The Minimalist Home Part 2 | TBN

The Minimalist Home Part 2

Watch The Minimalist Home Part 2
February 13, 2021
27:29

Connect with Skip Heitzig presents God’s Word in a relaxed and relevant way with topical and verse-by-verse studies.

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The Minimalist Home Part 2

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  • ♪♪♪
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  • Scott Dooley: Welcome to"Connect with Skip Heitzig."
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  • This is Scott Dooley.
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  • Should the top priority of asingle person be to get married?
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  • Can a smart home also be aminimalist home with just
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  • one occupant?
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  • Why is it that singleness issometimes considered less
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  • acceptable than marriage?
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  • Can the single life bea full, enriching, and
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  • positive experience?
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  • Perhaps you've lost your mate,or you're still waiting
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  • to find one.
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  • Or maybe you're happyto stay single.
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  • Today, let's consider singlenessand celibacy in light
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  • of Scripture.
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  • Now, let's join Skip Heitzig.
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  • ♪♪♪
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  • Pastor Skip Heitzig: TheSanhedrin rules required that
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  • if you're gonna be a votingmember you have to be married.
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  • What we do know is Paul at thispoint is single, and he is
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  • living a celibate lifestyle,and he's okay with that.
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  • And he just wants the CorinthianChristians to know that,
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  • if you're single.
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  • It's okay.
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  • In fact, it is good.
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  • So if you're married, startlooking at single people
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  • a little differently.
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  • Not as some alien species thatare living sub-normal lives,
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  • nor should you try to playHoly Spirit in finding
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  • them a mate.
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  • I know people who are justlike, oh, you're not married?
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  • And they become like aheat-seeking missile and
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  • they try to play Holy Ghostand find 'em a mate.
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  • Look, you can be a helper, justdon't try to be the helper.
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  • You know, God canmanage without you.
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  • He might use you,but he might not.
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  • So that's if you're married.
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  • Now if you're single, in thevery least I want you to see
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  • your position as okay, but Ihope you go beyond that and see
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  • your single status as notjust okay, but important.
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  • In fact, it's valuable.
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  • And your single status mayor may not be permanent.
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  • You may say, now, whywould it be so important?
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  • Why would Paul make a big dealout of saying, I want you to
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  • know it's good and it's okay?
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  • And he does so throughout thewhole chapter, by the way.
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  • Because, and I want you to seethis, there are many practical
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  • advantages to being asingle person, Paul says.
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  • So look down at verse 32, lookwhat he says in the next
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  • two verses, 32-33.
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  • "He who is unmarried, that'ssingle, cares for the things
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  • of the Lord, how he mayplease the Lord.
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  • But he who is married caresabout the things of the world,
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  • how he may please his wife."
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  • Now please don't misunderstand,he's not saying if you're
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  • unmarried you're more spiritual,if you're married
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  • you're worldly.
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  • When he says, cares for thethings of the world, he's making
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  • a valid point.
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  • When you're single, youhave greater flexibility,
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  • you have greater freedom.
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  • You can move around anddo whatever you want.
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  • You can follow the Lord's callto any country in the world,
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  • any activity at any time.
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  • You can go somewhere at the dropof a hat, and it's your hat.
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  • But when you're married, thatbrings a certain preoccupation
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  • with it.
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  • Concerns for your spouse,as it should.
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  • You're divided.
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  • You can serve the Lordcertainly, but it's not
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  • unfettered, unrestricted.
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  • It brings with it acertain responsibility.
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  • So he says it's not only good,it's very valuable, and you can
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  • be wholeheartedly focusedon the things of the Lord.
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  • Now for just a moment considerall the people in Scripture
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  • who God used.
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  • Well, not all of them, justconsider a few of them.
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  • Joseph, Prime Minister of Egypt,saved the world from a famine,
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  • and when he did sohe was single.
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  • He was not married at the time.
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  • He got married later, but hisgreatest feat of activity was
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  • while he was single.
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  • Think of Daniel theprophet in Babylon.
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  • Third ruler of the kingdom, theone who gave advice to the ruler
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  • of the world, Nebuchadnezzar,as a single.
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  • Think of Amos the prophet,eighth century BC.
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  • Impacted and influenced Israelas a single person.
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  • Think of Elijah the prophet, whostood singlehandedly for the
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  • Lord in a corrupt nationas a single person.
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  • Think of John the Baptist whowas single, and Jesus said of
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  • him, he's the greatest manwho's ever been born.
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  • And he was single.
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  • Paul the apostle, first centurymissionary, church planter,
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  • Bible writer, single.
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  • Jesus, our Savior, whoaccomplished salvation
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  • for the world as a single.
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  • In fact, one journalist,H.L. Mencken,
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  • wrote, "It is impossibleto believe that the same God
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  • who permitted his own son to diea bachelor regards celibacy
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  • as an actual sin."
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  • And we as the church look backand are thankful for people
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  • like Origen, one of theearly church fathers.
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  • David Brainerd, missionaryto the American Indians.
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  • Robert Murray McShane, greatinfluential author and churchman
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  • of England.
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  • Corrie ten Boom, who I've oftenquoted, survived the Nazi
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  • concentration camps.
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  • Dietrich Bonhoeffer,German pastor.
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  • Rachel Saint, ministered to theAuca Indians for years after
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  • her husband died.
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  • John Stott, one of myheroes in the faith.
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  • All contributing toGod's work as singles.
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  • So I think we can agree withPaul and say the single life
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  • can be what?
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  • Good.
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  • Can be good.
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  • Let's consider the secondcategory, we'll go a little
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  • deeper with this now,the celibate life.
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  • You go, uh-oh.
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  • The celibate liferequires a gift.
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  • Go now to Matthew 19.
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  • You marked that in advance,Matthew chapter 19, verse 1.
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  • "Now it came to pass, when Jesushad finished these sayings, that
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  • he departed from Galilee andcame to the region of Judea
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  • beyond the Jordan.
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  • Great multitudes followed him,and he healed them there.
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  • The Pharisees also came to him,testing him, and saying to him,
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  • 'Is it lawful for a man todivorce his wife for just
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  • any reason?'"
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  • Now stop there for a moment.
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  • You know why they askedthis question?
  • 00:06:56.808 --> 00:06:59.644
  • Because they actually believedit was permissible for a man
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  • to divorce his wifefor just any reason.
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  • You see, there was a passage,there still is, in the
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  • Old Testament, Deuteronomy 24,it's the only passage that
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  • regulates divorce.
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  • And in that passage Moses said,if a man finds a case of
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  • uncleanness in his wife, it'spermissible for him to give her
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  • a writing of divorceand to send her away.
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  • So the debate was, what is thecause of uncleanness that
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  • a man finds in his wife?
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  • Well, it was divided.
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  • There where the conservativewing of the Jewish party under
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  • Rabbi Shammai, who saiduncleanness must mean
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  • sexual infidelity.
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  • If she goes out and commitsadultery, that's the uncleanness
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  • that permits a man to divorcehis wife; however, there was
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  • a more liberal wing under RabbiHillel who said, well, you can
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  • divorce your wife for anythingyou think is an uncleanness.
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  • Now I'm kidding you not when Igive you some of these examples.
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  • If she puts too much saltin his food, uncleanness.
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  • If she greets another manpublicly, uncleanness.
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  • If she wears her bound hairunbound, that is loose and down,
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  • flowing down, in public.
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  • If she spins around withtoo much joy in public.
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  • I mean, it went on and on.
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  • If she speaks badabout his parents.
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  • Yeah, somebody's--Now that was interesting.
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  • [congregation laughing]
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  • And I won't ask you to raiseyour hand, but that was good.
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  • That's the kind of interactionI like, by the way.
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  • I like that.
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  • [congregation laughing]
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  • Okay, so you've got RabbiShammai saying narrow, only
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  • adultery, you have Rabbi Hillelsaying wide, broad, any reason.
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  • Which do you thinkthe Jewish men prefer?
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  • Which interpretation?
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  • This guy.
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  • I like the anything goes.
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  • In fact, in this category ofliberal thinking, there was
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  • another rabbi who came later onnamed Rabbi Akiba, who said if
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  • a man finds another woman who'smore attractive than his wife,
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  • that's uncleanness, hecan divorce his wife.
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  • So they come to Jesus and theysay, is it okay for a man
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  • to leave his wife for just anyreason, to divorce his wife
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  • for just any reason?
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  • So Jesus has an answer for that.
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  • He answered them, verse 4, and Ialways love his answers, he's
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  • basically saying, don't you guysever read your Bible?
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  • He answered them and said,
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  • "Have you not read that he whomade them at the beginning made
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  • them male and female?"
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  • He said, "For this reason a manwill leave his father and
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  • mother, be joined to his wife,and the two will become
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  • one flesh."
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  • What's he quoting?
  • 00:09:49.481 --> 00:09:50.849
  • Book of Genesis.
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  • So then they are no longertwo but one flesh.
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  • "Therefore, what God has joinedtogether, let not man separate."
  • 00:09:54.986 --> 00:10:01.393
  • Now they didn't like his answer,because he took 'em back to what
  • 00:10:01.393 --> 00:10:04.329
  • the Bible says, and says,God holds a very sacred,
  • 00:10:04.329 --> 00:10:07.399
  • narrow view.
  • 00:10:07.399 --> 00:10:09.634
  • Verse 7: "They said to him, whythen did Moses command to give
  • 00:10:09.634 --> 00:10:15.540
  • a certificate of divorce,and put her away?"
  • 00:10:15.540 --> 00:10:18.209
  • Now here's what you needto understand.
  • 00:10:18.209 --> 00:10:19.544
  • By the time of Jesus, all theserabbinical interpretations came
  • 00:10:19.544 --> 00:10:23.181
  • down, and they believe now it'snot just a permission slip to
  • 00:10:23.181 --> 00:10:28.119
  • get a divorce,it's a commandment.
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  • I'm sorry, honey,I gotta divorce you.
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  • Moses commanded me to, If Ifind uncleanness, and I find it.
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  • So it's a commandment.
  • 00:10:38.463 --> 00:10:39.798
  • Why did Moses give usa command to do that?
  • 00:10:39.798 --> 00:10:42.934
  • Verse 8: "He said to them,Moses, because of the hardness
  • 00:10:42.934 --> 00:10:46.871
  • of your hearts, permitted you todivorce your wives, but from the
  • 00:10:46.871 --> 00:10:51.609
  • beginning it was not so.
  • 00:10:51.609 --> 00:10:54.112
  • And I say unto you, whoeverdivorces his wife, except for
  • 00:10:54.112 --> 00:10:59.150
  • sexual immorality and marriesanother, commits adultery, and
  • 00:10:59.150 --> 00:11:05.523
  • whoever marries her who isdivorced commits adultery."
  • 00:11:05.523 --> 00:11:11.162
  • Okay, so the disciples arelistening to this conversation.
  • 00:11:11.162 --> 00:11:16.134
  • And you're going to see, they'reshocked by it, because the
  • 00:11:16.134 --> 00:11:18.503
  • culture the disciples wereraised in was this Jewish
  • 00:11:18.503 --> 00:11:22.674
  • interpretation that made itpermissible to divorce your wife
  • 00:11:22.674 --> 00:11:26.344
  • for any reason.
  • 00:11:26.344 --> 00:11:27.712
  • That was rampant inrabbinical teaching.
  • 00:11:27.712 --> 00:11:29.948
  • In fact, listen to this littlequote from the
  • 00:11:29.948 --> 00:11:32.016
  • Talmudic writings.
  • 00:11:32.016 --> 00:11:33.384
  • One Rabbi said, a bad wife islike leprosy to her husband.
  • 00:11:33.384 --> 00:11:38.556
  • What is the remedy?
  • 00:11:38.556 --> 00:11:40.158
  • Let him divorce her and becured of his leprosy.
  • 00:11:40.158 --> 00:11:46.064
  • So listen to the shock.
  • 00:11:46.064 --> 00:11:48.833
  • Verse 10:
  • 00:11:48.833 --> 00:11:50.168
  • "His disciples said to him,'If such is the case of the man
  • 00:11:50.168 --> 00:11:54.639
  • with his wife, it'sbetter not to marry.'"
  • 00:11:54.639 --> 00:11:58.943
  • Can you hear theshock in their voice?
  • 00:11:58.943 --> 00:12:01.980
  • They hear what Jesus said inanswering them and they're
  • 00:12:01.980 --> 00:12:04.315
  • thinking, if you're saying thatit requires a lifelong
  • 00:12:04.315 --> 00:12:07.952
  • commitment that can only bebroken by death or an infidelity
  • 00:12:07.952 --> 00:12:11.456
  • on her part, that's radical.
  • 00:12:11.456 --> 00:12:14.292
  • It's just better to be single.
  • 00:12:14.292 --> 00:12:16.728
  • And notice Jesus'sanswer to them.
  • 00:12:16.728 --> 00:12:18.263
  • He didn't go, well, what Ireally meant to say it was--
  • 00:12:18.263 --> 00:12:22.367
  • He says, well, actually, I'mglad you brought that up.
  • 00:12:22.367 --> 00:12:27.038
  • Verse 11:
  • 00:12:27.038 --> 00:12:28.406
  • "He said to them, 'Allcannot accept this saying.'"
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  • What saying?
  • 00:12:31.910 --> 00:12:33.278
  • What they just said.
  • 00:12:33.278 --> 00:12:34.779
  • That it's better not to marry.
  • 00:12:34.779 --> 00:12:37.348
  • "All cannot accept this saying,but only to those to whom it
  • 00:12:37.348 --> 00:12:43.087
  • has been," what's the word?
  • 00:12:43.087 --> 00:12:45.223
  • "Given."
  • 00:12:45.223 --> 00:12:46.558
  • It's a gift.
  • 00:12:46.558 --> 00:12:49.761
  • "For there are eunuchs who wereborn to us from their mother's
  • 00:12:49.761 --> 00:12:52.664
  • womb, and there are eunuchs, whowere made eunuchs by men, and
  • 00:12:52.664 --> 00:12:57.669
  • there are eunuchs who have madethemselves you next for the
  • 00:12:57.669 --> 00:13:00.572
  • kingdom of heaven's sake.
  • 00:13:00.572 --> 00:13:01.940
  • He who is able to accepted,let him accept it."
  • 00:13:01.940 --> 00:13:05.510
  • Now you're thinkin',what is all that about?
  • 00:13:05.510 --> 00:13:08.246
  • Well, what Jesus mentions herein verse 12 is three categories
  • 00:13:08.246 --> 00:13:17.288
  • of single celibacy that werecommon in ancient times.
  • 00:13:17.288 --> 00:13:22.327
  • Notice them.
  • 00:13:22.327 --> 00:13:23.695
  • He said, there are eunuchs whowere born to us from their
  • 00:13:23.695 --> 00:13:26.130
  • mother's womb.
  • 00:13:26.130 --> 00:13:27.665
  • What is he talkin' about?
  • 00:13:27.665 --> 00:13:29.234
  • People born with a congenitaldeformity, either undeveloped or
  • 00:13:29.234 --> 00:13:34.339
  • underdeveloped sexual capacity,and that physical deformity
  • 00:13:34.339 --> 00:13:38.576
  • prevents them fromhaving children.
  • 00:13:38.576 --> 00:13:41.679
  • Second category he mentions,those who were made eunuchs
  • 00:13:41.679 --> 00:13:45.416
  • by men.
  • 00:13:45.416 --> 00:13:47.619
  • You know what that means?
  • 00:13:47.619 --> 00:13:49.621
  • Men who are castrated.
  • 00:13:49.621 --> 00:13:52.023
  • Now I'm just guessing youprobably haven't heard a sermon
  • 00:13:52.023 --> 00:13:54.959
  • with castration in probablyever, so here goes.
  • 00:13:54.959 --> 00:13:58.863
  • There's just no other, there'sno delicate way to say that, but
  • 00:13:58.863 --> 00:14:02.800
  • in ancient times there wereharems, kings that had lots of
  • 00:14:02.800 --> 00:14:07.305
  • women around them, and thekeepers of the harems, the
  • 00:14:07.305 --> 00:14:09.974
  • requirement is they hadto be castrated males.
  • 00:14:09.974 --> 00:14:12.844
  • Because they were safefor obvious reasons.
  • 00:14:12.844 --> 00:14:15.446
  • Because to perform thatoperation diminishes the
  • 00:14:15.446 --> 00:14:18.616
  • sexual drive and any kind ofcapacity, so it renders it safe.
  • 00:14:18.616 --> 00:14:22.787
  • So in those days, in paganism,it was considered a way to
  • 00:14:22.787 --> 00:14:27.125
  • appease your god by becoming oneof these harem guards, that
  • 00:14:27.125 --> 00:14:31.496
  • would please the god, that's howwarped their thinking was.
  • 00:14:31.496 --> 00:14:34.132
  • So you would have parents whowould take their male children
  • 00:14:34.132 --> 00:14:36.534
  • to be castratedfor this purpose.
  • 00:14:36.534 --> 00:14:40.171
  • That's antiquity, butthat was going on.
  • 00:14:40.171 --> 00:14:43.341
  • So he speaks about eunuchs whowere born that way, congenital
  • 00:14:43.341 --> 00:14:47.145
  • deformity, those were madeeunuchs, castrated, but look at
  • 00:14:47.145 --> 00:14:51.115
  • the third category, those whomade themselves eunuchs for
  • 00:14:51.115 --> 00:14:56.888
  • the kingdom of heaven.
  • 00:14:56.888 --> 00:14:59.824
  • Now he's not speaking aboutgoing through a physical
  • 00:14:59.824 --> 00:15:02.327
  • operation here, he's speakinghere of a voluntary decision
  • 00:15:02.327 --> 00:15:07.899
  • to be celibate.
  • 00:15:07.899 --> 00:15:09.367
  • Those who choose celibacy.
  • 00:15:09.367 --> 00:15:12.303
  • It's voluntary, theysign up for it.
  • 00:15:12.303 --> 00:15:16.708
  • Now some of you are looking atme like, who in the world
  • 00:15:16.708 --> 00:15:21.679
  • would ever do that?
  • 00:15:21.679 --> 00:15:24.582
  • Well, Jesus answered that.
  • 00:15:24.582 --> 00:15:26.551
  • Verse 11:
  • 00:15:26.551 --> 00:15:28.086
  • "Only to those to whom ithas been given."
  • 00:15:28.086 --> 00:15:33.291
  • And in verse 12:
  • 00:15:33.291 --> 00:15:34.625
  • "He who was able to accept it,let him accept it."
  • 00:15:34.625 --> 00:15:39.430
  • So this is what it tells me.
  • 00:15:39.430 --> 00:15:40.999
  • Tells me, number one, a life ofsingle celibacy cannot be done
  • 00:15:40.999 --> 00:15:46.404
  • without a gift, a capacity fromGod, an enabling from God.
  • 00:15:46.404 --> 00:15:52.176
  • The word given or gift is didomiin Greek, and it means to bestow
  • 00:15:52.176 --> 00:15:58.916
  • a gift to one's advantage.
  • 00:15:58.916 --> 00:16:04.022
  • So it's a gift.
  • 00:16:04.022 --> 00:16:05.957
  • Now some of you are giving methat look like, oh, dear God,
  • 00:16:05.957 --> 00:16:08.292
  • don't give me that gift!
  • 00:16:08.292 --> 00:16:10.862
  • Give me a lot of othergifts, but not that one.
  • 00:16:10.862 --> 00:16:12.764
  • Send me to the deepest, darkestjungles of anywhere, but don't
  • 00:16:12.764 --> 00:16:16.634
  • make me do that.
  • 00:16:16.634 --> 00:16:18.002
  • Good news for you, you ain'tgot the gift, if that's
  • 00:16:18.002 --> 00:16:20.972
  • how you feel.
  • 00:16:20.972 --> 00:16:22.373
  • So it requires a gift,number one.
  • 00:16:22.373 --> 00:16:24.575
  • Second thing this tells me, ifyou have this gift, you know
  • 00:16:24.575 --> 00:16:27.945
  • you have this gift.
  • 00:16:27.945 --> 00:16:29.313
  • I know I don't have this gift, Iknow I've never had this gift.
  • 00:16:29.313 --> 00:16:32.917
  • That's why I'm married.
  • 00:16:32.917 --> 00:16:34.986
  • But if you have it, you know it,and you know it because either
  • 00:16:34.986 --> 00:16:38.556
  • by nature when you wereborn, or by choice.
  • 00:16:38.556 --> 00:16:43.094
  • So the idea, and Paul mentionsthis in 1 Corinthians 7, he
  • 00:16:43.094 --> 00:16:47.131
  • goes, look, I have this gift,and I encourage those who have
  • 00:16:47.131 --> 00:16:50.735
  • it to accept it, is that Godgives certain people an ability
  • 00:16:50.735 --> 00:16:54.939
  • to withstand the pressuresof this unique lifestyle.
  • 00:16:54.939 --> 00:17:00.178
  • And how do you tell ifyou have this gift?
  • 00:17:00.178 --> 00:17:01.913
  • How do you tell if you're calledbesides wanting it or not
  • 00:17:01.913 --> 00:17:05.083
  • wanting it?
  • 00:17:05.083 --> 00:17:07.685
  • Remember what Paul said in1 Corinthians 7, it's better
  • 00:17:07.685 --> 00:17:10.555
  • to marry than toburn with passion.
  • 00:17:10.555 --> 00:17:12.824
  • If you burn with passion, if youare unfulfilled without the
  • 00:17:12.824 --> 00:17:16.561
  • sexual release from a maritalpartner, you're not called to
  • 00:17:16.561 --> 00:17:20.498
  • this, and don't sweat over that,it's not wrong to get married.
  • 00:17:20.498 --> 00:17:24.635
  • That's what Paul was speakingabout in 1 Corinthians 7.
  • 00:17:24.635 --> 00:17:29.273
  • Now John Stott, I mentioned hima moment ago, a theologian that
  • 00:17:29.273 --> 00:17:32.777
  • I often read and loved, I hadbreakfast with him once in
  • 00:17:32.777 --> 00:17:35.079
  • Amsterdam, he's now in heaven,he lived his whole life and
  • 00:17:35.079 --> 00:17:38.483
  • did his whole ministry asa single man, said this:
  • 00:17:38.483 --> 00:17:41.919
  • "The Bible does not indicatethat either gift," meaning the
  • 00:17:41.919 --> 00:17:47.091
  • gift of marriage or the gift ofcelibacy, "the Bible does not
  • 00:17:47.091 --> 00:17:50.394
  • indicate that either giftis always permanent.
  • 00:17:50.394 --> 00:17:53.264
  • Just because someone is singlenow doesn't mean they'll always
  • 00:17:53.264 --> 00:17:56.501
  • be, and just because someone ismarried now doesn't mean
  • 00:17:56.501 --> 00:17:59.937
  • they will always be."
  • 00:17:59.937 --> 00:18:02.206
  • And so Jesus, in verse 12, says,he who is able to accept it let,
  • 00:18:02.206 --> 00:18:07.645
  • him accept it.
  • 00:18:07.645 --> 00:18:09.013
  • If you can accept singleness asthe will of God for your life,
  • 00:18:09.013 --> 00:18:13.484
  • which include single celibacy,then accept it.
  • 00:18:13.484 --> 00:18:17.054
  • If not, don't accept it,don't sweat it.
  • 00:18:17.054 --> 00:18:20.525
  • But you go by God's call.
  • 00:18:20.525 --> 00:18:22.059
  • So that's the single life,that's the celibate life.
  • 00:18:22.059 --> 00:18:25.863
  • The single life can be good; thecelibate life must be a gift.
  • 00:18:25.863 --> 00:18:31.602
  • Now let's talk about thethird category in closing,
  • 00:18:31.602 --> 00:18:33.905
  • the sensible life.
  • 00:18:33.905 --> 00:18:35.940
  • The sensible life.
  • 00:18:35.940 --> 00:18:37.642
  • And I'd like you to go back to1 Corinthians 7 for a moment,
  • 00:18:37.642 --> 00:18:40.745
  • we're going to closewith two verses.
  • 00:18:40.745 --> 00:18:42.980
  • 1 Corinthians 7, verse 27.
  • 00:18:42.980 --> 00:18:50.454
  • I wish we could go through allthis and then cover it, it would
  • 00:18:50.454 --> 00:18:52.990
  • take several weeks, especiallyfor me to do this, but we'll
  • 00:18:52.990 --> 00:18:56.994
  • just sort of see wherePaul sums it up.
  • 00:18:56.994 --> 00:18:59.697
  • 1 Corinthians 7:27:
  • 00:18:59.697 --> 00:19:01.365
  • "Are you bound to a wife?"
  • 00:19:01.365 --> 00:19:02.900
  • I'm gonna answer that for meand say, yes, happily so.
  • 00:19:02.900 --> 00:19:06.971
  • Yeah, I've made that covenant.
  • 00:19:06.971 --> 00:19:08.306
  • "Are you bound to a wife?
  • 00:19:08.306 --> 00:19:09.674
  • Do not seek to be loosed.
  • 00:19:09.674 --> 00:19:11.943
  • Are you loosed from a wife?"
  • 00:19:11.943 --> 00:19:13.444
  • That is, are you single?
  • 00:19:13.444 --> 00:19:14.779
  • "Do not seek a wife."
  • 00:19:14.779 --> 00:19:17.348
  • Verse 28:
  • 00:19:17.348 --> 00:19:18.716
  • "But even if you do marry, youhaven't sinned, and if a virgin
  • 00:19:18.716 --> 00:19:22.253
  • marries, she hasn't sinned.
  • 00:19:22.253 --> 00:19:23.921
  • Nevertheless, such will havetrouble in the flesh,
  • 00:19:23.921 --> 00:19:29.594
  • but I would spare you."
  • 00:19:29.594 --> 00:19:31.762
  • Now first off, this is justgood, solid, sensible wisdom.
  • 00:19:31.762 --> 00:19:37.501
  • Cherish your life as a singleperson and take advantage of
  • 00:19:37.501 --> 00:19:42.273
  • all that it affords.
  • 00:19:42.273 --> 00:19:44.175
  • It's not wrong if you getmarried, Paul says, as long
  • 00:19:44.175 --> 00:19:47.345
  • as it's to another believer.
  • 00:19:47.345 --> 00:19:49.013
  • And it's not wrong to staysingle as long as when you're
  • 00:19:49.013 --> 00:19:51.782
  • single you don't try to actmarried, you stay celibate.
  • 00:19:51.782 --> 00:19:56.787
  • Yes, God did say in Genesis2:18, it is not good that man
  • 00:19:56.787 --> 00:20:00.458
  • should be alone, that'sthe general principle.
  • 00:20:00.458 --> 00:20:04.495
  • But sometimes it is good, not tobe alone, isolated, but to be as
  • 00:20:04.495 --> 00:20:10.167
  • a single person, if God hascalled you to do that and given
  • 00:20:10.167 --> 00:20:14.872
  • you the enabling to handle it.
  • 00:20:14.872 --> 00:20:18.175
  • Now did you notice whathe says in verse 28?
  • 00:20:18.175 --> 00:20:20.711
  • I think most people are goingto just skip over this.
  • 00:20:20.711 --> 00:20:23.547
  • He says, look, whether you'remarried or single, each is
  • 00:20:23.547 --> 00:20:26.284
  • a gift from God, if you'reloosed, don't seek to be in
  • 00:20:26.284 --> 00:20:29.720
  • a covenant, if you're ina covenant, don't seek
  • 00:20:29.720 --> 00:20:31.289
  • to leave your spouse.
  • 00:20:31.289 --> 00:20:32.923
  • But he says, look, I'm justtrying to tell you that I want
  • 00:20:32.923 --> 00:20:36.627
  • to spare you from the troubleyou'll have in the flesh.
  • 00:20:36.627 --> 00:20:39.997
  • The word trouble, thlipsis,literally means pressure.
  • 00:20:39.997 --> 00:20:44.201
  • You know what he'sspeaking about?
  • 00:20:44.201 --> 00:20:46.370
  • It's the pressure that marriedpeople have that single people
  • 00:20:46.370 --> 00:20:50.274
  • don't have.
  • 00:20:50.274 --> 00:20:52.877
  • All right?
  • 00:20:52.877 --> 00:20:54.245
  • Every married person should begoing, yep, that's true.
  • 00:20:54.245 --> 00:20:56.514
  • Once you get married, youexperience a certain kind
  • 00:20:56.514 --> 00:20:59.850
  • of pressure, like two completelyopposite personalities
  • 00:20:59.850 --> 00:21:04.722
  • blending in a single unit.
  • 00:21:04.722 --> 00:21:07.525
  • Like, dude, what are you doingleaving your socks there?
  • 00:21:07.525 --> 00:21:10.661
  • Or, honey, why do you make thetoilet paper go under, it should
  • 00:21:10.661 --> 00:21:14.465
  • go over.
  • 00:21:14.465 --> 00:21:16.100
  • All those little adjustments,right, that we go through
  • 00:21:16.100 --> 00:21:19.637
  • as married couples.
  • 00:21:19.637 --> 00:21:21.872
  • Conflicts that we have asmarried couples, demands that
  • 00:21:21.872 --> 00:21:25.209
  • come with marriage, hardshipsthat come with the relationship,
  • 00:21:25.209 --> 00:21:28.479
  • sacrifice that comeswith a relationship.
  • 00:21:28.479 --> 00:21:30.715
  • All of these are the pressures.
  • 00:21:30.715 --> 00:21:32.183
  • Paul said, I want to spare you,single people, those kinds
  • 00:21:32.183 --> 00:21:35.653
  • of pressures.
  • 00:21:35.653 --> 00:21:37.021
  • It's not a sin if you getmarried, it's fine, God calls
  • 00:21:37.021 --> 00:21:38.789
  • people to do it.
  • 00:21:38.789 --> 00:21:40.124
  • In fact, most people to do it,but I would just like to spare
  • 00:21:40.124 --> 00:21:42.493
  • you those pressures because youdon't have those as
  • 00:21:42.493 --> 00:21:45.963
  • a single person.
  • 00:21:45.963 --> 00:21:47.531
  • You go, I know, but I gota lot of other pressures.
  • 00:21:47.531 --> 00:21:49.433
  • Yes, you do.
  • 00:21:49.433 --> 00:21:50.801
  • But you don't havethose pressures.
  • 00:21:50.801 --> 00:21:54.038
  • One gal said, there's only onething harder than living alone
  • 00:21:54.038 --> 00:21:57.007
  • and that is to live withanother person.
  • 00:21:57.007 --> 00:22:01.011
  • So here's the sensible life.
  • 00:22:01.011 --> 00:22:04.615
  • Learn to be content.
  • 00:22:04.615 --> 00:22:07.184
  • By the way, it hasto be learned.
  • 00:22:07.184 --> 00:22:08.552
  • Paul said, I've learnedto be content.
  • 00:22:08.552 --> 00:22:11.322
  • It didn't come naturally.
  • 00:22:11.322 --> 00:22:12.923
  • I know many single people whoare not content being single,
  • 00:22:12.923 --> 00:22:17.661
  • and I know many married peopleare not content being married.
  • 00:22:17.661 --> 00:22:20.598
  • I have a guess that they werenot content being single.
  • 00:22:20.598 --> 00:22:23.701
  • They need to learn contentmentin whatever God has called them
  • 00:22:23.701 --> 00:22:26.737
  • to do.
  • 00:22:26.737 --> 00:22:28.439
  • So the caution is this.
  • 00:22:28.439 --> 00:22:30.641
  • You must be called by God ifthis is going to be long-term.
  • 00:22:30.641 --> 00:22:36.247
  • And you must be kept by God,whether it's short-term
  • 00:22:36.247 --> 00:22:40.084
  • or long-term.
  • 00:22:40.084 --> 00:22:42.186
  • Because, just like it's wrong tobe married and act single,
  • 00:22:42.186 --> 00:22:48.726
  • it's wrong to be singleand act married.
  • 00:22:48.726 --> 00:22:52.463
  • What do I mean?
  • 00:22:52.463 --> 00:22:53.798
  • You've all known people who aremarried but they act single.
  • 00:22:53.798 --> 00:22:56.567
  • It's like, dude, what are youdoin' pickin' up on that chick?
  • 00:22:56.567 --> 00:22:58.402
  • What are you doing talkingto her like that?
  • 00:22:58.402 --> 00:23:00.304
  • Well, you know, just--No, juststop it, it's inappropriate.
  • 00:23:00.304 --> 00:23:04.475
  • Act married, you're in acovenant relationship,
  • 00:23:04.475 --> 00:23:08.078
  • knock that off.
  • 00:23:08.078 --> 00:23:09.447
  • But it's also wrong forsingle people to act like
  • 00:23:09.447 --> 00:23:11.582
  • they're married.
  • 00:23:11.582 --> 00:23:12.950
  • Like, well, we sleep together,we enjoy all the fringe benefits
  • 00:23:12.950 --> 00:23:14.485
  • of marriage, I can dowhatever I want.
  • 00:23:14.485 --> 00:23:16.053
  • That's Corinth.
  • 00:23:16.053 --> 00:23:18.055
  • "It is good for a man notto touch a woman."
  • 00:23:18.055 --> 00:23:21.358
  • So you need to be calledand you need to be kept.
  • 00:23:21.358 --> 00:23:25.129
  • So once again, if you'remarried, don't discount single
  • 00:23:25.129 --> 00:23:28.199
  • people, don't overlook divorcedor widowed, include them in your
  • 00:23:28.199 --> 00:23:34.772
  • social activities, don'tpressure them, encourage them
  • 00:23:34.772 --> 00:23:38.876
  • in their walk with the Lord.
  • 00:23:38.876 --> 00:23:40.311
  • And if you're single, pleasedon't waste your singleness.
  • 00:23:40.311 --> 00:23:46.016
  • What do I mean by that?
  • 00:23:46.016 --> 00:23:47.685
  • I mean, since you're single,why not throw yourself
  • 00:23:47.685 --> 00:23:50.988
  • wholeheartedly into the plan ofGod for your life, the work
  • 00:23:50.988 --> 00:23:55.559
  • of God for your life?
  • 00:23:55.559 --> 00:23:56.994
  • There may never be another timein your life where you have the
  • 00:23:56.994 --> 00:24:00.764
  • freedom to serve the Lord likeyou do now as a single person.
  • 00:24:00.764 --> 00:24:05.035
  • And so use it.
  • 00:24:05.035 --> 00:24:07.738
  • In fact, there's a side benefitto that, just think about it.
  • 00:24:07.738 --> 00:24:10.908
  • As you pour yourself intoserving the Lord, you might just
  • 00:24:10.908 --> 00:24:13.944
  • meet somebody else who's pouringhim or herself into serving the
  • 00:24:13.944 --> 00:24:17.081
  • Lord, and that might be yourfuture husband or wife.
  • 00:24:17.081 --> 00:24:19.483
  • By the way, that's where youwant to meet them, not at a bar,
  • 00:24:19.483 --> 00:24:23.888
  • but serving the Lord together.
  • 00:24:23.888 --> 00:24:26.490
  • They have that common passionto serve him.
  • 00:24:26.490 --> 00:24:29.793
  • I want to close,and I am closing.
  • 00:24:29.793 --> 00:24:33.464
  • You're going, phew,thank you, Jesus.
  • 00:24:33.464 --> 00:24:36.433
  • With something that I read thatministered to me as a single
  • 00:24:36.433 --> 00:24:41.105
  • male, before I was married.
  • 00:24:41.105 --> 00:24:43.541
  • So you have to think, boy,that was written BC?
  • 00:24:43.541 --> 00:24:45.576
  • [congregation laughing]
  • 00:24:45.576 --> 00:24:47.745
  • And I read this, it was by AnnKiemel, and now she's Ann Kiemel
  • 00:24:47.745 --> 00:24:51.181
  • Anderson, she got married.
  • 00:24:51.181 --> 00:24:52.850
  • But as a single author I thinkshe captured a maturity.
  • 00:24:52.850 --> 00:24:56.287
  • She said this:
  • 00:24:56.287 --> 00:24:57.621
  • "Jesus, if this is your will,then yes to being single.
  • 00:24:57.621 --> 00:25:04.328
  • It is my deepest heart that Iwant to marry, to belong to
  • 00:25:04.328 --> 00:25:08.732
  • a great man, to know that I amlinked to his life and he to
  • 00:25:08.732 --> 00:25:12.236
  • mine, following Christin our dreams together.
  • 00:25:12.236 --> 00:25:16.974
  • But you know what I need, so ifI never marry, it's yes to you."
  • 00:25:16.974 --> 00:25:24.181
  • Say, yes to him today,single or married.
  • 00:25:24.181 --> 00:25:29.587
  • So the single life can be good,the celibate life must be
  • 00:25:29.587 --> 00:25:32.690
  • a gift, the sensible lifeshould be your goal.
  • 00:25:32.690 --> 00:25:37.061
  • Scott Dooley: You have beenwatching Skip Heitzig in the
  • 00:25:41.231 --> 00:25:43.100
  • message, "Get Prequalified:The Minimalist Home."
  • 00:25:43.100 --> 00:25:46.537
  • Now, here's Lenya Heitzigwith our current special
  • 00:25:46.537 --> 00:25:49.473
  • resource offer.
  • 00:25:49.473 --> 00:25:53.611
  • Lenya Heitzig: Just abouteveryone who has ever lived
  • 00:25:53.611 --> 00:25:56.747
  • has experienced a broken heartto some degree or another.
  • 00:25:56.747 --> 00:26:00.417
  • But then there are others whohave been affected so adversely
  • 00:26:00.417 --> 00:26:03.787
  • by events in their lives thatthey can be described
  • 00:26:03.787 --> 00:26:07.324
  • as broken people.
  • 00:26:07.324 --> 00:26:08.692
  • We can respond by questioningwhy God allows bad things
  • 00:26:08.692 --> 00:26:12.363
  • to happen, or by loving thebroken in his name and then
  • 00:26:12.363 --> 00:26:16.400
  • being a part of the solution.
  • 00:26:16.400 --> 00:26:18.102
  • This week, on "Connect WithSkip," we are offering a special
  • 00:26:18.102 --> 00:26:21.939
  • package of four booklets fromour "Jesus Loves People" series.
  • 00:26:21.939 --> 00:26:26.810
  • They are, "Jesus Loves Addicts,""Homosexuals," "Terrorists,"
  • 00:26:26.810 --> 00:26:31.148
  • and "the Broken."
  • 00:26:31.148 --> 00:26:32.483
  • Yes, Jesus loves people whodon't believe in him, who aren't
  • 00:26:32.483 --> 00:26:36.320
  • sure what they think about him.
  • 00:26:36.320 --> 00:26:38.656
  • It's marvelous to see the loveof Jesus for addicts, atheists,
  • 00:26:38.656 --> 00:26:43.594
  • the broken, and of course,you and I.
  • 00:26:43.594 --> 00:26:46.864
  • Remember, Jesus neverturned away the questions
  • 00:26:46.864 --> 00:26:49.166
  • of a sincere searcher.
  • 00:26:49.166 --> 00:26:51.368
  • I hope you'll order packages ofthese booklets and share them
  • 00:26:51.368 --> 00:26:55.239
  • with friends and family.
  • 00:26:55.239 --> 00:26:56.774
  • Here's how to orderthese four booklets.
  • 00:26:56.774 --> 00:26:59.643
  • Scott Dooley: Get your copy ofthe set of booklets by calling
  • 00:26:59.643 --> 00:27:02.179
  • 1-800-922-1888, or onlineat connectwithskip.com.
  • 00:27:02.179 --> 00:27:07.918
  • That's 1-800-922-1888, or onlineat connectwithskip.com.
  • 00:27:07.918 --> 00:27:16.960
  • Scott Dooley: Thanks for joiningus on "Connect with
  • 00:27:20.998 --> 00:27:22.332
  • Skip Heitzig."
  • 00:27:22.332 --> 00:27:23.801
  • We're connecting you to God'snever-changing truth
  • 00:27:23.801 --> 00:27:26.637
  • in ever-changing times.
  • 00:27:26.637 --> 00:27:29.999