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What Are Soul Ties? | Better Together

January 15, 2020

25:38

How can we identify and break unhealthy spiritual and emotional bonds that keep us from healing? | TBN Prayer Line: 1-888-731-1000

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What Are Soul Ties? | Better Together

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- Souls knitted together,(soft new age music)
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the bond created isnot always healthy.
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How can we untiespiritual connections
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that block us from healing?
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Come on, let's talk about it.
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(inspirational new age music)
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- What I can reflectback on, growing up, is,
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it's the moments of, whenI was not serving the Lord,
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being in certain relationships.
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And I noticed certainpatterns that would happen
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in my life.
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And it took a woman ofGod, my spiritual mother,
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Cely May Olden,wherever you are,
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thank you, thank you, thank you.
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She was the one whowas like a third party
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looking from the outsidelooking into my life.
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And I lived with her,I learned how to pray,
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I learned, just thelife of a believer,
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an abundant life.
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And so, she saw thisinteraction, going back to what
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I was saying in the beginning,seeing this interaction
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between me and my stepfather.
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And we were outside of thechurch, and he was just sitting
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right next to me, and atthis point this was prior
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to me being married, priorto me meeting my husband,
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but we were at the churchthat I got saved in,
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he was sitting right next tome, and it was the interaction
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that we had.
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It was the way heinteracted with me,
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that was, in what shephrased it as inappropriate,
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his approach to me.
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Body language, the wayhis hand, as a male,
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would be on my thigh, justthings of that nature.
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The interaction; and shepulled me to the side
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when I returnedback to her place,
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pulled me to the sideand started to talkto me about that.
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And I never realized,because those red flags
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were almost railroaded, ifI could put it that way,
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I could not interpretthose red flags.
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And so I can look back at someof the unhealthy connections,
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of some of thephysical connections
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that I've had over my life.
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Not only did itstart with abuse,
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but the way hewould approach me,
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and I would sit thereand just take it.
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His impropriety, hisinappropriate way, manner.
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And so, when I thinkof soul ties, I think
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of that connection, lookingback in the scriptures
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with Dinah, and the princefrom, I believe it was Shechem,
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or a Hivite, of some type,
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and so I guess he wasinappropriate with her,
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he raped her.
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And then he would go back,and the phrase would be
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in one translation thathis soul clung to Dinah.
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So this, almost like thisclaving, this attachment,
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and I think that'swhat a soul tie is.
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It's an unhealthy tetheredway of connecting to someone.
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That happens chemically,when you have intimacy
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between two parties, and there's
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an emotional bond that happens.
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Well it happens just the sameway in a healthy connection,
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it happens in an unhealthyway, when an abuser approaches
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the person that they'regrooming to be abused.
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And so, that happened tome, but now those signs,
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I wasn't aware of.
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So when I think of soul ties,I think of those unhealthy
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attachments, whetherit's promiscuity,
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whether it's an abuser,whether it's an old boyfriend,
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whether it's anabusive relationship,
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whatever that is,(soft new age music)
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that's what a soul tie is.
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- When we think of soulties, I don't know what kind
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of images that conjures up inyour mind, what you think of,
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and what's healthy andwhat's not healthy.
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And reflecting on whetheran unhealthy soul tie
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can actually impactyour inner healing.
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And I think it can, becauseI think our very first
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soul tie, our very firstallegiance, is to Christ.
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That because of whathe did on the cross,
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that when we give our livesto him, that we are somehow,
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in a way that's hard forus to grasp on this earth,
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but we are in Christ,we are a new creation.
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So we are in him.
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Now, if we have tiesthat are unhealthy,
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the Holy Spirit wantsto work in your life
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and in my life to bringus closer to Jesus,
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but unhealthy soul tiescan keep pulling us away.
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And at some point, andthat's where I would
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really recommend, scripturesays if anybody lacks wisdom,
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let them ask, and the Lordwould love to let us know.
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So I think when there'sany kind of soul tie
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and you're not sure ifit's healthy or not,
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ask the Holy Spiritto give you wisdom.
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And if it is somethingthat's hindering your journey
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with Christ, thenit's time to cut that.
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Perhaps sometimefurther down the road,
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when that person's maybein a different place,
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and you are too, butnever allow a soul tie
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to someone else toimpact what Christ
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through the Holy Spiritis doing in your life.
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- We have to understandthe anatomy of the soul,
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I think it's so importantto understand that is,
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because we know our body, weunderstand that we're spirit,
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but the word of God saysthat when God breathed
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into the nostrils of Adamhe became a living soul.
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And that is wherehis identity is,
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that's where who he is resides.
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That's his mind, hiswill, his emotions,
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it's the same for allof us, and I think
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we end up havinginfluences on our thoughts,
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on what we do, and how we feel,
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that are not appropriate,and we have to actually
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cast those thingsdown, because it does,
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it infects your relationships.
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Those soul ties, if you don'tintentionally break them,
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they will destroy you.
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And I know relationships thatI had prior to my husband,
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there was one relationshipin particular,
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I thought I wasgonna marry this guy.
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That I just knew wewere gonna get married,
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I loved him, and my husbandhates to hear me say that,
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'cause he's like, how canyou love anybody before me?
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(shared laughing)
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But, it happened; I loved him.
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- [Woman] Bless his heart.
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- Hey, just don't lethim watch this one.
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Don't let him watch this one.
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- I'm definitely notletting him watch this.
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For the longest time Iwould think about this guy,
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and whenever his namewas mentioned I just felt
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a certain way, and heavenforbid he was in town
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and he wanted to havelunch, and I wanted to go,
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but I couldn't,'cause I was married.
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And I realized therewas ground in my soul
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that was knit to him.
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- That's a great word.- And you literally
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have to unwind it, andyou have to replace it
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with other thoughts, youhave to replace it with,
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and here's the thing,thoughts become habits,
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habits become character,character becomes destiny.
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And so we have tostop it in our mind.
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That's where the battle is.
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Once we change our thinking
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and we allow God then(soft new age music)
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to change how we feel, thenwe will change what we do.
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But it starts with our thoughts.
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- If I can encourageanybody who might be trying
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to sever those unhealthyties, soul ties
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to another person, I guessthe best advice would be this;
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if you do have kids,
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pretend you'retalking to your kid,
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and what would youtell your kid to do?
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You would tell your child,because you'd wanna protect
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your child, look, thisis not good for you.
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You need to stopbeing their friend.
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They're not a goodinfluence on you.
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You need to let go.
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And now look at yourself,what do you see?
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What do you need to let go of?
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Who's a bad influence on you?
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Who are you too closeto that it's just toxic?
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And the relationshipshould not be?
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It doesn't mean you can't just,
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talk every once in a whileon the phone, I don't know,
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but sometimes it's okay, andI wanna give you permission
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to have boundaries.
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Boundaries are good.
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Sometimes you need somebodyto give you permission,
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that it's okay to haveboundaries, and set them up.
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Because even ifpeople are mad at you,
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it is more importantfor you to protect
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your heart, and guard yourheart, 'cause you're God's gift.
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- When it comes to soul ties,it manifested in my bedroom.
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So these image, theseflashbacks, of childhood,
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things that happened to mewould revisit in the middle
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of an intimate moment.
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And so, how do I cut that?
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And the Lord gave me sucha strong, prophetic image
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of almost like this furnace,this furnace in this space,
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and it was almostlike a mortuary,
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where they cremate things,and so the Lord said,
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Diana, I want youto take that thought
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and just put it into this oven,
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and it will beextinguished forever.
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And so every time aflashback came to my mind,
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I would just pray to myself,Lord I just put that,
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I relinquish controlover that, I forgive,
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I release it to you,and then in his hands
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he'll put it into that fire.
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And that won't haunt me,the power of that memory
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won't revisit me, in themost intimate moments.
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And I think most peoplefeel like they are tethered
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to those memories,tethered to that history,
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and they feel like,oh, I can never build
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a new life or a newway of thinking,
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but I am a testimonyto that, that you can.
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You can overcome, you canhave a healthy sex life,
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you can be whole, complete,you won't feel fractured,
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or feel duplicitous,like you're fragmented
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on the inside.
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Your body will becomeone with your spirit,
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and with your soul.
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And so, I think for meit was actually burning
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that image.- Well you have
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to cast down those thoughts.- Replacing it.
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Yes, it's a vainimagination, yeah.
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- And bring them into captivityto the hands of Christ,
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which means rememberingwhat the word of God says,
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and you did the right thing,which is, I'm gonna replace
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these thoughts of shame,and pain, with the truth
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of God's word, then youbegin to have a different
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perspective, which allowsyou to feel differently.
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I had to do the exact samething, 'cause, with being
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sexually abused as achild, when my husband
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wanted to be intimate,and you know how we,
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he wants to say certain things,and those were some things
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that had been saidto me as a child,
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and so when he wouldsay those things
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it would trigger me, and Iwould become really cold,
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and God had to literallyhelp me to replace
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those thoughts andimaginations, and recognize,
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you are safe with yourhusband, he loves you,
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he's not gonna hurt you, Ihave created him for you,
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and replacing those thoughtsis what led to my freedom.
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(soft new age music)
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- We are here for you.
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- Join our communityat Better Together TV
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to connect with womenall over the world.
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- We love you, but mostimportantly, Jesus loves you.
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- I think soul ties canalso be through different
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relationships, brothers,or a toxic friend,
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or a sister, I thinksomeone's actions
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that totally affectyou every time
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they play out, is asoul tie, or can be.
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- I actually experiencedthat with one of my friends
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after Barry and I got married.
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There was a girl thatI was very close to,
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and maybe after wewere a month married,
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she called me onenight, and she said,
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I've just receivedsome terrible news,
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and I said, oh gosh, what?
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And she said, I've justbeen diagnosed HIV positive.
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So I said to her,listen, you know what?
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I sent her the airfare andI flew her into Nashville,
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where we were living atthe time, and I said,
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I'm gonna go to theclinic with you,
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and we're just gonna findout exactly what's going on.
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So she flew in, I went with her,
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I remember sitting inthis clinic thinking
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there are a lot of peoplein here who are gonna know
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who I am. (shared laughing)
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So, and then she had tosign a release to say
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that I could go back in aweek and get the result.
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So I go back in a weekand get the result,
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and they're like, no,well there's nothing,
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there's nothing wrong with her.
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So I call my friend,and I said, great news,
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you're absolutely fine.
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And I said, why did youthink you did have this?
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And she said, well I justdidn't feel very well,
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and I'd been doing some things,
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and honestly I've justkind of missed you.
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And I thought, wellthat's really strange.(shared laughing)
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Two months down theline she said, hey,
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I just happened to bein town, is there anyway
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that could have dinner?
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And I'm like, yeah, sure, come.
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And I said, youcan stay the night.
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Two o'clock in themorning, she wakes me up
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and she said, I'veswallowed a whole bottle
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of Tylenol, I'vetried to kill myself.
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So I'm waking my husband,I'm like, we have to get her
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to the hospital,we go to the ER,
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and she's taken back,and a while later
00:12:57.791 --> 00:13:00.227
the doctor came out andsaid, why did you bring her?
00:13:00.227 --> 00:13:02.762
And I said, becauseshe swallowed a wholebottle of pills.
00:13:02.762 --> 00:13:05.498
He said, at the mostshe took two Tylenol,
00:13:05.498 --> 00:13:07.467
there's nothing in her system.
00:13:07.467 --> 00:13:09.603
And it was all this, Iwant to be with you now,
00:13:09.603 --> 00:13:12.706
and if you're gonnabe with this guy,
00:13:12.706 --> 00:13:14.441
I want to be part of it,
00:13:14.441 --> 00:13:15.842
and it was a really hardthing, I had to sit down
00:13:15.842 --> 00:13:17.878
and say to her, you know what?
00:13:17.878 --> 00:13:18.979
This is not acceptable anymore.
00:13:18.979 --> 00:13:20.780
It's not appropriate.
00:13:20.780 --> 00:13:22.282
And even though I'm gratefulfor the friendship we had,
00:13:22.282 --> 00:13:24.651
you have twice crosseda boundary, and lied,
00:13:24.651 --> 00:13:28.388
to continue somethingthat is not healthy.
00:13:28.388 --> 00:13:31.391
And for probably three, four,five, six years after that,
00:13:31.391 --> 00:13:35.195
I would still get calls,and I would say, I'm sorry.
00:13:35.195 --> 00:13:38.565
'Cause there's sometimeswhen you have to cut off
00:13:38.565 --> 00:13:41.334
something that's not healthy.
00:13:41.334 --> 00:13:42.769
- And it was toxic.
00:13:42.769 --> 00:13:44.404
- It's not that you don'tcare for the person,
00:13:44.404 --> 00:13:46.373
but it's just what they'rebringing into your life.
00:13:46.373 --> 00:13:49.042
And particularly thefirst years of marriage,
00:13:49.042 --> 00:13:51.511
where you want to protectthat relationship,
00:13:51.511 --> 00:13:54.247
and it was hard for meto do, but I had to say,
00:13:54.247 --> 00:13:56.416
you know what?
00:13:56.416 --> 00:13:57.250
This is not healthy.
00:13:57.250 --> 00:13:58.785
- But see, that's actuallyhow you break soul ties,
00:13:58.785 --> 00:14:01.421
because, again, youjust have to remember,
00:14:01.421 --> 00:14:03.290
it's your mind, yourwill, and your emotions.
00:14:03.290 --> 00:14:04.958
So you have to first, youhave to protect your mind,
00:14:04.958 --> 00:14:08.094
protect your thoughts,that could involve blocking
00:14:08.094 --> 00:14:11.131
somebody, that couldmean unfriending,
00:14:11.131 --> 00:14:13.199
that could mean sitting downand having a conversation,
00:14:13.199 --> 00:14:15.268
like, this just isn't working.
00:14:15.268 --> 00:14:16.770
And then you have toprotect your feelings,
00:14:16.770 --> 00:14:18.305
because there are people whowill play on your emotions.
00:14:18.305 --> 00:14:21.141
They just, they know yourbuttons, and you have
00:14:21.141 --> 00:14:24.077
to set boundaries tosay, you know what?
00:14:24.077 --> 00:14:26.012
- Or manipulate.
00:14:26.012 --> 00:14:26.947
- Or they'll manipulate you.
00:14:26.947 --> 00:14:28.148
And then I think it'sall about, again,
00:14:28.148 --> 00:14:30.283
what you do too.
00:14:30.283 --> 00:14:31.551
Because, like you said,you just had to sit down
00:14:31.551 --> 00:14:33.653
with her and say, you know what?
00:14:33.653 --> 00:14:34.487
This isn't gonna work.
00:14:34.487 --> 00:14:35.655
But you have tochange your thoughts,
00:14:35.655 --> 00:14:36.990
you have to changeyour feelings,
00:14:36.990 --> 00:14:38.491
you have to change whatyou do and what you allow,
00:14:38.491 --> 00:14:40.226
and that means(soft new age music)
00:14:40.226 --> 00:14:41.161
setting boundaries.
00:14:41.161 --> 00:14:43.663
That's how you resolve it.
00:14:43.663 --> 00:14:45.532
- I think sometimespeople can make us feel
00:14:45.532 --> 00:14:50.303
so responsible for them.
00:14:50.303 --> 00:14:53.273
And I think that's whenpeople cross the line.
00:14:54.441 --> 00:14:57.777
I am not betweenanybody and God.
00:14:59.579 --> 00:15:03.717
And we have got to step outof the way, in some cases,
00:15:03.717 --> 00:15:08.588
and let them have theirown communication with God,
00:15:08.588 --> 00:15:12.525
let them have their ownexperience with God,
00:15:12.525 --> 00:15:15.729
and don't ever put someonebetween you and God.
00:15:15.729 --> 00:15:19.733
Because there is noplace for man there.
00:15:20.934 --> 00:15:23.970
- I started traveling withmy parents when I was nine
00:15:25.438 --> 00:15:27.007
years old, and so whenI got my record deal,
00:15:27.007 --> 00:15:29.676
I started traveling, inbuses, and going on tours,
00:15:29.676 --> 00:15:32.245
and there were a bunchof men on the road,
00:15:32.245 --> 00:15:34.981
so I had to travelwith my mother.
00:15:34.981 --> 00:15:37.217
So of course, my mom had totake care of her little girl.
00:15:37.217 --> 00:15:39.986
- Which is normal, which is,
00:15:39.986 --> 00:15:41.287
that part is normal.- It's the way
00:15:41.287 --> 00:15:42.789
it should be, you shouldhave your mother with you
00:15:42.789 --> 00:15:45.025
when you're 14, 15, 16, witha bunch of men all the time.
00:15:45.025 --> 00:15:49.095
Not that anythingweird, just to be there.
00:15:49.095 --> 00:15:51.898
- A protective layer.
00:15:51.898 --> 00:15:53.800
- So fast forward, when Iwas 23, I accidentally got
00:15:53.800 --> 00:15:57.904
married andintentionally divorced.
00:15:57.904 --> 00:16:00.440
- I accidentally got married.
00:16:01.941 --> 00:16:03.910
- I'll get into thatlater. (shared laughing)
00:16:03.910 --> 00:16:05.745
Accidentally married andintentionally divorced.
00:16:05.745 --> 00:16:08.782
In that marriage, my soulwas never tied to him,
00:16:08.782 --> 00:16:12.218
because I knew it was amistake from the moment
00:16:12.218 --> 00:16:14.421
I married him.
00:16:14.421 --> 00:16:15.355
But, I remember, whenI was frustrated,
00:16:16.756 --> 00:16:19.993
or sad or something, Iwould go to my mom's house,
00:16:19.993 --> 00:16:23.196
because she was the safeplace, she was really,
00:16:23.196 --> 00:16:27.567
she was home.
00:16:27.567 --> 00:16:29.135
She was still my spiritualcovering, because this man
00:16:29.135 --> 00:16:32.972
was not really a believer.
00:16:32.972 --> 00:16:34.841
Now fast forward, I'mintentionally divorced,
00:16:34.841 --> 00:16:36.476
and I marry the most amazingman, my husband Nick,
00:16:36.476 --> 00:16:40.280
and I remember thefirst year of marriage,
00:16:41.381 --> 00:16:43.616
it was a struggle gettingthat tie to my mother severed,
00:16:43.616 --> 00:16:48.621
so I could truly betied to my husband.
00:16:49.823 --> 00:16:52.492
It was hard; and, there arestill moments it's so hard
00:16:52.492 --> 00:16:55.995
because I seek herapproval so much.
00:16:55.995 --> 00:16:59.365
I want her so muchto be proud of me,
00:16:59.365 --> 00:17:01.401
and think I'm a greatwife and a great mom,
00:17:01.401 --> 00:17:03.803
but I don't need her approval.
00:17:05.705 --> 00:17:07.707
She's mom, and I loveher, and I will honor her,
00:17:09.109 --> 00:17:11.711
and I am so blessedthat she's my mother,
00:17:11.711 --> 00:17:14.447
but I am with this man.
00:17:14.447 --> 00:17:17.550
We are one, together.
00:17:17.550 --> 00:17:19.586
- You're leaving and cleaving.
00:17:19.586 --> 00:17:21.020
- Yes, and I never realizedthat that was actually
00:17:21.020 --> 00:17:23.790
what was going on, untilthis word came into my life.
00:17:23.790 --> 00:17:27.560
- Wow.
00:17:27.560 --> 00:17:28.728
- Yes, isn't that,it's fascinating to me.
00:17:28.728 --> 00:17:30.864
And so, I didn't realizethat that's what I had
00:17:30.864 --> 00:17:34.467
been doing over thecourse of this timeframe
00:17:34.467 --> 00:17:36.669
in our marriage, and howI never even had that
00:17:36.669 --> 00:17:40.373
in the first marriage.
00:17:40.373 --> 00:17:41.875
Never was truly tied tohim because I could never
00:17:41.875 --> 00:17:43.743
let go of this.
00:17:43.743 --> 00:17:45.245
- When you have someonenow coming alongside you,
00:17:45.245 --> 00:17:49.082
there's a bond that happens,there's a chemical reaction,
00:17:49.082 --> 00:17:53.119
it happens in intimacy,in the act of marriage,
00:17:53.119 --> 00:17:56.723
the act of sex, andalso it happens,
00:17:56.723 --> 00:17:59.526
and that's a healthyconnection, because of course
00:17:59.526 --> 00:18:01.528
you're gonna consummateyour marriage.
00:18:01.528 --> 00:18:03.296
And so, that happens there,but Havilah Cunnington
00:18:03.296 --> 00:18:06.599
has a great curriculumcalled Moral Revolution,
00:18:06.599 --> 00:18:10.170
and she explainsthe process of that.
00:18:10.170 --> 00:18:12.438
So, this chemical reactionthat happens, the bonding
00:18:12.438 --> 00:18:15.341
that happens between amother and father to a child,
00:18:15.341 --> 00:18:19.078
where it happenswhen you're married,
00:18:19.078 --> 00:18:23.216
it happens in friendship,the bond, the connection,
00:18:23.216 --> 00:18:26.252
but that bond issupposed to be broken
00:18:26.252 --> 00:18:28.955
when you marry someone,and leaving your family.
00:18:28.955 --> 00:18:32.959
And the unhealthy flow, it'salmost like an umbilical cord,
00:18:32.959 --> 00:18:36.095
if you don't detach, alife flows through that.
00:18:36.095 --> 00:18:40.099
It flows into that person, itflows into that connection,
00:18:40.099 --> 00:18:43.269
it flows into that relationship.
00:18:43.269 --> 00:18:45.271
So whether good orbad, it's not helpful,
00:18:45.271 --> 00:18:48.074
especially in the processof bonding with your husband
00:18:48.074 --> 00:18:52.612
or your wife, andit happened with us,
00:18:52.612 --> 00:18:54.781
it was a unhealthy connection
00:18:54.781 --> 00:18:56.616
my husband had with his mom.
00:18:56.616 --> 00:18:58.785
- Interesting.
00:18:58.785 --> 00:19:00.119
- Let's talk aboutthat. (shared laughing)
00:19:00.119 --> 00:19:04.924
- Because the connection,it's, now you're in
00:19:04.924 --> 00:19:08.127
the consulting phase ofbeing a parent where,
00:19:08.127 --> 00:19:12.599
before he got married,that will always happen,
00:19:12.599 --> 00:19:15.235
but now the interactionwill be less when you do
00:19:15.235 --> 00:19:19.172
get married, so the benefitsof, you have all that time
00:19:19.172 --> 00:19:22.375
with your child, awesome,but in the process
00:19:22.375 --> 00:19:24.677
of bonding withyour new partner,
00:19:24.677 --> 00:19:26.546
it becomes a challenge.
00:19:26.546 --> 00:19:28.047
Then all of a sudden(soft new age music)
00:19:28.047 --> 00:19:29.015
it's not just one woman,
00:19:29.015 --> 00:19:30.350
now you have two women.(shared laughing)
00:19:30.350 --> 00:19:33.586
- Yeah, I do not want tobe that mother in law.
00:19:33.586 --> 00:19:36.222
I had a beautiful exampleof a mother in law,
00:19:37.590 --> 00:19:41.561
and I want to replicate that.
00:19:41.561 --> 00:19:44.831
I want to be supportive,
00:19:44.831 --> 00:19:46.566
I want to be as muchAudrey's mama as Cody's mom,
00:19:47.900 --> 00:19:52.572
and be there when they need me,
00:19:53.439 --> 00:19:54.674
and learn to shut mymouth when they don't.
00:19:54.674 --> 00:19:56.943
- My husband's very closeto his family as well,
00:19:58.011 --> 00:20:00.246
and that was a struggle,when we got married,
00:20:00.246 --> 00:20:02.615
because what happens is nowpeople feel like they have
00:20:02.615 --> 00:20:05.318
license to actually comein and have opinion.
00:20:05.318 --> 00:20:09.222
They feel like they havelicense because you're going
00:20:09.222 --> 00:20:11.791
to them and you're actuallyconsulting them on things
00:20:11.791 --> 00:20:15.028
that you really shouldbe looking to God for,
00:20:15.028 --> 00:20:16.829
and you should be talkingto your spouse about.
00:20:16.829 --> 00:20:18.464
- When I got married, myhusband's mom, who was
00:20:18.464 --> 00:20:22.769
emotional, I and ever hadanybody be half an inch
00:20:22.769 --> 00:20:26.306
away from my faceand yell in my face,
00:20:26.306 --> 00:20:28.408
'cause I'm Scottish,and we're just more,
00:20:28.408 --> 00:20:29.742
we're just more.
00:20:29.742 --> 00:20:30.576
So, I said to Barry, I thinkshe just feels left out,
00:20:31.978 --> 00:20:34.280
because he's an only son,and he was so close to them.
00:20:34.280 --> 00:20:37.717
In the morning I would sayto her, good morning, mom,
00:20:37.717 --> 00:20:39.585
can I get you a cup of coffee?
00:20:39.585 --> 00:20:40.553
And she would just be nothing.
00:20:40.553 --> 00:20:41.788
So on the second day,Barry said to her,
00:20:41.788 --> 00:20:43.589
listen mom, this is myhome, this is my wife,
00:20:43.589 --> 00:20:46.559
you can either talk toher, or you should go home,
00:20:46.559 --> 00:20:48.961
and she went home.
00:20:48.961 --> 00:20:49.862
And it took me years of, butit was really important to me
00:20:51.331 --> 00:20:55.034
that my husband made that clear,
00:20:55.034 --> 00:20:57.203
'cause I thought, what onearth is gonna happen here?
00:20:57.203 --> 00:20:59.138
- You will become the enemy.
00:20:59.138 --> 00:21:01.741
But he took ownershipof that time.
00:21:01.741 --> 00:21:04.977
- Man, I love that.
00:21:04.977 --> 00:21:06.512
- And said, no, this is howyou're gonna treat my wife.
00:21:06.512 --> 00:21:09.549
- And then the, it wasinteresting, 'cause in the end
00:21:09.549 --> 00:21:11.184
when she had liver cancer, Iwas the one that nursed her,
00:21:11.184 --> 00:21:14.153
I was the one that heldher until the final.
00:21:14.153 --> 00:21:16.222
And we became really close,because we'd established
00:21:16.222 --> 00:21:19.425
boundaries,appropriate boundaries.
00:21:19.425 --> 00:21:22.028
- For many of us that arepeering into this conversation,
00:21:23.396 --> 00:21:26.599
it's, can it happen?
00:21:26.599 --> 00:21:28.368
Can I live a whole life?
00:21:28.368 --> 00:21:29.635
And I'm here tosay, yes you can.
00:21:29.635 --> 00:21:31.704
Yes you can, you canhave healthy bonds,
00:21:31.704 --> 00:21:34.307
you can have healthythinking, you can have
00:21:34.307 --> 00:21:36.442
the most intimatemoments where you react
00:21:37.543 --> 00:21:39.712
in a healthfulway, you can build
00:21:39.712 --> 00:21:42.081
a healthy life, and havehealthy kids at the same time,
00:21:42.081 --> 00:21:45.118
so praise Jesus, amen.(shared laughing)
00:21:45.118 --> 00:21:47.887
(soft new age music)
00:21:47.887 --> 00:21:49.288
- Would you let me pray for you?
00:21:49.889 --> 00:21:50.857
Father God, I thank you thatyour love for us is so fierce
00:21:53.025 --> 00:21:57.997
that you would notlive without us,
00:21:59.198 --> 00:22:00.733
and that you sent your sonJesus to die in my place,
00:22:00.733 --> 00:22:04.670
in our place.
00:22:05.271 --> 00:22:06.506
I mean, Christ said,Father, punish me now,
00:22:06.506 --> 00:22:09.976
for everything thatSheila Walsh will ever do.
00:22:09.976 --> 00:22:13.379
And Lord, for thosewho are watching,
00:22:13.379 --> 00:22:15.148
I ask you now to putyour own name in there,
00:22:15.148 --> 00:22:18.351
and now Lord I wantto bring unhealthy
00:22:18.351 --> 00:22:21.287
soul ties before you.
00:22:21.287 --> 00:22:23.656
And if you're listeningto this prayer,
00:22:23.656 --> 00:22:25.224
if you're watching this,just take a moment here,
00:22:25.224 --> 00:22:28.761
and bring those names to mind.
00:22:28.761 --> 00:22:30.530
People from your past,things in your past
00:22:31.697 --> 00:22:34.000
that you don'twanna think about,
00:22:34.000 --> 00:22:35.468
but if it's something thatthe Holy Spirit brings
00:22:35.468 --> 00:22:37.770
to your mind, then just speakthat out before the Lord.
00:22:37.770 --> 00:22:42.375
And now, let's bringthe blood of Christ
00:22:42.375 --> 00:22:45.478
to cover that, andto sever that tie.
00:22:45.478 --> 00:22:48.881
Lord, I thank you thatthere is power in the name
00:22:48.881 --> 00:22:51.851
of the Lord, that there'spower in the blood of the lamb.
00:22:51.851 --> 00:22:55.621
And right now, in Jesus name,we choose, and we ask you Lord
00:22:55.621 --> 00:23:00.526
that you would sever thoseties, cut them off from us,
00:23:01.961 --> 00:23:04.163
set us free to bewhole and free,
00:23:04.163 --> 00:23:07.333
that our allegiance isto you, and to you alone.
00:23:07.333 --> 00:23:11.838
And we ask it in the powerfulname of Jesus Christ, amen.
00:23:11.838 --> 00:23:16.242
- [Announcer] You can callthe number on your screen
00:23:19.812 --> 00:23:21.547
right now to talkto a prayer partner.
00:23:21.547 --> 00:23:23.683
We're here for you 24 hoursa day, seven days a week.
00:23:23.683 --> 00:23:27.353
We love you, but mostimportantly, Jesus loves you.
00:23:27.353 --> 00:23:31.090
- The sign of stuckness,when you're trying to walk
00:23:31.090 --> 00:23:34.927
through inner healing,is when it begins to seep
00:23:34.927 --> 00:23:37.864
into your world, whenit begins to leak,
00:23:37.864 --> 00:23:40.733
in your relationships,especially for me
00:23:40.733 --> 00:23:42.702
the indicator was my marriage.
00:23:42.702 --> 00:23:44.670
You may have feltvictorious in one stage,
00:23:44.670 --> 00:23:47.773
but there's also anotherstage after that.
00:23:47.773 --> 00:23:50.276
So you don't celebrate at thebottom of the mountaintop,
00:23:50.276 --> 00:23:53.446
if I could put it that way,
00:23:53.446 --> 00:23:54.647
and when you'rescaling the mountain,
00:23:54.647 --> 00:23:55.948
you don't celebrateat a hundred feet.
00:23:55.948 --> 00:23:57.483
No, you have tocelebrate at the top.
00:23:57.483 --> 00:23:59.685
And so I think weget so enamored
00:23:59.685 --> 00:24:04.023
with little successes,but those little successes
00:24:04.023 --> 00:24:06.993
sometimes will stop inthe middle of the process,
00:24:06.993 --> 00:24:09.929
and we'll clap andapplaud ourselves,
00:24:09.929 --> 00:24:12.798
but there's still along journey after that
00:24:12.798 --> 00:24:16.135
that really needs to happen.
00:24:16.135 --> 00:24:18.204
And so, for me, Istarted to see and notice
00:24:18.204 --> 00:24:21.908
when I wasn't myself,when I began to seep into
00:24:21.908 --> 00:24:25.578
old patterns of behavior,especially in my marriage,
00:24:25.578 --> 00:24:28.781
and that pushed meto a better life,
00:24:28.781 --> 00:24:32.251
that pushed me to abetter way of thinking,
00:24:32.251 --> 00:24:34.453
that pushed me to havebetter relationships.
00:24:34.453 --> 00:24:37.557
And so, inner healing,it's so important,
00:24:37.557 --> 00:24:41.127
when you really haveto not stay stuck,
00:24:41.127 --> 00:24:44.363
but keep moving.
00:24:44.363 --> 00:24:45.865
Not stay in one place,but keep on going forward.
00:24:45.865 --> 00:24:49.035
Because if you stay stuck,you can also see in the life
00:24:49.035 --> 00:24:52.505
of Michael, in the OldTestament, she stayed stuck
00:24:52.505 --> 00:24:55.608
in a moment, and it reallycaused a deep barreness
00:24:55.608 --> 00:24:59.579
in her spirit, so to speak.
00:24:59.579 --> 00:25:01.480
And so, you never wanna bethat, you don't wanna be
00:25:01.480 --> 00:25:03.616
that kind of woman.
00:25:03.616 --> 00:25:05.117
- [Announcer] You can streambetter together episodes
00:25:05.117 --> 00:25:07.053
on the go; downloadthe TBN app to watch
00:25:07.053 --> 00:25:09.722
all of our latest conversations.
00:25:09.722 --> 00:25:11.524
Here's what's coming upnext on better together.
00:25:13.726 --> 00:25:16.862
- Our brokennessis not our burden,
00:25:16.862 --> 00:25:19.031
our brokenness is our ministry.
00:25:19.031 --> 00:25:21.033
All those things thatwe've gone through,
00:25:21.033 --> 00:25:23.302
the divorce, theabortion, the rape,
00:25:23.302 --> 00:25:25.237
the bankruptcy, all ofthat, God wants to use
00:25:25.237 --> 00:25:29.241
as a tool to free other people.
00:25:29.241 --> 00:25:32.912
- [Announcer] WatchBetter Together weekdays,
00:25:32.912 --> 00:25:34.647
and Tuesday nights, only on TBN.
00:25:34.647 --> 00:25:37.617

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What Are Soul Ties? | Better Together

What Are Soul Ties? | Better Together

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What Are Soul Ties? | Better Together

What Are Soul Ties? | Better Together

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