210
  • in the church thinks there
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  • shouldn't be any
  • 00:04:02.010 --> 00:04:02.260
  • sexual standards.
  • 00:04:02.260 --> 00:04:03.190
  • We just all want to define
  • 00:04:03.190 --> 00:04:04.120
  • what they are.
  • 00:04:04.120 --> 00:04:06.190
  • There's a real problem
  • 00:04:06.190 --> 00:04:07.120
  • with that.
  • 00:04:07.120 --> 00:04:09.080
  • And so there is a standard.
  • 00:04:09.080 --> 00:04:11.220
  • There is a standard.
  • 00:04:11.220 --> 00:04:13.260
  • There's still a standard.
  • 00:04:14.260 --> 00:04:17.260
  • Each man should have
  • 00:04:17.260 --> 00:04:19.060
  • sexual relations
  • 00:04:19.060 --> 00:04:20.070
  • with his own wife.
  • 00:04:20.070 --> 00:04:22.100
  • If she's your girlfriend,
  • 00:04:22.100 --> 00:04:23.060
  • she's not your wife.
  • 00:04:23.060 --> 00:04:26.040
  • And each woman
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  • with her own husband.
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  • Okay.
  • 00:04:29.160 --> 00:04:30.040
  • I had my first person walk out.
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  • So I'm doing good now.
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  • I'm doing good.
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  • Have a good trip home.
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  • Amen.
  • 00:04:36.160 --> 00:04:37.260
  • And I'm not ashamed to talk
  • 00:04:37.260 --> 00:04:40.020
  • about these standards.
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  • Because when you go against
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  • God's standards,
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  • you don't break the standard.
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  • The standard breaks you.
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  • And so we need
  • 00:04:51.100 --> 00:04:53.010
  • to raise a standard.
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  • We're going to do that
  • 00:04:55.090 --> 00:04:56.020
  • in this series.
  • 00:04:56.020 --> 00:04:58.080
  • There's still a standard.
  • 00:04:58.080 --> 00:05:00.120
  • The next two words we'll talk
  • 00:05:00.120 --> 00:05:02.260
  • about -- I only have four
  • 00:05:02.260 --> 00:05:03.260
  • of these, so we're over
  • 00:05:03.260 --> 00:05:05.220
  • halfway done with this
  • 00:05:05.220 --> 00:05:08.090
  • uncomfortable sermon.
  • 00:05:08.090 --> 00:05:10.290
  • Which is the least uncomfortable
  • 00:05:10.290 --> 00:05:12.020
  • of all in
  • 00:05:12.020 --> 00:05:13.030
  • the five-sermon series.
  • 00:05:13.030 --> 00:05:15.280
  • See you next week.
  • 00:05:15.280 --> 00:05:18.140
  • I'll talk about
  • 00:05:18.140 --> 00:05:19.040
  • desire and duty.
  • 00:05:19.040 --> 00:05:19.220
  • Desire and duty.
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  • Desire and duty.
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  • Look at verse three.
  • 00:05:23.240 --> 00:05:24.290
  • Is it all right if I just teach
  • 00:05:24.290 --> 00:05:26.010
  • you verse by verse like this?
  • 00:05:26.010 --> 00:05:27.180
  • - Congregation: Yes.
  • 00:05:27.180 --> 00:05:29.140
  • Okay.
  • 00:05:29.140 --> 00:05:30.020
  • He says, "The husband
  • 00:05:30.020 --> 00:05:32.100
  • should fulfill his marital duty
  • 00:05:32.100 --> 00:05:35.050
  • to his wife."
  • 00:05:35.050 --> 00:05:36.030
  • He's talking in the context
  • 00:05:36.030 --> 00:05:37.060
  • of sexuality.
  • 00:05:37.060 --> 00:05:38.060
  • And he says, "Hey dude,
  • 00:05:38.060 --> 00:05:39.140
  • you got a job to do at home."
  • 00:05:39.260 --> 00:05:42.260
  • Now I know this isn't
  • 00:05:42.260 --> 00:05:43.190
  • the romantic language
  • 00:05:43.190 --> 00:05:44.210
  • in the world.
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  • How many of you women,
  • 00:05:46.150 --> 00:05:47.140
  • when you used to fantasize
  • 00:05:47.140 --> 00:05:48.090
  • about the man you would
  • 00:05:48.090 --> 00:05:49.070
  • meet one day, you prayed that
  • 00:05:49.070 --> 00:05:50.270
  • he would see you as his duty?
  • 00:05:50.270 --> 00:05:52.260
  • Raise your hands please.
  • 00:05:52.260 --> 00:05:54.270
  • "I just want a man that puts me
  • 00:05:54.270 --> 00:05:55.260
  • on the same list as taking out
  • 00:05:55.260 --> 00:05:57.050
  • the trash and washing dishes
  • 00:05:57.050 --> 00:06:00.020
  • and paying bills."
  • 00:06:00.020 --> 00:06:02.110
  • But he says here, "The husband
  • 00:06:02.110 --> 00:06:04.030
  • should fulfill his marital,"
  • 00:06:04.030 --> 00:06:05.260
  • let's say the word, "Duty."
  • 00:06:05.260 --> 00:06:08.180
  • He doesn't say anything about
  • 00:06:08.180 --> 00:06:10.090
  • the husband fulfilling
  • 00:06:10.090 --> 00:06:11.140
  • his sexual desire.
  • 00:06:11.140 --> 00:06:13.270
  • Why?
  • 00:06:13.270 --> 00:06:15.000
  • Because desire is meant to be
  • 00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:16.260
  • a byproduct in relationship,
  • 00:06:16.260 --> 00:06:19.030
  • not a goal.
  • 00:06:21.000 --> 00:06:24.000
  • He said, "The husband
  • 00:06:24.000 --> 00:06:25.170
  • should fulfill his marital duty
  • 00:06:25.170 --> 00:06:26.280
  • to his wife."
  • 00:06:26.280 --> 00:06:27.190
  • This includes sexuality.
  • 00:06:27.190 --> 00:06:29.010
  • This includes emotions.
  • 00:06:29.010 --> 00:06:30.100
  • This includes
  • 00:06:30.100 --> 00:06:32.020
  • physical provision.
  • 00:06:32.020 --> 00:06:33.090
  • "And likewise the wife to
  • 00:06:33.090 --> 00:06:34.100
  • her husband."
  • 00:06:34.100 --> 00:06:34.260
  • Look at verse four.
  • 00:06:34.260 --> 00:06:36.090
  • "The wife does not have
  • 00:06:36.090 --> 00:06:37.100
  • authority over her own body
  • 00:06:37.100 --> 00:06:39.140
  • but yields it to her husband."
  • 00:06:40.140 --> 00:06:43.140
  • I just saw a lot of
  • 00:06:43.140 --> 00:06:44.070
  • crossed female arms.
  • 00:06:45.280 --> 00:06:48.280
  • But before all of you men
  • 00:06:48.280 --> 00:06:49.290
  • go home and make magnets
  • 00:06:49.290 --> 00:06:51.160
  • for your refrigerator
  • 00:06:51.160 --> 00:06:52.240
  • with 1 Corinthians 7:4,
  • 00:06:52.240 --> 00:06:55.040
  • like, "That's my verse yo!
  • 00:06:55.190 --> 00:06:58.190
  • Now you're preaching."
  • 00:07:00.210 --> 00:07:03.210
  • Before you do it -- because in
  • 00:07:03.210 --> 00:07:05.020
  • a misogynistic society
  • 00:07:05.020 --> 00:07:05.280
  • where men often saw women
  • 00:07:05.280 --> 00:07:07.140
  • as their property,
  • 00:07:07.140 --> 00:07:08.190
  • all the men in
  • 00:07:08.190 --> 00:07:09.140
  • the Corinthian church
  • 00:07:09.140 --> 00:07:10.050
  • were saying amen right here.
  • 00:07:10.050 --> 00:07:11.140
  • But then Paul flips it and says
  • 00:07:11.140 --> 00:07:12.200
  • something that would've been
  • 00:07:12.200 --> 00:07:14.010
  • very controversial
  • 00:07:14.010 --> 00:07:14.220
  • and uncommon in the day.
  • 00:07:14.220 --> 00:07:15.120
  • He introduces a concept
  • 00:07:15.120 --> 00:07:16.050
  • called mutual submission.
  • 00:07:16.050 --> 00:07:17.140
  • Watch this.
  • 00:07:17.140 --> 00:07:18.080
  • "In the same way, the husband
  • 00:07:18.080 --> 00:07:20.050
  • does not have authority over
  • 00:07:20.050 --> 00:07:21.210
  • his own body but yields it
  • 00:07:21.210 --> 00:07:23.020
  • to his wife."
  • 00:07:23.070 --> 00:07:26.070
  • And so if I could break it down
  • 00:07:26.070 --> 00:07:27.060
  • in a contemporary version
  • 00:07:27.060 --> 00:07:28.030
  • of what I think Paul is trying
  • 00:07:28.030 --> 00:07:30.080
  • to say, it's not about you, boo.
  • 00:07:36.020 --> 00:07:39.020
  • Inform the person next to you.
  • 00:07:39.020 --> 00:07:40.100
  • It's not about you, boo, boo.
  • 00:07:43.250 --> 00:07:46.250
  • It's just not
  • 00:07:46.250 --> 00:07:48.050
  • in a biblical context.
  • 00:07:48.050 --> 00:07:49.290
  • Like if you want to do what
  • 00:07:49.290 --> 00:07:51.030
  • the world does, it's all going
  • 00:07:51.030 --> 00:07:52.110
  • to be led by desire.
  • 00:07:52.110 --> 00:07:54.020
  • So whatever you feel like,
  • 00:07:54.020 --> 00:07:55.000
  • whatever you want,
  • 00:07:55.000 --> 00:07:55.280
  • you're going to take it.
  • 00:07:55.280 --> 00:07:56.190
  • And then you're going to take it
  • 00:07:56.190 --> 00:07:57.150
  • and then you're going to
  • 00:07:57.150 --> 00:07:58.080
  • consume it.
  • 00:07:58.080 --> 00:07:59.010
  • And then it's going to end up
  • 00:07:59.010 --> 00:07:59.280
  • creating reactions in your life
  • 00:07:59.280 --> 00:08:00.270
  • and habits and addictions
  • 00:08:00.270 --> 00:08:01.240
  • in your life because you're led
  • 00:08:01.240 --> 00:08:03.010
  • by your desire.
  • 00:08:03.010 --> 00:08:04.020
  • But Paul doesn't talk about
  • 00:08:04.020 --> 00:08:05.040
  • desire here.
  • 00:08:05.040 --> 00:08:06.060
  • Like desire is a good thing.
  • 00:08:06.060 --> 00:08:07.200
  • We all have desire.
  • 00:08:07.200 --> 00:08:09.020
  • Desire can light a fire
  • 00:08:09.020 --> 00:08:10.140
  • but only duty can
  • 00:08:10.140 --> 00:08:11.130
  • keep it burning.
  • 00:08:15.180 --> 00:08:18.180
  • Now I'm a fan of marriage.
  • 00:08:18.180 --> 00:08:21.020
  • It is never a job to be
  • 00:08:21.020 --> 00:08:22.070
  • married to Holly, ever.
  • 00:08:23.270 --> 00:08:26.270
  • Ever.
  • 00:08:26.270 --> 00:08:27.290
  • and she would say
  • 00:08:27.290 --> 00:08:28.230
  • the same about me.
  • 00:08:29.060 --> 00:08:32.060
  • But assuming I could relate
  • 00:08:32.060 --> 00:08:33.160
  • to this verse,
  • 00:08:33.160 --> 00:08:34.130
  • I'm trying to scare
  • 00:08:34.130 --> 00:08:36.160
  • some of you off from
  • 00:08:36.160 --> 00:08:37.090
  • your ideal of marriage.
  • 00:08:38.070 --> 00:08:41.070
  • The other day we were looking
  • 00:08:41.070 --> 00:08:42.000
  • at some really cute pictures
  • 00:08:42.000 --> 00:08:42.220
  • of the kids and they were being
  • 00:08:42.220 --> 00:08:43.260
  • obnoxious in the house
  • 00:08:43.260 --> 00:08:44.200
  • and I had this thought.
  • 00:08:44.200 --> 00:08:45.180
  • Sometimes I like looking
  • 00:08:45.180 --> 00:08:46.140
  • at pictures of them better than
  • 00:08:46.140 --> 00:08:47.230
  • actually being with them.
  • 00:08:51.210 --> 00:08:54.210
  • You can pose them like
  • 00:08:54.210 --> 00:08:55.130
  • you want to and go through
  • 00:08:55.130 --> 00:08:56.270
  • the good ones and filter it.
  • 00:08:58.110 --> 00:09:01.130
  • A lot of you are in love
  • 00:09:01.130 --> 00:09:02.090
  • with the picture of marriage,
  • 00:09:02.120 --> 00:09:05.120
  • the picture of relationships.
  • 00:09:06.130 --> 00:09:09.130
  • But then we introduce
  • 00:09:09.130 --> 00:09:10.100
  • a word like duty.
  • 00:09:10.100 --> 00:09:12.140
  • That word doesn't even sound --
  • 00:09:12.140 --> 00:09:13.230
  • that's like the most unromantic
  • 00:09:13.230 --> 00:09:15.060
  • sounding word
  • 00:09:15.060 --> 00:09:16.030
  • and it's the one Paul uses.
  • 00:09:16.030 --> 00:09:18.010
  • He said it's a duty sometimes.
  • 00:09:18.290 --> 00:09:21.290
  • And we got all these people
  • 00:09:21.290 --> 00:09:22.270
  • going into marriages based
  • 00:09:22.270 --> 00:09:25.090
  • out of desire and not knowing
  • 00:09:25.090 --> 00:09:28.060
  • about the duty.
  • 00:09:28.060 --> 00:09:30.250
  • Like if you're going to
  • 00:09:30.250 --> 00:09:33.110
  • get married, you better be ready
  • 00:09:33.110 --> 00:09:35.020
  • to go to work some days.
  • 00:09:35.080 --> 00:09:38.080
  • Not just go to work.
  • 00:09:38.080 --> 00:09:40.020
  • You're going to go to work
  • 00:09:40.020 --> 00:09:41.070
  • and do a job, then you're going
  • 00:09:41.070 --> 00:09:42.050
  • to come home and do another job.
  • 00:09:42.050 --> 00:09:44.010
  • Because it takes work
  • 00:09:44.010 --> 00:09:45.050
  • to make this thing work.
  • 00:09:48.000 --> 00:09:51.000
  • "My marriage isn't working."
  • 00:09:51.000 --> 00:09:52.020
  • Because you're not.
  • 00:09:53.030 --> 00:09:56.030
  • If you went to your job
  • 00:09:56.030 --> 00:09:57.120
  • like you came home,
  • 00:09:57.120 --> 00:09:58.030
  • you wouldn't have a job.
  • 00:10:00.120 --> 00:10:03.120
  • Is this okay?
  • 00:10:03.120 --> 00:10:04.100
  • - Congregation: Yes.
  • 00:10:04.100 --> 00:10:06.040
  • - We'll have plenty of
  • 00:10:06.040 --> 00:10:06.280
  • empty seats next week if you
  • 00:10:06.280 --> 00:10:08.010
  • want to bring a
  • 00:10:08.010 --> 00:10:09.000
  • first-time guest.
  • 00:10:09.000 --> 00:10:09.240
  • I know some of y'all are in
  • 00:10:09.240 --> 00:10:10.220
  • overflow today but we'll be able
  • 00:10:10.220 --> 00:10:11.210
  • to accommodate your friends
  • 00:10:11.210 --> 00:10:12.240
  • and family members next week.
  • 00:10:12.240 --> 00:10:14.160
  • I have a feeling
  • 00:10:14.160 --> 00:10:15.050
  • this is a space-maker.
  • 00:10:17.180 --> 00:10:20.180
  • But somebody needs to say this.
  • 00:10:21.030 --> 00:10:24.030
  • Somebody needs to tell you.
  • 00:10:24.030 --> 00:10:25.180
  • And sometimes you come home
  • 00:10:25.180 --> 00:10:28.100
  • and you have to do a drive by
  • 00:10:28.100 --> 00:10:29.250
  • before you pull in your driveway
  • 00:10:29.250 --> 00:10:31.270
  • and just do a couple laps
  • 00:10:31.270 --> 00:10:33.220
  • before you can go inside
  • 00:10:33.220 --> 00:10:35.090
  • and face what's going on inside
  • 00:10:35.090 --> 00:10:37.250
  • because sometimes
  • 00:10:37.250 --> 00:10:38.210
  • it's not pretty like a picture.
  • 00:10:41.250 --> 00:10:44.250
  • Sometimes it's challenging.
  • 00:10:46.170 --> 00:10:49.170
  • Yeah, sometimes it's difficult
  • 00:10:49.170 --> 00:10:51.260
  • to go through different seasons
  • 00:10:51.260 --> 00:10:52.290
  • and you change and they change
  • 00:10:52.290 --> 00:10:54.040
  • and maybe they change in a way
  • 00:10:54.040 --> 00:10:55.070
  • that you don't change,
  • 00:10:55.070 --> 00:10:56.020
  • and you've got to accommodate
  • 00:10:56.020 --> 00:10:56.270
  • each other.
  • 00:10:56.270 --> 00:10:57.160
  • and where are you now?
  • 00:10:57.160 --> 00:10:58.070
  • And I got to overlook offense.
  • 00:10:58.070 --> 00:10:59.130
  • I know what you look like
  • 00:10:59.130 --> 00:11:00.140
  • when you first wake up
  • 00:11:00.140 --> 00:11:01.180
  • and you know what I look like
  • 00:11:01.180 --> 00:11:02.150
  • at the end of a hard day.
  • 00:11:02.150 --> 00:11:03.140
  • And we're not fooling each other
  • 00:11:03.140 --> 00:11:04.260
  • anymore because we had
  • 00:11:04.260 --> 00:11:05.200
  • a whole lot of pre-memorize,
  • 00:11:05.200 --> 00:11:06.270
  • pre-programmed stuff that we did
  • 00:11:06.270 --> 00:11:07.260
  • for each other during dating.
  • 00:11:07.260 --> 00:11:08.290
  • and all that crap's out
  • 00:11:08.290 --> 00:11:10.070
  • the window now because it
  • 00:11:10.070 --> 00:11:11.030
  • just got real.
  • 00:11:11.030 --> 00:11:12.210
  • And without a sense
  • 00:11:12.210 --> 00:11:13.200
  • of commitment,
  • 00:11:13.200 --> 00:11:14.150
  • if you come in here
  • 00:11:14.150 --> 00:11:15.160
  • to this marriage thing,
  • 00:11:15.160 --> 00:11:16.170
  • this relationship thing,
  • 00:11:16.170 --> 00:11:18.000
  • this life thing, with
  • 00:11:18.000 --> 00:11:19.000
  • "What can I get out of it?"
  • 00:11:19.000 --> 00:11:21.030
  • You've missed the point,
  • 00:11:21.030 --> 00:11:23.000
  • Paul says.
  • 00:11:23.000 --> 00:11:25.060
  • He says come to it, whether
  • 00:11:25.060 --> 00:11:26.190
  • it's sexually, emotionally,
  • 00:11:26.190 --> 00:11:29.050
  • relationally, come to it not for
  • 00:11:29.050 --> 00:11:30.270
  • what you can get
  • 00:11:30.270 --> 00:11:32.010
  • but what you can give.
  • 00:11:32.120 --> 00:11:35.120
  • You are giving yourself away.
  • 00:11:36.270 --> 00:11:39.270
  • And I think a whole lot of us
  • 00:11:39.270 --> 00:11:41.060
  • want the gift of a relationship
  • 00:11:41.060 --> 00:11:43.260
  • without the giving of ourselves
  • 00:11:43.260 --> 00:11:45.050
  • in a relationship.
  • 00:11:45.280 --> 00:11:48.280
  • I think a whole lot of us
  • 00:11:48.280 --> 00:11:50.020
  • are messed up about this.
  • 00:11:50.020 --> 00:11:52.220
  • Marriage is the best thing
  • 00:11:52.220 --> 00:11:54.200
  • but it's not the easiest thing.
  • 00:11:54.200 --> 00:11:57.040
  • And if you go in knowing that,
  • 00:11:57.040 --> 00:11:58.190
  • you'll probably have
  • 00:11:58.190 --> 00:11:59.160
  • a blessed marriage.
  • 00:11:59.160 --> 00:12:00.220
  • If you don't,
  • 00:12:00.220 --> 00:12:01.090
  • here's what'll happen.
  • 00:12:01.090 --> 00:12:02.100
  • You'll go in with expectations
  • 00:12:02.100 --> 00:12:03.220
  • of romance and then you'll meet
  • 00:12:03.220 --> 00:12:05.150
  • a friend called reality.
  • 00:12:06.160 --> 00:12:09.160
  • Romance and reality
  • 00:12:09.160 --> 00:12:12.160
  • don't always get along.
  • 00:12:13.130 --> 00:12:16.130
  • And then romance and reality,
  • 00:12:16.130 --> 00:12:17.240
  • they get together and they have
  • 00:12:18.060 --> 00:12:21.060
  • a baby and the baby is called
  • 00:12:21.060 --> 00:12:24.060
  • -- romance, reality --
  • 00:12:25.130 --> 00:12:28.130
  • then it's probably going to be
  • 00:12:28.130 --> 00:12:30.130
  • resentment, which is
  • 00:12:30.200 --> 00:12:33.200
  • going to create rebellion
  • 00:12:34.000 --> 00:12:37.000
  • if you go into it looking for
  • 00:12:37.000 --> 00:12:38.080
  • what you can get.
  • 00:12:38.080 --> 00:12:40.100
  • Now I'm not just talking about
  • 00:12:40.100 --> 00:12:41.050
  • marriage anymore either.
  • 00:12:41.050 --> 00:12:42.130
  • This is why some of you
  • 00:12:42.130 --> 00:12:43.120
  • don't have any
  • 00:12:43.120 --> 00:12:43.260
  • deep relationships
  • 00:12:43.260 --> 00:12:44.270
  • in your life, because you go
  • 00:12:44.270 --> 00:12:47.040
  • into relationships so needy.
  • 00:12:47.090 --> 00:12:50.090
  • You're a taker, not a giver.
  • 00:12:52.090 --> 00:12:55.090
  • Paul says you got to
  • 00:12:55.090 --> 00:12:56.060
  • get past this.
  • 00:12:56.060 --> 00:12:57.080
  • A mature view of marriage,
  • 00:12:57.080 --> 00:12:58.150
  • a mature view of relationship,
  • 00:12:58.150 --> 00:13:00.070
  • a mature view
  • 00:13:00.070 --> 00:13:00.290
  • of Christian living,
  • 00:13:00.290 --> 00:13:02.070
  • being a follower of Christ,
  • 00:13:02.070 --> 00:13:03.010
  • looks like this.
  • 00:13:03.010 --> 00:13:03.250
  • Look at verse five.
  • 00:13:03.250 --> 00:13:05.090
  • He says,
  • 00:13:05.090 --> 00:13:05.270
  • "Don't deprive each other."
  • 00:13:05.270 --> 00:13:07.220
  • Don't deprive each other.
  • 00:13:07.220 --> 00:13:09.080
  • See, because when you go into
  • 00:13:09.080 --> 00:13:10.060
  • relationships led by desire
  • 00:13:10.060 --> 00:13:11.290
  • and you end up disappointed,
  • 00:13:11.290 --> 00:13:13.050
  • the next step is depravation.
  • 00:13:13.050 --> 00:13:16.020
  • Now because you didn't give me
  • 00:13:16.020 --> 00:13:17.040
  • what I expected, I'm going to
  • 00:13:17.040 --> 00:13:18.050
  • withhold from you what you need.
  • 00:13:18.050 --> 00:13:19.280
  • and it happens in marriages
  • 00:13:19.280 --> 00:13:20.250
  • all the time.
  • 00:13:21.000 --> 00:13:24.000
  • Sexual depravation,
  • 00:13:24.000 --> 00:13:25.250
  • emotional depravation.
  • 00:13:25.250 --> 00:13:27.170
  • He said stop depriving
  • 00:13:27.170 --> 00:13:29.030
  • each other.
  • 00:13:29.030 --> 00:13:30.180
  • He said there's an exception.
  • 00:13:30.180 --> 00:13:31.260
  • he's speaking here specifically
  • 00:13:31.260 --> 00:13:34.130
  • about sex but he says,
  • 00:13:34.130 --> 00:13:35.190
  • "If you want to agree together
  • 00:13:35.190 --> 00:13:38.070
  • for a time and devote yourselves
  • 00:13:38.070 --> 00:13:39.220
  • to prayer,"
  • 00:13:39.220 --> 00:13:40.120
  • look at verse five,
  • 00:13:40.120 --> 00:13:41.230
  • "then you can do it,
  • 00:13:41.230 --> 00:13:42.280
  • but make sure you come together
  • 00:13:42.280 --> 00:13:44.050
  • again so that Satan will not
  • 00:13:44.050 --> 00:13:45.070
  • tempt you because of your lack
  • 00:13:45.070 --> 00:13:46.210
  • of self control."
  • 00:13:46.210 --> 00:13:47.240
  • Verse six, he said,
  • 00:13:47.240 --> 00:13:48.280
  • "I say this as a concession,
  • 00:13:48.280 --> 00:13:50.130
  • not a command."
  • 00:13:50.130 --> 00:13:50.260
  • His expectation is in
  • 00:13:50.260 --> 00:13:52.200
  • a marriage, that if you're
  • 00:13:52.200 --> 00:13:54.040
  • coming to it for what you
  • 00:13:54.040 --> 00:13:54.260
  • can give, not what you can get,
  • 00:13:54.260 --> 00:13:55.220
  • and it's functioning in this way
  • 00:13:55.220 --> 00:13:57.160
  • where you're not going in
  • 00:13:57.160 --> 00:13:58.140
  • with a self-satisfying view
  • 00:13:58.140 --> 00:13:59.290
  • of sexuality and relationships,
  • 00:13:59.290 --> 00:14:02.120
  • if you're going into
  • 00:14:02.120 --> 00:14:03.070
  • it this way,
  • 00:14:03.070 --> 00:14:03.280
  • he said there's going to be
  • 00:14:03.280 --> 00:14:04.200
  • a continual passion.
  • 00:14:04.200 --> 00:14:06.180
  • And he said it'll be so strong
  • 00:14:06.180 --> 00:14:08.020
  • that if you do take time off,
  • 00:14:08.020 --> 00:14:10.000
  • you'll have to agree together
  • 00:14:10.000 --> 00:14:10.260
  • to do it.
  • 00:14:10.260 --> 00:14:12.100
  • And he said it doesn't even have
  • 00:14:12.100 --> 00:14:14.130
  • to last that long.
  • 00:14:14.130 --> 00:14:15.070
  • You can get right back to it.
  • 00:14:15.070 --> 00:14:16.270
  • He says you can take
  • 00:14:16.270 --> 00:14:17.260
  • a little prayer break if you
  • 00:14:17.260 --> 00:14:19.030
  • need to and get some Gatorade.
  • 00:14:19.030 --> 00:14:21.040
  • Now listen, I know this sounds
  • 00:14:21.040 --> 00:14:22.010
  • way far off from the way a lot
  • 00:14:22.010 --> 00:14:23.160
  • of you see your marriage
  • 00:14:23.160 --> 00:14:25.060
  • but you'd be amazed what happens
  • 00:14:26.040 --> 00:14:29.040
  • when you stop seeking
  • 00:14:29.040 --> 00:14:30.020
  • to satisfy yourself.
  • 00:14:30.040 --> 00:14:33.040
  • the ways that God can bless you,
  • 00:14:33.040 --> 00:14:35.070
  • Paul says
  • 00:14:35.070 --> 00:14:36.020
  • it's a beautiful thing.
  • 00:14:36.020 --> 00:14:37.220
  • And we'll talk about it
  • 00:14:37.220 --> 00:14:38.160
  • in the weeks to come.
  • 00:14:38.160 --> 00:14:39.100
  • But I got to stop for today.
  • 00:14:39.100 --> 00:14:41.030
  • I want to show you
  • 00:14:41.030 --> 00:14:41.260
  • one more thing.
  • 00:14:41.260 --> 00:14:43.060
  • And I hope this'll speak to
  • 00:14:43.060 --> 00:14:44.100
  • the heart of this series
  • 00:14:44.100 --> 00:14:45.130
  • and God's intention for you.
  • 00:14:45.130 --> 00:14:46.240
  • I want to close talking about
  • 00:14:46.240 --> 00:14:48.110
  • gifts and grace.
  • 00:14:48.110 --> 00:14:50.090
  • Gifts and grace.
  • 00:14:51.060 --> 00:14:54.060
  • It's very interesting how Paul
  • 00:14:54.060 --> 00:14:56.260
  • closes this particular section.
  • 00:14:56.260 --> 00:14:58.190
  • he answers their first question.
  • 00:14:58.190 --> 00:14:59.240
  • He says, "Hey, if you're single,
  • 00:14:59.240 --> 00:15:01.150
  • it's good.
  • 00:15:01.150 --> 00:15:02.100
  • If you're married it's good.
  • 00:15:02.100 --> 00:15:04.160
  • It's how you approach either one
  • 00:15:04.160 --> 00:15:07.010
  • that determines what it'll be
  • 00:15:07.010 --> 00:15:08.080
  • in your life."
  • 00:15:08.080 --> 00:15:09.030
  • Look, verse seven,
  • 00:15:09.030 --> 00:15:09.210
  • he says, "Now I wish that all
  • 00:15:10.040 --> 00:15:13.040
  • of you were as I am."
  • 00:15:13.040 --> 00:15:14.280
  • Who says that?
  • 00:15:16.100 --> 00:15:19.100
  • Paul does.
  • 00:15:19.100 --> 00:15:21.270
  • And I find that striking
  • 00:15:21.270 --> 00:15:22.280
  • in a culture where everybody
  • 00:15:22.280 --> 00:15:23.270
  • is all about getting married
  • 00:15:23.270 --> 00:15:25.040
  • and finding the one.
  • 00:15:25.040 --> 00:15:26.040
  • Paul's like, "Hey look, it'd be
  • 00:15:26.040 --> 00:15:27.040
  • great if you were all content
  • 00:15:27.040 --> 00:15:29.040
  • enough in Christ that you didn't
  • 00:15:29.040 --> 00:15:30.190
  • have to get married, like me.
  • 00:15:30.270 --> 00:15:33.270
  • It'd be great if you were
  • 00:15:33.270 --> 00:15:35.000
  • all awesome like me."
  • 00:15:36.090 --> 00:15:39.090
  • "I wish you were all like
  • 00:15:39.090 --> 00:15:40.160
  • I am," because there is a way
  • 00:15:40.160 --> 00:15:42.040
  • in which he says,
  • 00:15:42.040 --> 00:15:43.130
  • "My singleness gives a focus
  • 00:15:43.130 --> 00:15:44.080
  • to my life,"
  • 00:15:44.080 --> 00:15:45.270
  • and it's very complicated
  • 00:15:45.270 --> 00:15:47.190
  • to be in a relationship
  • 00:15:47.190 --> 00:15:48.200
  • with another human being
  • 00:15:48.200 --> 00:15:49.250
  • and become one.
  • 00:15:49.250 --> 00:15:50.280
  • He says -- now this is
  • 00:15:50.280 --> 00:15:51.250
  • powerful -- he says, "But each
  • 00:15:51.250 --> 00:15:54.230
  • of you has your own gift
  • 00:15:54.230 --> 00:15:55.210
  • from God."
  • 00:15:55.210 --> 00:15:56.210
  • Stop envying somebody
  • 00:15:56.210 --> 00:15:58.210
  • else's situation.
  • 00:15:58.210 --> 00:16:01.000
  • Each of you has your own gift
  • 00:16:01.000 --> 00:16:03.010
  • from God.
  • 00:16:03.010 --> 00:16:03.220
  • One has this gift.
  • 00:16:03.220 --> 00:16:05.250
  • Another has that.
  • 00:16:05.250 --> 00:16:08.030
  • Usually when we talk about
  • 00:16:08.030 --> 00:16:08.290
  • spiritual gifts in the church,
  • 00:16:08.290 --> 00:16:10.280
  • we talk about preaching
  • 00:16:10.280 --> 00:16:11.250
  • and singing and serving
  • 00:16:11.250 --> 00:16:13.170
  • and that's what we talk about
  • 00:16:13.170 --> 00:16:15.100
  • when we say spiritual gifts.
  • 00:16:15.100 --> 00:16:17.090
  • But Paul says,
  • 00:16:17.090 --> 00:16:18.290
  • "Look, if you're going to
  • 00:16:18.290 --> 00:16:19.260
  • be married, you need to
  • 00:16:19.260 --> 00:16:20.200
  • have a gift.
  • 00:16:20.200 --> 00:16:22.170
  • If you're going to be single,
  • 00:16:22.170 --> 00:16:23.180
  • you're going to need to have
  • 00:16:23.180 --> 00:16:24.230
  • a gift."
  • 00:16:24.230 --> 00:16:26.000
  • And some of you in this
  • 00:16:26.000 --> 00:16:27.040
  • season of your life,
  • 00:16:27.040 --> 00:16:29.020
  • you've been given
  • 00:16:29.020 --> 00:16:29.230
  • the gift of singleness.
  • 00:16:29.230 --> 00:16:30.220
  • I know, I know,
  • 00:16:30.220 --> 00:16:31.150
  • it wasn't on your registry.
  • 00:16:31.150 --> 00:16:34.060
  • It's like, "God, can I please
  • 00:16:34.060 --> 00:16:34.290
  • exchange this gift
  • 00:16:34.290 --> 00:16:35.220
  • of singleness?
  • 00:16:35.220 --> 00:16:36.230
  • This is not what I asked for
  • 00:16:36.230 --> 00:16:38.110
  • for Christmas."
  • 00:16:38.110 --> 00:16:40.060
  • Some of you have
  • 00:16:40.060 --> 00:16:40.290
  • the gift of marriage.
  • 00:16:40.290 --> 00:16:43.120
  • I know, I know.
  • 00:16:43.120 --> 00:16:43.290
  • Some of you, when you opened up
  • 00:16:43.290 --> 00:16:44.270
  • the package it didn't look like
  • 00:16:44.270 --> 00:16:46.050
  • you thought it looked when
  • 00:16:46.050 --> 00:16:47.040
  • you were looking at it when you
  • 00:16:47.040 --> 00:16:48.190
  • ordered it on Amazon.com.
  • 00:16:50.200 --> 00:16:53.200
  • But he says it's a gift.
  • 00:16:53.200 --> 00:16:54.180
  • Now watch this, it's deep.
  • 00:16:54.180 --> 00:16:56.010
  • The word gift in this passage
  • 00:16:56.010 --> 00:16:58.000
  • is a Greek word.
  • 00:16:58.000 --> 00:16:59.000
  • The Greek word is charisma.
  • 00:16:59.000 --> 00:17:01.240
  • Charisma in this sense does not
  • 00:17:01.240 --> 00:17:03.100
  • mean a personality type.
  • 00:17:03.100 --> 00:17:05.020
  • Charisma literally means
  • 00:17:05.020 --> 00:17:07.190
  • gift of grace.
  • 00:17:08.060 --> 00:17:11.060
  • Gift of grace.
  • 00:17:11.060 --> 00:17:14.000
  • He says, "Look.
  • 00:17:14.000 --> 00:17:14.250
  • There are some of you in
  • 00:17:14.250 --> 00:17:15.200
  • the church and you're married
  • 00:17:15.200 --> 00:17:16.220
  • right now, and that's a gift."
  • 00:17:16.230 --> 00:17:19.230
  • That's a gift.
  • 00:17:19.230 --> 00:17:21.020
  • He who finds a wife
  • 00:17:21.020 --> 00:17:22.160
  • finds a good thing.
  • 00:17:22.160 --> 00:17:23.100
  • It's a gift.
  • 00:17:23.100 --> 00:17:24.220
  • He says, "Some of you are single
  • 00:17:24.220 --> 00:17:26.100
  • right now and that is also
  • 00:17:26.100 --> 00:17:28.030
  • a gift."
  • 00:17:28.030 --> 00:17:29.160
  • May not feel always like
  • 00:17:29.160 --> 00:17:30.200
  • a gift but it is a gift.
  • 00:17:30.200 --> 00:17:33.060
  • It's a gift.
  • 00:17:33.060 --> 00:17:35.180
  • But this is what blew my mind.
  • 00:17:35.180 --> 00:17:37.280
  • He said,
  • 00:17:37.280 --> 00:17:38.160
  • "Whether you're married
  • 00:17:38.160 --> 00:17:40.000
  • or single, the real gift is not
  • 00:17:40.230 --> 00:17:43.230
  • the marriage or the singleness.
  • 00:17:43.230 --> 00:17:46.000
  • That is a gift.
  • 00:17:46.000 --> 00:17:47.250
  • But it's not the greatest gift.
  • 00:17:47.250 --> 00:17:50.110
  • The greatest gift that God gives
  • 00:17:51.070 --> 00:17:54.070
  • is called grace."
  • 00:17:54.220 --> 00:17:57.220
  • He says, "One person
  • 00:17:57.220 --> 00:17:58.190
  • has one gift, one has another.
  • 00:17:58.190 --> 00:18:01.030
  • But no matter which gift
  • 00:18:01.030 --> 00:18:02.090
  • you have,
  • 00:18:02.090 --> 00:18:03.000
  • here's what you really need.
  • 00:18:03.000 --> 00:18:03.270
  • You're going to need grace
  • 00:18:03.270 --> 00:18:05.280
  • to do this right."
  • 00:18:06.020 --> 00:18:09.020
  • If you're going to be married,
  • 00:18:09.020 --> 00:18:10.090
  • it's going to take grace.
  • 00:18:10.130 --> 00:18:13.130
  • If you're going to come home
  • 00:18:13.130 --> 00:18:14.090
  • to the same person night
  • 00:18:14.090 --> 00:18:16.050
  • after night and year after year
  • 00:18:16.050 --> 00:18:17.240
  • and good times and bad times
  • 00:18:17.240 --> 00:18:19.250
  • and lean times and fat times,
  • 00:18:19.250 --> 00:18:21.290
  • it's going to take grace.
  • 00:18:21.290 --> 00:18:24.180
  • Come on.
  • 00:18:24.180 --> 00:18:25.120
  • There are marriages
  • 00:18:25.120 --> 00:18:26.180
  • in our church today that need
  • 00:18:26.180 --> 00:18:27.260
  • grace if they're going to work.
  • 00:18:28.000 --> 00:18:31.000
  • We need grace to do this right.
  • 00:18:31.000 --> 00:18:33.080
  • It is not easy
  • 00:18:33.080 --> 00:18:34.190
  • to stay committed.
  • 00:18:34.190 --> 00:18:35.190
  • It is not easy to be faithful.
  • 00:18:35.190 --> 00:18:37.210
  • It is not easy to be selfless.
  • 00:18:37.210 --> 00:18:40.020
  • We need some grace.
  • 00:18:44.010 --> 00:18:47.010
  • And if you're single,
  • 00:18:47.010 --> 00:18:47.270
  • I know there are some times
  • 00:18:47.270 --> 00:18:49.140
  • where you're crying at night
  • 00:18:49.140 --> 00:18:51.190
  • because there's nobody for you
  • 00:18:51.190 --> 00:18:52.240
  • to watch Netflix with right now.
  • 00:18:52.240 --> 00:18:55.200
  • I'm not trivializing it.
  • 00:18:55.200 --> 00:18:56.250
  • I'm just trying to bring it to
  • 00:18:56.250 --> 00:18:57.220
  • a practical level.
  • 00:18:57.220 --> 00:18:59.200
  • It's not all the time some
  • 00:18:59.200 --> 00:19:00.230
  • deep thing is just like,
  • 00:19:00.230 --> 00:19:01.210
  • "Man, I'd like somebody to do
  • 00:19:01.210 --> 00:19:03.030
  • something with on a Saturday."
  • 00:19:03.030 --> 00:19:05.270
  • But did you know that the same
  • 00:19:05.270 --> 00:19:07.170
  • grace that God gives to somebody
  • 00:19:08.020 --> 00:19:11.020
  • for marriage is the same grace
  • 00:19:11.020 --> 00:19:13.210
  • that He will give you as a gift
  • 00:19:13.210 --> 00:19:15.070
  • in your singleness,
  • 00:19:15.070 --> 00:19:17.010
  • in your times of loneliness,
  • 00:19:17.010 --> 00:19:19.050
  • in your times of feeling like
  • 00:19:19.050 --> 00:19:20.110
  • you're never going to
  • 00:19:20.110 --> 00:19:21.070
  • have somebody?
  • 00:19:21.070 --> 00:19:22.000
  • It's the same grace.
  • 00:19:24.270 --> 00:19:27.270
  • So watch this.
  • 00:19:27.270 --> 00:19:28.200
  • God told me to tell you
  • 00:19:28.200 --> 00:19:31.030
  • that the real gift is grace.
  • 00:19:31.030 --> 00:19:33.060
  • some of you are so focused on
  • 00:19:33.060 --> 00:19:34.140
  • the gift that you want from God
  • 00:19:34.140 --> 00:19:36.270
  • you're missing the grace
  • 00:19:36.270 --> 00:19:38.080
  • that He's already given you.
  • 00:19:45.000 --> 00:19:48.000
  • I know some of you want a man,
  • 00:19:48.000 --> 00:19:49.020
  • some of you want a woman.
  • 00:19:49.020 --> 00:19:49.260
  • That's awesome.
  • 00:19:49.260 --> 00:19:50.190
  • It's good, it's good, it's good.
  • 00:19:50.190 --> 00:19:52.200
  • But don't miss the grace
  • 00:19:52.200 --> 00:19:54.030
  • because you're so focused on
  • 00:19:54.030 --> 00:19:55.150
  • the gift you think you want.
  • 00:19:55.160 --> 00:19:58.160
  • I know some of you have
  • 00:19:58.160 --> 00:19:59.080
  • some things in your marriage
  • 00:19:59.080 --> 00:20:00.050
  • right now, some real issues.
  • 00:20:00.050 --> 00:20:02.220
  • But the real gift isn't that God
  • 00:20:02.220 --> 00:20:04.210
  • would fix all the issues
  • 00:20:04.210 --> 00:20:05.290
  • about your spouse.
  • 00:20:05.290 --> 00:20:07.110
  • The real gift is that God
  • 00:20:07.110 --> 00:20:08.090
  • would give you the grace
  • 00:20:08.090 --> 00:20:09.210
  • in the midst of the issues
  • 00:20:09.210 --> 00:20:10.290
  • to trust Him and be faithful.
  • 00:20:10.290 --> 00:20:13.080
  • The gift is grace.
  • 00:20:13.130 --> 00:20:16.130
  • And I don't think there's
  • 00:20:16.130 --> 00:20:17.150
  • anybody in the room today
  • 00:20:17.150 --> 00:20:19.110
  • who wouldn't say before
  • 00:20:19.110 --> 00:20:21.180
  • the Lord, "I need
  • 00:20:21.270 --> 00:20:24.270
  • this gift of grace."
  • 00:20:24.270 --> 00:20:27.040
  • If we're going to do it right,
  • 00:20:27.040 --> 00:20:28.220
  • if we're going to do
  • 00:20:28.220 --> 00:20:29.150
  • it God's way,
  • 00:20:29.150 --> 00:20:30.100
  • it's going to take grace.
  • 00:20:30.100 --> 00:20:31.110
  • Anybody in this place who
  • 00:20:31.110 --> 00:20:32.070
  • needs the grace of God
  • 00:20:32.070 --> 00:20:33.150
  • for the season and situation
  • 00:20:33.150 --> 00:20:35.010
  • you're in today,
  • 00:20:35.010 --> 00:20:35.140
  • I want you to stand on your feet
  • 00:20:35.140 --> 00:20:36.130
  • right now at all of
  • 00:20:36.130 --> 00:20:37.080
  • our locations.
  • 00:20:37.080 --> 00:20:38.000
  • If you need grace.
  • 00:20:38.000 --> 00:20:39.190
  • If you don't need any grace,
  • 00:20:39.190 --> 00:20:41.110
  • if you got it covered,
  • 00:20:41.110 --> 00:20:42.090
  • if you're good --
  • 00:20:42.090 --> 00:20:44.020
  • but if you need grace,
  • 00:20:44.020 --> 00:20:44.240
  • stand on your feet today.
  • 00:20:46.030 --> 00:20:49.030
  • Come on.
  • 00:20:49.030 --> 00:20:49.260
  • Grace for the temptations
  • 00:20:49.260 --> 00:20:51.100
  • that you're facing.
  • 00:20:51.100 --> 00:20:52.230
  • Grace for the parts of your past
  • 00:20:52.230 --> 00:20:54.080
  • that keep catching back up
  • 00:20:54.080 --> 00:20:55.120
  • with you again.
  • 00:20:55.120 --> 00:20:56.090
  • Grace.
  • 00:20:56.090 --> 00:20:58.020
  • Grace.
  • 00:20:58.020 --> 00:21:00.100
  • God's great grace
  • 00:21:00.100 --> 00:21:03.040
  • is available today to everyone
  • 00:21:03.040 --> 00:21:05.170
  • who will receive it.
  • 00:21:05.200 --> 00:21:08.200
  • Grace.
  • 00:21:08.200 --> 00:21:09.280
  • Grace.
  • 00:21:09.280 --> 00:21:10.280
  • I know we talked about standards
  • 00:21:10.280 --> 00:21:12.100
  • but you need grace for the times
  • 00:21:12.100 --> 00:21:13.180
  • that you fall short of
  • 00:21:13.180 --> 00:21:14.260
  • the standard,
  • 00:21:14.260 --> 00:21:15.210
  • for all have sinned
  • 00:21:15.210 --> 00:21:16.200
  • and fallen short of the glory
  • 00:21:16.200 --> 00:21:17.160
  • of God.
  • 00:21:17.160 --> 00:21:18.060
  • So the real gift is grace.
  • 00:21:19.070 --> 00:21:22.070
  • Grace.
  • 00:21:22.070 --> 00:21:24.220
  • Grace.
  • 00:21:24.220 --> 00:21:26.180
  • You're waiting on something to
  • 00:21:26.180 --> 00:21:27.130
  • change in your life right now,
  • 00:21:27.130 --> 00:21:28.280
  • to change in your home.
  • 00:21:28.280 --> 00:21:30.130
  • But in the mean time,
  • 00:21:30.130 --> 00:21:31.030
  • there's a gift called grace.
  • 00:21:31.110 --> 00:21:34.110
  • It's available to you.
  • 00:21:34.110 --> 00:21:36.220
  • It's available.
  • 00:21:36.220 --> 00:21:37.120
  • It's yours for the taking.
  • 00:21:37.120 --> 00:21:39.040
  • Right now.
  • 00:21:39.040 --> 00:21:40.090
  • Right here.
  • 00:21:40.090 --> 00:21:42.230
  • You don't have to wait till
  • 00:21:42.230 --> 00:21:43.150
  • you have a relationship with
  • 00:21:43.150 --> 00:21:44.160
  • another person to have grace.
  • 00:21:44.160 --> 00:21:46.010
  • His grace is sufficient.
  • 00:21:46.010 --> 00:21:47.220
  • One time Paul had an issue
  • 00:21:47.220 --> 00:21:49.140
  • that he was praying about.
  • 00:21:49.140 --> 00:21:50.220
  • And he prayed about it
  • 00:21:50.220 --> 00:21:51.130
  • three different times.
  • 00:21:51.130 --> 00:21:53.150
  • He didn't even say what
  • 00:21:53.150 --> 00:21:55.000
  • the issue was.
  • 00:21:55.000 --> 00:21:55.270
  • He simply calls it the thorn
  • 00:21:55.270 --> 00:21:57.220
  • in his flesh.
  • 00:21:57.220 --> 00:22:00.150
  • I wonder if he didn't name it
  • 00:22:00.150 --> 00:22:01.110
  • because it was so humiliating
  • 00:22:01.110 --> 00:22:03.040
  • to him that he didn't want to
  • 00:22:03.040 --> 00:22:04.050
  • specifically say what it was.
  • 00:22:04.050 --> 00:22:05.220
  • I don't know.
  • 00:22:05.220 --> 00:22:07.180
  • But whatever it was,
  • 00:22:07.180 --> 00:22:08.160
  • he asked God to take it away.
  • 00:22:08.160 --> 00:22:10.180
  • In other words, he asked God
  • 00:22:10.180 --> 00:22:11.160
  • to fix the situation,
  • 00:22:11.160 --> 00:22:13.110
  • and that's where we start.
  • 00:22:13.110 --> 00:22:14.110
  • Fix the situation, God.
  • 00:22:14.110 --> 00:22:15.100
  • Fix the situation.
  • 00:22:15.100 --> 00:22:18.080
  • And three times God said no.
  • 00:22:18.130 --> 00:22:21.130
  • Nope.
  • 00:22:21.130 --> 00:22:23.090
  • I'm gon' give you a gift
  • 00:22:23.090 --> 00:22:24.030
  • but not the one you're asking
  • 00:22:24.030 --> 00:22:24.280
  • for right now.
  • 00:22:24.280 --> 00:22:26.170
  • Because sometimes you don't know
  • 00:22:26.170 --> 00:22:27.160
  • what you need.
  • 00:22:27.160 --> 00:22:29.180
  • So I'm gon' give you a gift
  • 00:22:29.180 --> 00:22:31.230
  • and the gift is called grace.
  • 00:22:31.230 --> 00:22:34.160
  • He said, "My grace is sufficient
  • 00:22:34.160 --> 00:22:36.200
  • for you, and my strength is made
  • 00:22:36.200 --> 00:22:38.220
  • perfect in your weakness."
  • 00:22:38.220 --> 00:22:41.030
  • So I came today not to offer you
  • 00:22:41.030 --> 00:22:42.110
  • in this series a lot of
  • 00:22:42.110 --> 00:22:43.130
  • easy solutions.
  • 00:22:43.130 --> 00:22:46.000
  • I don't know
  • 00:22:46.000 --> 00:22:47.020
  • how to lose a guy in ten days
  • 00:22:47.020 --> 00:22:48.080
  • or how to get a guy in ten days.
  • 00:22:48.080 --> 00:22:49.130
  • I don't know.
  • 00:22:49.130 --> 00:22:51.010
  • I don't know.
  • 00:22:51.010 --> 00:22:51.220
  • I don't know.
  • 00:22:51.220 --> 00:22:52.220
  • Seven easy steps to fix
  • 00:22:52.220 --> 00:22:53.180
  • your marriage by Monday.
  • 00:22:53.180 --> 00:22:54.130
  • I don't know.
  • 00:22:54.130 --> 00:22:56.030
  • Read the magazine.
  • 00:22:56.030 --> 00:22:56.230
  • I don't do that.
  • 00:22:56.230 --> 00:22:59.030
  • I came today to offer you
  • 00:22:59.030 --> 00:23:01.220
  • the inexhaustible supply of
  • 00:23:01.220 --> 00:23:02.250
  • God's grace for whatever season
  • 00:23:02.250 --> 00:23:05.090
  • and whatever struggle
  • 00:23:05.090 --> 00:23:06.120
  • you're facing.
  • 00:23:06.120 --> 00:23:07.140
  • If you want that grace,
  • 00:23:07.140 --> 00:23:08.240
  • would you slip your hands
  • 00:23:08.240 --> 00:23:10.090
  • in the air right now
  • 00:23:10.090 --> 00:23:11.120
  • if you want that grace?
  • 00:23:11.150 --> 00:23:14.150
  • And would you just say out loud
  • 00:23:14.150 --> 00:23:15.250
  • in this moment of ministry,
  • 00:23:15.250 --> 00:23:17.280
  • "I need your grace Lord."
  • 00:23:17.280 --> 00:23:19.070
  • - Congregation: I need your
  • 00:23:19.070 --> 00:23:20.020
  • grace Lord.
  • 00:23:20.020 --> 00:23:20.280
  • - Say it again.
  • 00:23:20.280 --> 00:23:21.200
  • I need your grace Lord.
  • 00:23:21.200 --> 00:23:22.240
  • - Congregation: I need your
  • 00:23:22.240 --> 00:23:23.140
  • grace Lord.
  • 00:23:23.140 --> 00:23:24.080
  • - I need your grace Lord.
  • 00:23:24.080 --> 00:23:25.080
  • - Congregation: I need your
  • 00:23:25.080 --> 00:23:26.010
  • grace Lord.
  • 00:23:26.010 --> 00:23:26.250
  • - With your hands still lifted
  • 00:23:26.250 --> 00:23:27.180
  • high, now say, "I receive
  • 00:23:27.180 --> 00:23:28.100
  • your grace Lord."
  • 00:23:28.100 --> 00:23:29.040
  • - Congregation: I receive your
  • 00:23:29.040 --> 00:23:29.280
  • grace Lord.
  • 00:23:29.280 --> 00:23:30.230
  • - I receive your grace.
  • 00:23:30.230 --> 00:23:31.230
  • - Congregation: I receive
  • 00:23:31.230 --> 00:23:32.150
  • your grace.
  • 00:23:32.150 --> 00:23:33.090
  • - I receive your grace.
  • 00:23:33.090 --> 00:23:34.050
  • - Congregation: I receive
  • 00:23:34.050 --> 00:23:34.230
  • your grace.
  • 00:23:34.230 --> 00:23:35.140
  • - In Jesus' name.
  • 00:23:35.140 --> 00:23:36.100
  • - Congregation: In Jesus' name.
  • 00:23:36.100 --> 00:23:37.070
  • - Now God, we thank you
  • 00:23:37.070 --> 00:23:38.090
  • for great grace.
  • 00:23:38.090 --> 00:23:39.170
  • We thank you for the great grace
  • 00:23:39.170 --> 00:23:40.150
  • that breaks chains of addiction.
  • 00:23:40.150 --> 00:23:43.020
  • We thank you that nobody in here
  • 00:23:43.020 --> 00:23:44.030
  • today is dealing with a sexual
  • 00:23:44.030 --> 00:23:45.210
  • dysfunction or a relational
  • 00:23:45.210 --> 00:23:46.250
  • failure that is greater
  • 00:23:46.250 --> 00:23:48.010
  • than your grace.
  • 00:23:48.010 --> 00:23:49.000
  • We declare you grace is greater.
  • 00:23:49.000 --> 00:23:50.260
  • Your grace is greater.
  • 00:23:50.260 --> 00:23:51.270
  • Your grace is greater.
  • 00:23:51.270 --> 00:23:53.060
  • Your grace is greater.
  • 00:23:53.060 --> 00:23:54.270
  • Your grace is greater.
  • 00:23:54.270 --> 00:23:55.220
  • The blood is stronger.
  • 00:23:55.220 --> 00:23:57.000
  • The blood is stronger.
  • 00:23:57.000 --> 00:23:58.170
  • The blood is stronger.
  • 00:23:58.170 --> 00:23:59.250
  • Your name is higher.
  • 00:23:59.250 --> 00:24:01.080
  • Your name is higher.
  • 00:24:01.080 --> 00:24:03.150
  • Your name is higher.
  • 00:24:03.150 --> 00:24:04.170
  • - Alright, let's interact
  • 00:24:07.190 --> 00:24:08.230
  • for a moment.
  • 00:24:08.230 --> 00:24:09.190
  • Just pretend like
  • 00:24:09.190 --> 00:24:10.040
  • I'm there with you.
  • 00:24:10.040 --> 00:24:10.290
  • Have you ever experienced
  • 00:24:10.290 --> 00:24:12.290
  • a challenging relationship?
  • 00:24:12.290 --> 00:24:15.030
  • Holly, do this, do this.
  • 00:24:15.030 --> 00:24:17.080
  • Okay, be careful how you respond
  • 00:24:17.080 --> 00:24:18.270
  • if you're sitting
  • 00:24:18.270 --> 00:24:19.110
  • in your living room
  • 00:24:19.110 --> 00:24:19.270
  • watching this with your spouse
  • 00:24:19.270 --> 00:24:21.180
  • or someone that you love.
  • 00:24:21.180 --> 00:24:23.170
  • the truth is relationships
  • 00:24:23.170 --> 00:24:25.120
  • are challenging by design.
  • 00:24:25.120 --> 00:24:27.160
  • It's how God grows us,
  • 00:24:27.160 --> 00:24:29.030
  • but it's He's intention for you
  • 00:24:29.030 --> 00:24:31.090
  • to do more than just survive
  • 00:24:31.090 --> 00:24:32.160
  • your relationships.
  • 00:24:32.160 --> 00:24:34.020
  • I believe He wants you
  • 00:24:34.020 --> 00:24:35.070
  • to thrive in them,
  • 00:24:35.070 --> 00:24:36.030
  • and He's Word
  • 00:24:36.030 --> 00:24:36.220
  • gives us the tools
  • 00:24:36.220 --> 00:24:37.150
  • to make that possible.
  • 00:24:37.150 --> 00:24:38.270
  • So, today, I have special
  • 00:24:38.270 --> 00:24:40.270
  • most requested resource
  • 00:24:40.270 --> 00:24:42.260
  • that I want to send to you.
  • 00:24:42.260 --> 00:24:44.010
  • It's called, "Meant to Be."
  • 00:24:44.010 --> 00:24:45.270
  • It will show you
  • 00:24:45.270 --> 00:24:46.180
  • some of the Bible's
  • 00:24:46.180 --> 00:24:47.140
  • best kept secrets
  • 00:24:47.140 --> 00:24:50.030
  • about sex, shh,
  • 00:24:50.030 --> 00:24:52.090
  • marriage, and being single.
  • 00:24:52.090 --> 00:24:54.110
  • - It's so good,
  • 00:24:54.110 --> 00:24:55.100
  • and it's really not
  • 00:24:55.100 --> 00:24:56.100
  • just a relationship series.
  • 00:24:56.100 --> 00:24:58.140
  • This resource truly
  • 00:24:58.140 --> 00:25:00.030
  • has the power
  • 00:25:00.030 --> 00:25:00.230
  • to impact your life.
  • 00:25:00.230 --> 00:25:01.230
  • We've heard stories of marriages
  • 00:25:01.230 --> 00:25:03.140
  • that were restored,
  • 00:25:03.140 --> 00:25:04.230
  • and single people that learned
  • 00:25:04.230 --> 00:25:06.090
  • to embrace the season
  • 00:25:06.090 --> 00:25:07.130
  • that they're in instead
  • 00:25:07.130 --> 00:25:08.160
  • of focusing on the relationships
  • 00:25:08.160 --> 00:25:10.000
  • that they don't have.
  • 00:25:10.000 --> 00:25:11.110
  • I know that this series
  • 00:25:11.110 --> 00:25:12.210
  • is going to help you
  • 00:25:12.210 --> 00:25:14.020
  • like it has so many already.
  • 00:25:14.020 --> 00:25:16.040
  • - And we want to help you,
  • 00:25:16.040 --> 00:25:17.040
  • we're here to help to you.
  • 00:25:17.040 --> 00:25:18.000
  • so, I'm going to send you
  • 00:25:18.000 --> 00:25:18.280
  • this resource "Meant to be"
  • 00:25:18.280 --> 00:25:20.200
  • with your gift of any amount
  • 00:25:20.200 --> 00:25:22.000
  • to the ministry today.
  • 00:25:22.000 --> 00:25:23.290
  • Just go online right now
  • 00:25:23.290 --> 00:25:25.160
  • or call the number
  • 00:25:25.160 --> 00:25:26.230
  • on the screen right now,
  • 00:25:26.230 --> 00:25:28.210
  • and request your copy
  • 00:25:28.210 --> 00:25:29.230
  • of "Meant to Be".
  • 00:25:29.230 --> 00:25:31.030
  • Say, "I want it,"
  • 00:25:31.030 --> 00:25:32.020
  • and we'll get it out
  • 00:25:32.020 --> 00:25:32.290
  • to you right away.
  • 00:25:32.290 --> 00:25:33.250
  • Here's some more info as well as
  • 00:25:33.250 --> 00:25:35.180
  • some additional resources
  • 00:25:35.180 --> 00:25:36.220
  • - ANNOUNCER: When it comes
  • 00:25:38.200 --> 00:25:39.100
  • to seeking advice
  • 00:25:39.100 --> 00:25:40.280
  • about relationships, marriage,
  • 00:25:40.280 --> 00:25:41.230
  • and sex, we tend to look
  • 00:25:41.230 --> 00:25:43.060
  • in all the wrong places.
  • 00:25:43.060 --> 00:25:45.060
  • The world claims
  • 00:25:45.060 --> 00:25:45.220
  • to have the answers,
  • 00:25:45.220 --> 00:25:46.250
  • but maybe we've been focusing
  • 00:25:46.250 --> 00:25:47.260
  • on the wrong problem all along.
  • 00:25:47.260 --> 00:25:50.100
  • In our series, "Meant to Be",
  • 00:25:50.100 --> 00:25:52.010
  • Pastor Steven Furtick
  • 00:25:52.010 --> 00:25:53.030
  • has open conversations
  • 00:25:53.030 --> 00:25:54.200
  • to help us uncover
  • 00:25:54.200 --> 00:25:56.030
  • the Bible's best kept secrets
  • 00:25:56.030 --> 00:25:57.140
  • about sex, marriage,
  • 00:25:57.140 --> 00:25:58.180
  • and being single.
  • 00:25:58.180 --> 00:25:59.290
  • - Most of the emphasis,
  • 00:25:59.290 --> 00:26:01.130
  • when you talk about dating,
  • 00:26:01.130 --> 00:26:02.230
  • and marriage, and singleness,
  • 00:26:02.230 --> 00:26:04.040
  • in culture seems to be
  • 00:26:04.040 --> 00:26:05.060
  • on finding the right one.
  • 00:26:05.060 --> 00:26:07.100
  • Most of the emphasis,
  • 00:26:07.100 --> 00:26:08.220
  • when you come to the scripture,
  • 00:26:08.220 --> 00:26:10.010
  • tends to be on being
  • 00:26:10.010 --> 00:26:11.220
  • the right one.
  • 00:26:11.220 --> 00:26:13.040
  • - For your gift of any amount
  • 00:26:13.040 --> 00:26:14.070
  • we'll send you
  • 00:26:14.070 --> 00:26:14.260
  • the five-part
  • 00:26:14.260 --> 00:26:15.140
  • Meant To Be series,
  • 00:26:15.140 --> 00:26:16.190
  • which includes a message
  • 00:26:16.190 --> 00:26:17.240
  • with Pastor Steven
  • 00:26:17.240 --> 00:26:18.190
  • and his wife Holly,
  • 00:26:18.190 --> 00:26:19.290
  • where they share
  • 00:26:19.290 --> 00:26:20.190
  • personal examples
  • 00:26:20.190 --> 00:26:21.140
  • and scriptural insight on how
  • 00:26:21.140 --> 00:26:23.110
  • we can invite God to work
  • 00:26:23.110 --> 00:26:24.140
  • in our everyday
  • 00:26:24.140 --> 00:26:25.050
  • relationship challenges.
  • 00:26:25.050 --> 00:26:26.270
  • Pastor Steven also explains
  • 00:26:26.270 --> 00:26:29.020
  • the unnecessary complications
  • 00:26:29.020 --> 00:26:30.280
  • that sidetrack us
  • 00:26:30.280 --> 00:26:31.270
  • in relationships,
  • 00:26:31.270 --> 00:26:33.050
  • and he shows us
  • 00:26:33.050 --> 00:26:34.060
  • what is truly meant to be
  • 00:26:34.060 --> 00:26:35.120
  • in our lives
  • 00:26:35.120 --> 00:26:36.130
  • when we have Jesus
  • 00:26:36.130 --> 00:26:37.060
  • as our foundation.
  • 00:26:37.060 --> 00:26:38.190
  • - I've been told all my life
  • 00:26:38.190 --> 00:26:39.190
  • to put Jesus first,
  • 00:26:39.190 --> 00:26:40.200
  • but that doesn't work,
  • 00:26:40.200 --> 00:26:42.140
  • because that separates him out
  • 00:26:42.140 --> 00:26:43.140
  • from everything else.
  • 00:26:43.140 --> 00:26:45.130
  • Live as if Jesus
  • 00:26:45.130 --> 00:26:47.220
  • was not first on your list,
  • 00:26:47.220 --> 00:26:49.290
  • but that He was
  • 00:26:49.290 --> 00:26:50.220
  • the center of your world.
  • 00:26:50.220 --> 00:26:53.010
  • - Visit us online
  • 00:26:53.010 --> 00:26:54.040
  • at stevenfurtick.com,
  • 00:26:54.040 --> 00:26:55.200
  • or call us at the number
  • 00:26:55.200 --> 00:26:56.180
  • on your screen
  • 00:26:56.180 --> 00:26:57.130
  • to get your copy
  • 00:26:57.130 --> 00:26:58.060
  • - Ustoppable God
  • 00:27:02.080 --> 00:27:03.050
  • Let Your glory go
  • 00:27:03.050 --> 00:27:04.200
  • On and on
  • 00:27:05.230 --> 00:27:08.230
  • Impossible things
  • 00:27:08.230 --> 00:27:10.140
  • In Your name
  • 00:27:10.140 --> 00:27:11.100
  • Unstoppable God
  • 00:27:15.270 --> 00:27:17.160
  • Let Your glory go
  • 00:27:17.160 --> 00:27:19.080
  • On and on
  • 00:27:20.100 --> 00:27:23.100
  • Impossible things
  • 00:27:23.100 --> 00:27:25.000
  • In Your name
  • 00:27:25.000 --> 00:27:25.280