Better Together LIVE | Episode 191 | TBN

Better Together LIVE | Episode 191

Watch Better Together LIVE | Episode 191
February 8, 2021
25:50

Understanding how you and your spouse prefer to give and receive love is the key to growing a happy; healthy relationship. | TBN Prayer Line: 714-731-1000

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Better Together LIVE | Episode 191

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  • - LAURIE: SO WHAT MAKES
  • 00:00:02.025 --> 00:00:02.692
  • - LAURIE: SO WHAT MAKESUS FEEL LOVED?
  • 00:00:02.759 --> 00:00:03.726
  • US FEEL LOVED?MAYBE IT'S A HUG.
  • 00:00:03.793 --> 00:00:04.494
  • MAYBE IT'S A HUG.A COMPLIMENT, OR SIMPLY
  • 00:00:04.561 --> 00:00:05.261
  • A COMPLIMENT, OR SIMPLYSPENDING TIME TOGETHER.
  • 00:00:05.328 --> 00:00:05.895
  • SPENDING TIME TOGETHER.HAPPY, HEALTHY MARRIAGES
  • 00:00:05.962 --> 00:00:07.597
  • HAPPY, HEALTHY MARRIAGESARE BUILT ON UNDERSTANDING
  • 00:00:07.664 --> 00:00:09.132
  • ARE BUILT ON UNDERSTANDINGEACH OTHER'S NEEDS AND
  • 00:00:09.199 --> 00:00:10.033
  • EACH OTHER'S NEEDS ANDTODAY WE'RE LEARNING HOW
  • 00:00:10.100 --> 00:00:11.568
  • TODAY WE'RE LEARNING HOWTO LOVE.
  • 00:00:11.634 --> 00:00:12.035
  • TO LOVE.SO COME ON AND JOIN US.
  • 00:00:12.102 --> 00:00:17.574
  • SO COME ON AND JOIN US.♪ MUSIC ♪
  • 00:00:17.640 --> 00:00:23.680
  • ♪ MUSIC ♪♪ MUSIC ♪
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  • ♪ MUSIC ♪- CECE: I DON'T
  • 00:00:28.651 --> 00:00:41.264
  • - CECE: I DON'TKNOW ABOUT YOU GIRLS, BUT
  • 00:00:41.331 --> 00:00:42.532
  • KNOW ABOUT YOU GIRLS, BUTI KNOW FOR ME, LEARNING
  • 00:00:42.599 --> 00:00:44.167
  • I KNOW FOR ME, LEARNINGHOW TO LOVE THE WAY I
  • 00:00:44.234 --> 00:00:47.003
  • HOW TO LOVE THE WAY ITHOUGHT LOVE WAS TOTALLY
  • 00:00:47.070 --> 00:00:48.138
  • THOUGHT LOVE WAS TOTALLYDIFFERENT WHEN I GOT
  • 00:00:48.204 --> 00:00:49.005
  • DIFFERENT WHEN I GOTMARRIED.
  • 00:00:49.072 --> 00:00:50.807
  • MARRIED.THE IDEA OF LOVE.
  • 00:00:50.874 --> 00:00:51.307
  • THE IDEA OF LOVE.TOTALLY DIFFERENT.
  • 00:00:51.374 --> 00:00:54.978
  • TOTALLY DIFFERENT.(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:00:55.044 --> 00:00:55.512
  • (LAUGHTER)THE SCRIPTURE I WANT TO GO
  • 00:00:55.578 --> 00:00:57.147
  • THE SCRIPTURE I WANT TO GOTO IS JOHN 13:34.
  • 00:00:57.213 --> 00:00:58.715
  • TO IS JOHN 13:34.IT SAYS "A NEW COMMANDMENT
  • 00:00:58.781 --> 00:01:00.884
  • IT SAYS "A NEW COMMANDMENTI GIVE TO YOU THAT YOU
  • 00:01:00.950 --> 00:01:04.320
  • I GIVE TO YOU THAT YOULOVE ONE ANOTHER JUST AS I
  • 00:01:04.387 --> 00:01:05.355
  • LOVE ONE ANOTHER JUST AS IHAVE LOVED YOU.
  • 00:01:05.421 --> 00:01:07.957
  • HAVE LOVED YOU.YOU ALSO ARE TO LOVE ONE
  • 00:01:08.024 --> 00:01:09.526
  • YOU ALSO ARE TO LOVE ONEANOTHER."
  • 00:01:09.592 --> 00:01:12.529
  • ANOTHER."AND I THINK THAT'S THE
  • 00:01:12.595 --> 00:01:13.029
  • AND I THINK THAT'S THEPART OF THE SCRIPTURE,
  • 00:01:13.096 --> 00:01:14.464
  • PART OF THE SCRIPTURE,"JUST AS I LOVE YOU,"
  • 00:01:14.531 --> 00:01:16.499
  • "JUST AS I LOVE YOU,"THAT I HAD TO GET
  • 00:01:16.566 --> 00:01:17.300
  • THAT I HAD TO GETINTO MY HEART, INTO MY SPIRIT.
  • 00:01:17.367 --> 00:01:20.637
  • INTO MY HEART, INTO MY SPIRIT.AFTER I SAID I DO, BECAUSE
  • 00:01:20.703 --> 00:01:24.607
  • AFTER I SAID I DO, BECAUSEI KIND OF WENT INTO THIS
  • 00:01:24.674 --> 00:01:26.042
  • I KIND OF WENT INTO THISAGREEMENT WITH A WORLDLY
  • 00:01:26.109 --> 00:01:28.912
  • AGREEMENT WITH A WORLDLYDESCRIPTION OF LOVE.
  • 00:01:28.978 --> 00:01:31.014
  • DESCRIPTION OF LOVE.I WILL LOVE YOU, I WILL
  • 00:01:31.080 --> 00:01:31.548
  • I WILL LOVE YOU, I WILLSERVE YOU AS LONG AS YOU
  • 00:01:31.614 --> 00:01:32.982
  • SERVE YOU AS LONG AS YOUSERVE ME.
  • 00:01:33.049 --> 00:01:35.351
  • SERVE ME.AND YOU LOVE ME.
  • 00:01:35.418 --> 00:01:36.853
  • AND YOU LOVE ME.THE HOLY SPIRIT TOLD ME
  • 00:01:36.920 --> 00:01:40.156
  • THE HOLY SPIRIT TOLD MERIGHT AWAY, YOU ARE
  • 00:01:40.223 --> 00:01:41.291
  • RIGHT AWAY, YOU AREABSOLUTELY WRONG.
  • 00:01:41.357 --> 00:01:43.660
  • ABSOLUTELY WRONG.(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:01:43.726 --> 00:01:45.395
  • (LAUGHTER)YOU ARE TO LOVE YOUR
  • 00:01:45.461 --> 00:01:47.030
  • YOU ARE TO LOVE YOURHUSBAND AS I LOVE YOU.
  • 00:01:47.096 --> 00:01:49.032
  • HUSBAND AS I LOVE YOU.THAT IS A TOTAL SWITCH.
  • 00:01:49.098 --> 00:01:51.634
  • THAT IS A TOTAL SWITCH.THAT IS A TOTAL TURN.
  • 00:01:51.701 --> 00:01:52.835
  • THAT IS A TOTAL TURN.AND I THINK IN MARRIAGES
  • 00:01:52.902 --> 00:01:53.870
  • AND I THINK IN MARRIAGESWE ALL HAVE TO UNDERSTAND
  • 00:01:53.937 --> 00:01:56.306
  • WE ALL HAVE TO UNDERSTANDAND LEARN, RELEARN WHAT
  • 00:01:56.372 --> 00:01:58.808
  • AND LEARN, RELEARN WHATLOVE REALLY IS.
  • 00:01:58.875 --> 00:02:00.076
  • LOVE REALLY IS.I TELL PEOPLE ALL THE
  • 00:02:00.143 --> 00:02:02.679
  • I TELL PEOPLE ALL THETIME, AND I'VE BEEN
  • 00:02:02.745 --> 00:02:03.112
  • TIME, AND I'VE BEENMARRIED NOW FOR 36 YEARS,
  • 00:02:03.179 --> 00:02:04.581
  • MARRIED NOW FOR 36 YEARS,PRAISE THE LORD.
  • 00:02:04.647 --> 00:02:05.782
  • PRAISE THE LORD.- LAURIE: HALLELUJAH.
  • 00:02:05.848 --> 00:02:07.584
  • - LAURIE: HALLELUJAH.- CECE: THEY LAUGH,
  • 00:02:07.650 --> 00:02:08.618
  • - CECE: THEY LAUGH,LAURIE, I TELL THEM,
  • 00:02:08.685 --> 00:02:09.752
  • LAURIE, I TELL THEM,MARRIAGE WILL EITHER SAVE
  • 00:02:09.819 --> 00:02:11.254
  • MARRIAGE WILL EITHER SAVEYOU OR MAKE YOU BACKSLIDE.
  • 00:02:11.321 --> 00:02:13.690
  • YOU OR MAKE YOU BACKSLIDE.(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:02:13.756 --> 00:02:16.025
  • (LAUGHTER)- LAURIE: OR KILL YOU.
  • 00:02:16.092 --> 00:02:16.759
  • - LAURIE: OR KILL YOU.(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:02:16.826 --> 00:02:18.461
  • (LAUGHTER)- CECE: BECAUSE YOU
  • 00:02:18.528 --> 00:02:19.395
  • - CECE: BECAUSE YOUREALLY UNDERSTAND THAT IT
  • 00:02:19.462 --> 00:02:21.464
  • REALLY UNDERSTAND THAT ITHAS TO BE-- LOVE IS NOT
  • 00:02:21.531 --> 00:02:22.632
  • HAS TO BE-- LOVE IS NOTSELFISH.
  • 00:02:22.699 --> 00:02:23.533
  • SELFISH.IT IS TOTALLY SELFLESS.
  • 00:02:23.600 --> 00:02:25.902
  • IT IS TOTALLY SELFLESS.IT IS THE TOTAL OPPOSITE
  • 00:02:25.969 --> 00:02:26.736
  • IT IS THE TOTAL OPPOSITEOF WHAT THE WORLD, WHAT
  • 00:02:26.803 --> 00:02:28.638
  • OF WHAT THE WORLD, WHATOUR CULTURE, WHAT OUR
  • 00:02:28.705 --> 00:02:29.472
  • OUR CULTURE, WHAT OURFLESH SAYS.
  • 00:02:29.539 --> 00:02:33.109
  • FLESH SAYS.SO, I'M GONNA OPEN THIS UP
  • 00:02:33.176 --> 00:02:34.310
  • SO, I'M GONNA OPEN THIS UPTO YOU, LADIES.
  • 00:02:34.377 --> 00:02:36.379
  • TO YOU, LADIES.WHAT ABOUT YOU?
  • 00:02:36.446 --> 00:02:37.714
  • WHAT ABOUT YOU?DID YOU HAVE TO RELEARN
  • 00:02:37.780 --> 00:02:39.015
  • DID YOU HAVE TO RELEARNWHAT LOVE WAS ALL ABOUT
  • 00:02:39.082 --> 00:02:39.916
  • WHAT LOVE WAS ALL ABOUTWHEN YOU SAID I DO,
  • 00:02:39.983 --> 00:02:42.318
  • WHEN YOU SAID I DO,WHEN YOU GOT MARRIED?
  • 00:02:42.385 --> 00:02:44.153
  • WHEN YOU GOT MARRIED?- LESLIE: THE FUNNY THING
  • 00:02:44.220 --> 00:02:46.122
  • - LESLIE: THE FUNNY THINGIS, LES AND I DATED FOR
  • 00:02:46.189 --> 00:02:47.490
  • IS, LES AND I DATED FORSEVEN YEARS BEFORE WE GOT
  • 00:02:47.557 --> 00:02:48.057
  • SEVEN YEARS BEFORE WE GOTMARRIED.
  • 00:02:48.124 --> 00:02:48.558
  • MARRIED.WE THOUGHT WE WERE PROS AT
  • 00:02:48.625 --> 00:02:49.559
  • WE THOUGHT WE WERE PROS ATTHIS THING AND HAD IT
  • 00:02:49.626 --> 00:02:50.059
  • THIS THING AND HAD ITWORKED OUT.
  • 00:02:50.126 --> 00:02:51.527
  • WORKED OUT.THEN WE CROSSED THE
  • 00:02:51.594 --> 00:02:53.997
  • THEN WE CROSSED THETHRESHOLD TO MARRIED LIFE.
  • 00:02:54.063 --> 00:02:54.831
  • THRESHOLD TO MARRIED LIFE.I'LL JUST GIVE THIS AWAY
  • 00:02:54.897 --> 00:02:57.634
  • I'LL JUST GIVE THIS AWAYQUICKLY BY SAYING, YEARS
  • 00:02:57.700 --> 00:02:58.768
  • QUICKLY BY SAYING, YEARSLATER, WE WROTE A BOOK
  • 00:02:58.835 --> 00:02:59.569
  • LATER, WE WROTE A BOOKCALLED "SAVING YOUR
  • 00:02:59.636 --> 00:03:00.503
  • CALLED "SAVING YOURMARRIAGE BEFORE IT STARTS,"
  • 00:03:00.570 --> 00:03:03.106
  • MARRIAGE BEFORE IT STARTS,"AND THE FIRST SENTENCE OF
  • 00:03:03.172 --> 00:03:03.873
  • AND THE FIRST SENTENCE OFTHAT BOOK IS,
  • 00:03:03.940 --> 00:03:04.741
  • THAT BOOK IS,"WE NEVER HAD PREMARRIAGE
  • 00:03:04.807 --> 00:03:05.742
  • "WE NEVER HAD PREMARRIAGECOUNSELING, BUT WE SPENT
  • 00:03:05.808 --> 00:03:07.143
  • COUNSELING, BUT WE SPENTTHE FIRST YEAR OF OUR
  • 00:03:07.210 --> 00:03:07.977
  • THE FIRST YEAR OF OURMARRIAGE IN THERAPY."
  • 00:03:08.044 --> 00:03:10.413
  • MARRIAGE IN THERAPY."AND THAT IS THE ABSOLUTE
  • 00:03:10.480 --> 00:03:10.947
  • AND THAT IS THE ABSOLUTEGOSPEL TRUTH.
  • 00:03:11.014 --> 00:03:12.348
  • GOSPEL TRUTH.(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:03:12.415 --> 00:03:13.816
  • (LAUGHTER)IT WAS AMAZING TO US.
  • 00:03:13.883 --> 00:03:16.719
  • IT WAS AMAZING TO US.ONE OF THE THINGS THAT
  • 00:03:16.786 --> 00:03:17.854
  • ONE OF THE THINGS THATHAPPENED IN MARRIAGE, WE
  • 00:03:17.920 --> 00:03:20.857
  • HAPPENED IN MARRIAGE, WEDIDN'T KNOW THAT-- WE JUST
  • 00:03:20.923 --> 00:03:21.891
  • DIDN'T KNOW THAT-- WE JUSTLOVED EACH OTHER WHEN WE
  • 00:03:21.958 --> 00:03:22.592
  • LOVED EACH OTHER WHEN WEWERE DATING.
  • 00:03:22.659 --> 00:03:22.959
  • WERE DATING.WHEN WE GOT MARRIED, WE
  • 00:03:23.026 --> 00:03:23.793
  • WHEN WE GOT MARRIED, WESUDDENLY HAD SOME
  • 00:03:23.860 --> 00:03:24.260
  • SUDDENLY HAD SOMEUNCONSCIOUS EXPECTATIONS
  • 00:03:24.327 --> 00:03:26.629
  • UNCONSCIOUS EXPECTATIONSABOUT WHAT A LOVING
  • 00:03:26.696 --> 00:03:28.164
  • ABOUT WHAT A LOVINGHUSBAND AND A LOVING WIFE
  • 00:03:28.231 --> 00:03:28.731
  • HUSBAND AND A LOVING WIFEWAS LIKE AND WE DIDN'T
  • 00:03:28.798 --> 00:03:29.966
  • WAS LIKE AND WE DIDN'TALWAYS LIVE UP TO EACH
  • 00:03:30.033 --> 00:03:31.334
  • ALWAYS LIVE UP TO EACHOTHER'S SCRIPTS.
  • 00:03:31.401 --> 00:03:33.236
  • OTHER'S SCRIPTS.IT WAS KIND OF A SHOCK TO
  • 00:03:33.303 --> 00:03:35.471
  • IT WAS KIND OF A SHOCK TODISCOVER THAT.
  • 00:03:35.538 --> 00:03:36.272
  • DISCOVER THAT.SOMEONE YOU THOUGHT YOU
  • 00:03:36.339 --> 00:03:38.041
  • SOMEONE YOU THOUGHT YOUKNEW SO WELL AND YET THEY
  • 00:03:38.107 --> 00:03:39.909
  • KNEW SO WELL AND YET THEYWEREN'T MAKING YOU FEEL
  • 00:03:39.976 --> 00:03:40.476
  • WEREN'T MAKING YOU FEELLOVED IN THE WAY YOU WERE
  • 00:03:40.543 --> 00:03:41.644
  • LOVED IN THE WAY YOU WEREHARDWIRED TO LOVE.
  • 00:03:41.711 --> 00:03:44.047
  • HARDWIRED TO LOVE.I MEAN, FOR ME, ONE OF THE
  • 00:03:44.113 --> 00:03:45.481
  • I MEAN, FOR ME, ONE OF THETHINGS WAS, I WASN'T A
  • 00:03:45.548 --> 00:03:46.949
  • THINGS WAS, I WASN'T AGREAT NAVIGATOR.
  • 00:03:47.016 --> 00:03:47.617
  • GREAT NAVIGATOR.I DIDN'T THINK THAT
  • 00:03:47.684 --> 00:03:48.318
  • I DIDN'T THINK THATMATTERED.
  • 00:03:48.384 --> 00:03:49.352
  • MATTERED.MY DAD DID THE MAPS IN MY
  • 00:03:49.419 --> 00:03:50.453
  • MY DAD DID THE MAPS IN MYLIFE GROWING UP.
  • 00:03:50.520 --> 00:03:51.754
  • LIFE GROWING UP.BUT LES WAS DISAPPOINTED
  • 00:03:51.821 --> 00:03:53.389
  • BUT LES WAS DISAPPOINTEDEVERY TIME WE CLIMBED IN A
  • 00:03:53.456 --> 00:03:55.958
  • EVERY TIME WE CLIMBED IN ACAR AND I DIDN'T DO THE MAPS.
  • 00:03:56.025 --> 00:03:57.593
  • CAR AND I DIDN'T DO THE MAPS.AND EVERY LITTLE KID
  • 00:03:57.660 --> 00:03:58.961
  • AND EVERY LITTLE KIDLISTENING TO US UNDER 55
  • 00:03:59.028 --> 00:04:01.364
  • LISTENING TO US UNDER 55GOES, WHAT DOES THAT
  • 00:04:01.431 --> 00:04:01.798
  • GOES, WHAT DOES THATMATTER?
  • 00:04:01.864 --> 00:04:02.765
  • MATTER?YOU JUST PUT IT IN
  • 00:04:02.832 --> 00:04:03.232
  • YOU JUST PUT IT INYOUR PHONE.
  • 00:04:03.299 --> 00:04:04.534
  • YOUR PHONE.WE USED TO LIVE IN THE
  • 00:04:04.600 --> 00:04:05.702
  • WE USED TO LIVE IN THEWILD AND IT WAS CRAZY OUT
  • 00:04:05.768 --> 00:04:06.302
  • WILD AND IT WAS CRAZY OUTTHERE.
  • 00:04:06.369 --> 00:04:07.403
  • THERE.AND MAPS MATTERED.
  • 00:04:07.470 --> 00:04:08.971
  • AND MAPS MATTERED.- CECE: THAT IS ONE OF
  • 00:04:09.038 --> 00:04:11.774
  • - CECE: THAT IS ONE OFTHE BEST WAYS TO FIND OUT
  • 00:04:11.841 --> 00:04:13.409
  • THE BEST WAYS TO FIND OUTIF YOU REALLY LOVE YOUR
  • 00:04:13.476 --> 00:04:14.043
  • IF YOU REALLY LOVE YOURPARTNER IS TO GET LOST IN
  • 00:04:14.110 --> 00:04:15.978
  • PARTNER IS TO GET LOST INTHE CAR.
  • 00:04:16.045 --> 00:04:16.479
  • THE CAR.WE ALL KNOW ABOUT MEN AND
  • 00:04:16.546 --> 00:04:18.247
  • WE ALL KNOW ABOUT MEN ANDDIRECTIONS AND US WANTING
  • 00:04:18.314 --> 00:04:20.016
  • DIRECTIONS AND US WANTINGTO GET THERE.
  • 00:04:20.083 --> 00:04:22.352
  • TO GET THERE.SO THAT IS HUGE THAT YOU
  • 00:04:22.418 --> 00:04:23.853
  • SO THAT IS HUGE THAT YOUGUYS MADE THROUGH THAT.
  • 00:04:23.920 --> 00:04:24.787
  • GUYS MADE THROUGH THAT.WHAT ABOUT ANYBODY ELSE?
  • 00:04:24.854 --> 00:04:27.256
  • WHAT ABOUT ANYBODY ELSE?JAMIE, DID YOU UNDERSTAND
  • 00:04:27.323 --> 00:04:29.525
  • JAMIE, DID YOU UNDERSTANDHOW TO EXPRESS LOVE BEFORE
  • 00:04:29.592 --> 00:04:32.095
  • HOW TO EXPRESS LOVE BEFOREYOU GOT MARRIED OR WHEN
  • 00:04:32.161 --> 00:04:32.762
  • YOU GOT MARRIED OR WHENYOU GOT MARRIED?
  • 00:04:32.829 --> 00:04:33.529
  • YOU GOT MARRIED?- JAMIE: YEAH.
  • 00:04:33.596 --> 00:04:33.996
  • - JAMIE: YEAH.IT'S SO CRAZY.
  • 00:04:34.063 --> 00:04:35.264
  • IT'S SO CRAZY.MY HUSBAND AND I WILL BE
  • 00:04:35.331 --> 00:04:36.399
  • MY HUSBAND AND I WILL BEMARRIED 20 YEARS THIS
  • 00:04:36.466 --> 00:04:37.200
  • MARRIED 20 YEARS THISSUMMER.
  • 00:04:37.266 --> 00:04:38.334
  • SUMMER.I LOOK BACK TO OUR FIRST
  • 00:04:38.401 --> 00:04:39.736
  • I LOOK BACK TO OUR FIRSTTEN YEARS OF MARRIAGE,
  • 00:04:39.802 --> 00:04:41.637
  • TEN YEARS OF MARRIAGE,GUYS, I DON'T KNOW IF
  • 00:04:41.704 --> 00:04:43.573
  • GUYS, I DON'T KNOW IFANYONE CAN RELATE TO THIS.
  • 00:04:43.639 --> 00:04:44.307
  • ANYONE CAN RELATE TO THIS.I WANTED TO BE LIKE THE
  • 00:04:44.374 --> 00:04:46.309
  • I WANTED TO BE LIKE THEBEST WIFE THERE EVER WAS.
  • 00:04:46.376 --> 00:04:49.045
  • BEST WIFE THERE EVER WAS.I HAD THIS IMAGINARY
  • 00:04:49.112 --> 00:04:50.313
  • I HAD THIS IMAGINARYTROPHY I WAS TRYING TO WIN
  • 00:04:50.380 --> 00:04:51.381
  • TROPHY I WAS TRYING TO WINEVERY DAY, "WIFE OF THE YEAR."
  • 00:04:51.447 --> 00:04:55.084
  • EVERY DAY, "WIFE OF THE YEAR."LOOKING BACK, FOR ME, I
  • 00:04:55.151 --> 00:04:55.618
  • LOOKING BACK, FOR ME, IWANTED TO PLAY THIS GAME
  • 00:04:55.685 --> 00:04:57.353
  • WANTED TO PLAY THIS GAMETO BE THE BEST WIFE
  • 00:04:57.420 --> 00:04:58.020
  • TO BE THE BEST WIFEBECAUSE I HAD A BIG FEAR
  • 00:04:58.087 --> 00:04:59.389
  • BECAUSE I HAD A BIG FEAROF AARON LEAVING ME.
  • 00:04:59.455 --> 00:05:01.491
  • OF AARON LEAVING ME.I WAS ALWAYS AFRAID HE WAS
  • 00:05:01.557 --> 00:05:02.759
  • I WAS ALWAYS AFRAID HE WASGOING TO LEAVE ME.
  • 00:05:02.825 --> 00:05:03.960
  • GOING TO LEAVE ME.IT IS WEIRD.
  • 00:05:04.026 --> 00:05:04.861
  • IT IS WEIRD.I DON'T KNOW IF A LOT OF
  • 00:05:04.927 --> 00:05:05.661
  • I DON'T KNOW IF A LOT OFPEOPLE STRUGGLE WITH THIS
  • 00:05:05.728 --> 00:05:06.662
  • PEOPLE STRUGGLE WITH THISOR NOT.
  • 00:05:06.729 --> 00:05:07.063
  • OR NOT.BUT THAT WAS ALWAYS THERE.
  • 00:05:07.130 --> 00:05:08.431
  • BUT THAT WAS ALWAYS THERE.FOR ME, I WAS GOING TO
  • 00:05:08.498 --> 00:05:09.198
  • FOR ME, I WAS GOING TOLOVE AARON HOWEVER I
  • 00:05:09.265 --> 00:05:10.733
  • LOVE AARON HOWEVER INEEDED TO DO THAT SO THAT
  • 00:05:10.800 --> 00:05:12.668
  • NEEDED TO DO THAT SO THATHE WOULD NEVER LEAVE ME.
  • 00:05:12.735 --> 00:05:13.202
  • HE WOULD NEVER LEAVE ME.AND ABOUT TEN YEARS INTO
  • 00:05:13.269 --> 00:05:15.238
  • AND ABOUT TEN YEARS INTOOUR MARRIAGE THE HOLY
  • 00:05:15.304 --> 00:05:15.738
  • OUR MARRIAGE THE HOLYSPIRIT WAS LIKE, YOU LOVE
  • 00:05:15.805 --> 00:05:17.707
  • SPIRIT WAS LIKE, YOU LOVEHIM JUST FOR THAT.
  • 00:05:17.774 --> 00:05:19.008
  • HIM JUST FOR THAT.WHAT ABOUT THE FACT THAT
  • 00:05:19.075 --> 00:05:20.676
  • WHAT ABOUT THE FACT THATGOD SAYS, WE LOVE OTHER
  • 00:05:20.743 --> 00:05:22.678
  • GOD SAYS, WE LOVE OTHERPEOPLE BECAUSE I LOVED YOU
  • 00:05:22.745 --> 00:05:24.046
  • PEOPLE BECAUSE I LOVED YOUFIRST?
  • 00:05:24.113 --> 00:05:24.881
  • FIRST?AND I HAD THIS SWITCH IN
  • 00:05:24.947 --> 00:05:27.417
  • AND I HAD THIS SWITCH INMY LIFE.
  • 00:05:27.483 --> 00:05:27.917
  • MY LIFE.LISTEN, I STILL WANT TO BE
  • 00:05:27.984 --> 00:05:28.484
  • LISTEN, I STILL WANT TO BEA GOOD WIFE.
  • 00:05:28.551 --> 00:05:29.018
  • A GOOD WIFE.ALL THE THINGS.
  • 00:05:29.085 --> 00:05:30.119
  • ALL THE THINGS.BUT I WANT TO BE A GOOD
  • 00:05:30.186 --> 00:05:30.887
  • BUT I WANT TO BE A GOODWIFE NOW BECAUSE GOD LOVES
  • 00:05:30.953 --> 00:05:33.222
  • WIFE NOW BECAUSE GOD LOVESME SO MUCH, I SHOULD IN
  • 00:05:33.289 --> 00:05:34.357
  • ME SO MUCH, I SHOULD INTURN LOVE MY HUSBAND SO
  • 00:05:34.424 --> 00:05:35.124
  • TURN LOVE MY HUSBAND SOMUCH.
  • 00:05:35.191 --> 00:05:36.192
  • MUCH.I KIND OF HAD TO SWITCH
  • 00:05:36.259 --> 00:05:37.794
  • I KIND OF HAD TO SWITCHAND THE WHOLE IMAGINARY
  • 00:05:37.860 --> 00:05:39.529
  • AND THE WHOLE IMAGINARYCONTEST OF WIFE OF THE
  • 00:05:39.595 --> 00:05:40.730
  • CONTEST OF WIFE OF THEYEAR DOESN'T EXIST.
  • 00:05:40.797 --> 00:05:42.398
  • YEAR DOESN'T EXIST.THERE IS NO CEREMONY EVERY
  • 00:05:42.465 --> 00:05:43.499
  • THERE IS NO CEREMONY EVERYYEAR.
  • 00:05:43.566 --> 00:05:44.634
  • YEAR.I WAS PLAYING THIS REALLY
  • 00:05:44.700 --> 00:05:45.668
  • I WAS PLAYING THIS REALLYSICK GAME ON MYSELF EVERY
  • 00:05:45.735 --> 00:05:46.335
  • SICK GAME ON MYSELF EVERYSINGLE DAY.
  • 00:05:46.402 --> 00:05:46.869
  • SINGLE DAY.BUT, CECE, LIKE YOU WERE
  • 00:05:46.936 --> 00:05:48.704
  • BUT, CECE, LIKE YOU WERESAYING, I HAD TO LEARN
  • 00:05:48.771 --> 00:05:50.339
  • SAYING, I HAD TO LEARNWHAT DOES LOVE LOOK LIKE
  • 00:05:50.406 --> 00:05:50.873
  • WHAT DOES LOVE LOOK LIKEIN A MARRIAGE?
  • 00:05:50.940 --> 00:05:54.110
  • IN A MARRIAGE?AND JUST TO GIVE IT AWAY,
  • 00:05:54.177 --> 00:05:54.677
  • AND JUST TO GIVE IT AWAY,I THINK IT LOOKS ABOUT
  • 00:05:54.744 --> 00:05:55.778
  • I THINK IT LOOKS ABOUTWHAT JESUS TALKS ABOUT
  • 00:05:55.845 --> 00:05:58.181
  • WHAT JESUS TALKS ABOUTLOVING ALL THE TIME.
  • 00:05:58.247 --> 00:05:58.815
  • LOVING ALL THE TIME.NOW YOU HAVE TO DO IT DAY
  • 00:05:58.881 --> 00:06:00.416
  • NOW YOU HAVE TO DO IT DAYAFTER DAY AFTER DAY WITH
  • 00:06:00.483 --> 00:06:00.950
  • AFTER DAY AFTER DAY WITHTHE SAME PERSON MAKING THE
  • 00:06:01.017 --> 00:06:01.784
  • THE SAME PERSON MAKING THESAME MISTAKES.
  • 00:06:01.851 --> 00:06:03.586
  • SAME MISTAKES.BUT I HAD TO REDEFINE WHAT
  • 00:06:03.653 --> 00:06:05.888
  • BUT I HAD TO REDEFINE WHATIT MEANT TO LOVE AND WHY I
  • 00:06:05.955 --> 00:06:07.523
  • IT MEANT TO LOVE AND WHY INEEDED TO LOVE MY HUSBAND.
  • 00:06:07.590 --> 00:06:08.157
  • NEEDED TO LOVE MY HUSBAND.- CECE: I THINK THAT IS
  • 00:06:08.224 --> 00:06:09.358
  • - CECE: I THINK THAT ISSO HUGE.
  • 00:06:09.425 --> 00:06:10.493
  • SO HUGE.I'M SURE, DR. LESLIE, YOU
  • 00:06:10.560 --> 00:06:12.028
  • I'M SURE, DR. LESLIE, YOUCAN JUMP IN ANY TIME SINCE
  • 00:06:12.094 --> 00:06:12.562
  • CAN JUMP IN ANY TIME SINCEYOU ARE THE EXPERT ON
  • 00:06:12.628 --> 00:06:13.062
  • YOU ARE THE EXPERT ONTHIS.
  • 00:06:13.129 --> 00:06:16.699
  • THIS.- LESLIE: THE EXPERT IN
  • 00:06:16.766 --> 00:06:17.233
  • - LESLIE: THE EXPERT INTHERAPY.
  • 00:06:17.300 --> 00:06:17.800
  • THERAPY.(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:06:17.867 --> 00:06:19.402
  • (LAUGHTER)- CECE: BUT I LOVE WHAT
  • 00:06:19.469 --> 00:06:20.736
  • - CECE: BUT I LOVE WHATJAMIE JUST SAID BECAUSE I
  • 00:06:20.803 --> 00:06:22.104
  • JAMIE JUST SAID BECAUSE ITHINK IT'S SO IMPORTANT
  • 00:06:22.171 --> 00:06:22.638
  • THINK IT'S SO IMPORTANTFOR US AS WIVES AND
  • 00:06:22.705 --> 00:06:24.674
  • FOR US AS WIVES ANDHUSBANDS TO UNDERSTAND
  • 00:06:24.740 --> 00:06:27.076
  • HUSBANDS TO UNDERSTANDTHAT LOVING ONE ANOTHER
  • 00:06:27.143 --> 00:06:30.446
  • THAT LOVING ONE ANOTHEROUT OF OUR OWN STRENGTH OR
  • 00:06:30.513 --> 00:06:32.281
  • OUT OF OUR OWN STRENGTH ORJUST BECAUSE WE WANT TO
  • 00:06:32.348 --> 00:06:33.983
  • JUST BECAUSE WE WANT TOHAVE A GOOD MARRIAGE OR
  • 00:06:34.050 --> 00:06:35.785
  • HAVE A GOOD MARRIAGE ORLIKE JAMIE WAS SAYING, SO
  • 00:06:35.852 --> 00:06:38.020
  • LIKE JAMIE WAS SAYING, SOSHE WOULD BE THE BEST WIFE
  • 00:06:38.087 --> 00:06:39.689
  • SHE WOULD BE THE BEST WIFEEVER, IT IS NOT THE RIGHT
  • 00:06:39.755 --> 00:06:41.157
  • EVER, IT IS NOT THE RIGHTREASON AND THE RIGHT
  • 00:06:41.224 --> 00:06:42.291
  • REASON AND THE RIGHTPURPOSE.
  • 00:06:42.358 --> 00:06:43.192
  • PURPOSE.SO, CAN YOU SPEAK ON THAT
  • 00:06:43.259 --> 00:06:44.293
  • SO, CAN YOU SPEAK ON THATOR SOMEBODY?
  • 00:06:44.360 --> 00:06:45.628
  • OR SOMEBODY?I THINK THAT IS HUGE AND
  • 00:06:45.695 --> 00:06:48.097
  • I THINK THAT IS HUGE ANDWE CAN HELP SOMEBODY TODAY
  • 00:06:48.164 --> 00:06:49.532
  • WE CAN HELP SOMEBODY TODAYTO UNDERSTAND.
  • 00:06:49.599 --> 00:06:51.200
  • TO UNDERSTAND.- LESLIE: YEAH, THAT'S
  • 00:06:51.267 --> 00:06:51.734
  • - LESLIE: YEAH, THAT'SHUGE.
  • 00:06:51.801 --> 00:06:52.201
  • HUGE.- CECE: YEAH.
  • 00:06:52.268 --> 00:06:53.703
  • - CECE: YEAH.- LESLIE: YOU REALLY HIT
  • 00:06:53.769 --> 00:06:54.270
  • - LESLIE: YOU REALLY HITTHE NAIL ON THE HEAD.
  • 00:06:54.337 --> 00:06:55.805
  • THE NAIL ON THE HEAD.BECAUSE WE ALL HAVE THIS
  • 00:06:55.872 --> 00:06:56.639
  • BECAUSE WE ALL HAVE THISDEEP LONGING NOR BELONGING
  • 00:06:56.706 --> 00:06:58.441
  • DEEP LONGING NOR BELONGINGAND SECURITY.
  • 00:06:58.508 --> 00:06:58.908
  • AND SECURITY.LIKE YOU SAID, YOU DID NOT
  • 00:06:58.975 --> 00:07:00.810
  • LIKE YOU SAID, YOU DID NOTWANT HIM TO LEAVE YOU.
  • 00:07:00.877 --> 00:07:02.612
  • WANT HIM TO LEAVE YOU.SOME OF US, OUR PARENTS
  • 00:07:02.678 --> 00:07:04.480
  • SOME OF US, OUR PARENTSARE DIVORCED.
  • 00:07:04.547 --> 00:07:06.015
  • ARE DIVORCED.SO WE HAVE A DEEP ANXIETY
  • 00:07:06.082 --> 00:07:07.550
  • SO WE HAVE A DEEP ANXIETYWHAT MIGHT HAPPEN FOR ME.
  • 00:07:07.617 --> 00:07:08.684
  • WHAT MIGHT HAPPEN FOR ME.BUT EVERYONE, NO MATTER
  • 00:07:08.751 --> 00:07:10.219
  • BUT EVERYONE, NO MATTERWHAT YOUR STORY IS, EVEN
  • 00:07:10.286 --> 00:07:11.721
  • WHAT YOUR STORY IS, EVENFROM THE BEST FAMILY OF
  • 00:07:11.787 --> 00:07:13.155
  • FROM THE BEST FAMILY OFORIGIN EVER, WE HAVE A
  • 00:07:13.222 --> 00:07:14.624
  • ORIGIN EVER, WE HAVE ADEEP COMPULSION FOR
  • 00:07:14.690 --> 00:07:16.025
  • DEEP COMPULSION FORCOMPLETION.
  • 00:07:16.092 --> 00:07:17.827
  • COMPLETION.WE LOOK TO OUR SPOUSE TO
  • 00:07:17.894 --> 00:07:18.694
  • WE LOOK TO OUR SPOUSE TOMAKE US WHOLE.
  • 00:07:18.761 --> 00:07:20.296
  • MAKE US WHOLE.AND YOU ARE RIGHT IN
  • 00:07:20.363 --> 00:07:22.098
  • AND YOU ARE RIGHT INSAYING, ONLY JESUS CAN DO
  • 00:07:22.164 --> 00:07:22.932
  • SAYING, ONLY JESUS CAN DOTHAT.
  • 00:07:22.999 --> 00:07:23.566
  • THAT.AND THEN WHEN WE TURN OUR
  • 00:07:23.633 --> 00:07:25.501
  • AND THEN WHEN WE TURN OURHEART THAT DIRECTION IT
  • 00:07:25.568 --> 00:07:27.270
  • HEART THAT DIRECTION ITFREES US UP TO HAVE A MORE
  • 00:07:27.336 --> 00:07:29.639
  • FREES US UP TO HAVE A MOREAUTHENTIC PLAYFUL GENUINE
  • 00:07:29.705 --> 00:07:31.274
  • AUTHENTIC PLAYFUL GENUINELOVE AND THAT IS WHAT
  • 00:07:31.340 --> 00:07:33.042
  • LOVE AND THAT IS WHATBLESSES OUR SPOUSE.
  • 00:07:33.109 --> 00:07:34.343
  • BLESSES OUR SPOUSE.BECAUSE IT IS NOT COMING
  • 00:07:34.410 --> 00:07:35.244
  • BECAUSE IT IS NOT COMINGFROM OUR NEED.
  • 00:07:35.311 --> 00:07:36.145
  • FROM OUR NEED.IT IS COMING FROM A SELF
  • 00:07:36.212 --> 00:07:36.879
  • IT IS COMING FROM A SELFGIVING GIFT AND IT IS
  • 00:07:36.946 --> 00:07:39.415
  • GIVING GIFT AND IT ISCOMING FREELY AND WITHOUT
  • 00:07:39.482 --> 00:07:40.950
  • COMING FREELY AND WITHOUTLOTS OF STRINGS ATTACHED.
  • 00:07:41.017 --> 00:07:42.885
  • LOTS OF STRINGS ATTACHED.- LAURIE: THE SCRIPTURE
  • 00:07:42.952 --> 00:07:45.288
  • - LAURIE: THE SCRIPTUREYOU STARTED OUT WITH,
  • 00:07:45.354 --> 00:07:47.657
  • YOU STARTED OUT WITH,CECE, IS THE ONE WHERE
  • 00:07:47.723 --> 00:07:49.292
  • CECE, IS THE ONE WHEREJESUS IS TELLING HIS
  • 00:07:49.358 --> 00:07:51.093
  • JESUS IS TELLING HISDISCIPLES ABOUT HOW TO
  • 00:07:51.160 --> 00:07:52.795
  • DISCIPLES ABOUT HOW TOLOVE.
  • 00:07:52.862 --> 00:07:55.331
  • LOVE.AND HE SAYS, I'M GONNA--
  • 00:07:55.398 --> 00:07:56.666
  • AND HE SAYS, I'M GONNA--BASICALLY, THIS IS LAURIE
  • 00:07:56.732 --> 00:07:57.400
  • BASICALLY, THIS IS LAURIELINGO.
  • 00:07:57.466 --> 00:07:58.935
  • LINGO.BUT I'M GONNA TAKE ALL THE
  • 00:07:59.001 --> 00:08:00.603
  • BUT I'M GONNA TAKE ALL THECOMMANDMENTS AWAY AND JUST
  • 00:08:00.670 --> 00:08:01.170
  • COMMANDMENTS AWAY AND JUSTGIVE YOU ONE.
  • 00:08:01.237 --> 00:08:02.338
  • GIVE YOU ONE.AND THAT IS TO LOVE EACH
  • 00:08:02.405 --> 00:08:03.472
  • AND THAT IS TO LOVE EACHOTHER, LIKE I LOVE YOU.
  • 00:08:03.539 --> 00:08:04.006
  • OTHER, LIKE I LOVE YOU.WELL THEN, THE NEXT DAY,
  • 00:08:04.073 --> 00:08:06.309
  • WELL THEN, THE NEXT DAY,HE LAID HIS LIFE DOWN FOR
  • 00:08:06.375 --> 00:08:08.978
  • HE LAID HIS LIFE DOWN FORNOT ONLY THE PEOPLE THAT
  • 00:08:09.045 --> 00:08:11.080
  • NOT ONLY THE PEOPLE THATLOVED HIM BUT FOR HIS
  • 00:08:11.147 --> 00:08:11.647
  • LOVED HIM BUT FOR HISENEMIES.
  • 00:08:11.714 --> 00:08:12.982
  • ENEMIES.AND I THINK THAT SO
  • 00:08:13.049 --> 00:08:13.449
  • AND I THINK THAT SOPROFOUND.
  • 00:08:13.516 --> 00:08:14.717
  • PROFOUND.IF WE CAN GET ONE PERSON,
  • 00:08:14.784 --> 00:08:16.953
  • IF WE CAN GET ONE PERSON,I USED TO ALWAYS SAY THIS.
  • 00:08:17.019 --> 00:08:18.521
  • I USED TO ALWAYS SAY THIS.GOD GIVES YOU ONE PERSON
  • 00:08:18.588 --> 00:08:21.791
  • GOD GIVES YOU ONE PERSONTO REALLY SERVE WELL IN
  • 00:08:21.857 --> 00:08:23.659
  • TO REALLY SERVE WELL INYOUR LIFE.
  • 00:08:23.726 --> 00:08:26.495
  • YOUR LIFE.AND I KNOW THERE IS A
  • 00:08:26.562 --> 00:08:27.396
  • AND I KNOW THERE IS AMULTITUDE OF OTHERS, BUT
  • 00:08:27.463 --> 00:08:28.798
  • MULTITUDE OF OTHERS, BUTTHERE IS ONE THAT REALLY
  • 00:08:28.864 --> 00:08:30.032
  • THERE IS ONE THAT REALLYIS THE WHOLE CENTER I
  • 00:08:30.099 --> 00:08:33.469
  • IS THE WHOLE CENTER IBELIEVE OF WHAT GOD WANTS
  • 00:08:33.536 --> 00:08:36.739
  • BELIEVE OF WHAT GOD WANTSTO DO THROUGH US, HE GIVES
  • 00:08:36.806 --> 00:08:38.107
  • TO DO THROUGH US, HE GIVESYOU YOUR SPOUSE.
  • 00:08:38.174 --> 00:08:39.475
  • YOU YOUR SPOUSE.NOT EVERYBODY HAS TO HAVE
  • 00:08:39.542 --> 00:08:40.776
  • NOT EVERYBODY HAS TO HAVEA SPOUSE.
  • 00:08:40.843 --> 00:08:41.811
  • A SPOUSE.AND GOOD FOR YOU, AS PAUL
  • 00:08:41.877 --> 00:08:43.245
  • AND GOOD FOR YOU, AS PAULSAYS, THAT'S EVEN BETTER
  • 00:08:43.312 --> 00:08:45.881
  • SAYS, THAT'S EVEN BETTERIF YOU DON'T HAVE TO MAYBE
  • 00:08:45.948 --> 00:08:47.516
  • IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO MAYBEANYBODY REALLY HAPPY.
  • 00:08:47.583 --> 00:08:48.184
  • ANYBODY REALLY HAPPY.THAT HAPPY.
  • 00:08:48.250 --> 00:08:51.487
  • THAT HAPPY.- HOSANNA: I CAN SPEAK TO
  • 00:08:51.554 --> 00:08:52.054
  • - HOSANNA: I CAN SPEAK TOTHAT.
  • 00:08:52.121 --> 00:08:53.055
  • THAT.I CAN SPEAK TO THAT FOR
  • 00:08:53.122 --> 00:08:53.990
  • I CAN SPEAK TO THAT FORSINGLE PEOPLE.
  • 00:08:54.056 --> 00:08:55.658
  • SINGLE PEOPLE.I'VE BEEN MARRIED FOR SIX
  • 00:08:55.725 --> 00:08:56.959
  • I'VE BEEN MARRIED FOR SIXYEARS.
  • 00:08:57.026 --> 00:08:58.060
  • YEARS.- LAURIE: WOO-HOO!
  • 00:08:58.127 --> 00:09:00.363
  • - LAURIE: WOO-HOO!- HOSANNA: I'VE BEEN
  • 00:09:00.429 --> 00:09:01.263
  • - HOSANNA: I'VE BEENMARRIED THE LEAST AMOUNT
  • 00:09:01.330 --> 00:09:01.998
  • MARRIED THE LEAST AMOUNTOF TIME FROM EVERYONE
  • 00:09:02.064 --> 00:09:03.199
  • OF TIME FROM EVERYONEHERE.
  • 00:09:03.265 --> 00:09:03.633
  • HERE.SO, BECAUSE OF THAT, I
  • 00:09:03.699 --> 00:09:04.500
  • SO, BECAUSE OF THAT, IHAVE MORE RECENTLY DATED
  • 00:09:04.567 --> 00:09:06.102
  • HAVE MORE RECENTLY DATEDTHAN ANYBODY ON HERE.
  • 00:09:06.168 --> 00:09:07.303
  • THAN ANYBODY ON HERE.SO I THINK I WILL SPEAK TO
  • 00:09:07.370 --> 00:09:09.171
  • SO I THINK I WILL SPEAK TOTHE SINGLE PEOPLE WHO ARE
  • 00:09:09.238 --> 00:09:13.809
  • THE SINGLE PEOPLE WHO ARENOT MARRIED YET.
  • 00:09:13.876 --> 00:09:14.343
  • NOT MARRIED YET.BUT I THINK WHEN I WAS
  • 00:09:14.410 --> 00:09:15.277
  • BUT I THINK WHEN I WASDATING A MISTAKE I MADE
  • 00:09:15.344 --> 00:09:16.879
  • DATING A MISTAKE I MADEWAS HOW I DEFINED LOVE
  • 00:09:16.946 --> 00:09:18.014
  • WAS HOW I DEFINED LOVEWHEN I WAS DATING.
  • 00:09:18.080 --> 00:09:19.215
  • WHEN I WAS DATING.I WAS DATING BOYS BASED ON
  • 00:09:19.281 --> 00:09:21.484
  • I WAS DATING BOYS BASED ONWHO I FELT THE STRONGEST
  • 00:09:21.550 --> 00:09:24.153
  • WHO I FELT THE STRONGESTFEELINGS WERE AT THE TIME
  • 00:09:24.220 --> 00:09:25.354
  • FEELINGS WERE AT THE TIMEAND SO WHEN MY FEELINGS
  • 00:09:25.421 --> 00:09:26.222
  • AND SO WHEN MY FEELINGSCHANGED, THE RELATIONSHIP
  • 00:09:26.288 --> 00:09:26.856
  • CHANGED, THE RELATIONSHIPCHANGED.
  • 00:09:26.922 --> 00:09:27.757
  • CHANGED.WHEN MY FEELINGS CHANGED
  • 00:09:27.823 --> 00:09:28.324
  • WHEN MY FEELINGS CHANGEDMY CHOICES CHANGED.
  • 00:09:28.391 --> 00:09:29.325
  • MY CHOICES CHANGED.WHEN MY FEELINGS CHANGED
  • 00:09:29.392 --> 00:09:30.826
  • WHEN MY FEELINGS CHANGEDAND THEY MAY OR MAY NOT
  • 00:09:30.893 --> 00:09:32.028
  • AND THEY MAY OR MAY NOTHAVE BEEN CHANGING ALL THE
  • 00:09:32.094 --> 00:09:33.929
  • HAVE BEEN CHANGING ALL THETIME, THEN IT JUST CHANGED
  • 00:09:33.996 --> 00:09:35.498
  • TIME, THEN IT JUST CHANGEDHOW I TREATED PEOPLE OR
  • 00:09:35.564 --> 00:09:36.532
  • HOW I TREATED PEOPLE ORCHANGED THE WAY HOW I WAS
  • 00:09:36.599 --> 00:09:37.800
  • CHANGED THE WAY HOW I WASTREATING THE BOY I WAS
  • 00:09:37.867 --> 00:09:38.567
  • TREATING THE BOY I WASDATING.
  • 00:09:38.634 --> 00:09:39.535
  • DATING.I WOULD SAY A BIG
  • 00:09:39.602 --> 00:09:41.170
  • I WOULD SAY A BIGDIFFERENCE FOR ME, WHAT I
  • 00:09:41.237 --> 00:09:42.571
  • DIFFERENCE FOR ME, WHAT ITHOUGHT LOVE WAS WHEN I
  • 00:09:42.638 --> 00:09:43.939
  • THOUGHT LOVE WAS WHEN IWAS DATING, WHICH I CAN
  • 00:09:44.006 --> 00:09:45.374
  • WAS DATING, WHICH I CANREMEMBER VERY CLEARLY AND
  • 00:09:45.441 --> 00:09:46.609
  • REMEMBER VERY CLEARLY ANDHOW I SEE LOVE NOW MORE
  • 00:09:46.676 --> 00:09:50.179
  • HOW I SEE LOVE NOW MORERECENTLY MARRIED IS THAT I
  • 00:09:50.246 --> 00:09:51.981
  • RECENTLY MARRIED IS THAT IHAD TO LEARN TO MAKE
  • 00:09:52.048 --> 00:09:54.216
  • HAD TO LEARN TO MAKECHOICES TO CHOOSE SOMEONE
  • 00:09:54.283 --> 00:09:55.785
  • CHOICES TO CHOOSE SOMEONETO, FIGHT FOR SOMEONE EVEN
  • 00:09:55.851 --> 00:09:56.986
  • TO, FIGHT FOR SOMEONE EVENWHEN I WAS NOT FEELING
  • 00:09:57.053 --> 00:09:57.520
  • WHEN I WAS NOT FEELINGLIKE IT.
  • 00:09:57.586 --> 00:10:01.357
  • LIKE IT.TO FORGIVE SOMEONE AND
  • 00:10:01.424 --> 00:10:01.857
  • TO FORGIVE SOMEONE ANDSTAND BESIDE SOMEONE EVEN
  • 00:10:01.924 --> 00:10:03.693
  • STAND BESIDE SOMEONE EVENWHEN MY FEELINGS DIDN'T
  • 00:10:03.759 --> 00:10:05.895
  • WHEN MY FEELINGS DIDN'TLINE UP WITH THAT.
  • 00:10:05.961 --> 00:10:07.663
  • LINE UP WITH THAT.SO I THINK IT IS SOMETHING
  • 00:10:07.730 --> 00:10:09.231
  • SO I THINK IT IS SOMETHINGTHAT IS STRONGER, IT IS
  • 00:10:09.298 --> 00:10:10.599
  • THAT IS STRONGER, IT ISMORE SECURE.
  • 00:10:10.666 --> 00:10:12.535
  • MORE SECURE.IT IS MORE STABLE BECAUSE
  • 00:10:12.601 --> 00:10:13.836
  • IT IS MORE STABLE BECAUSEIT IS RELYING ON SOMETHING
  • 00:10:13.903 --> 00:10:15.004
  • IT IS RELYING ON SOMETHINGSTRONGER THAN MY FEELINGS,
  • 00:10:15.071 --> 00:10:15.805
  • STRONGER THAN MY FEELINGS,PRAISE THE LORD.
  • 00:10:15.871 --> 00:10:17.907
  • PRAISE THE LORD.- CECE: PRAISE THE LORD.
  • 00:10:17.973 --> 00:10:18.808
  • - CECE: PRAISE THE LORD.- HOSANNA: I WOULD SAY
  • 00:10:18.874 --> 00:10:19.442
  • - HOSANNA: I WOULD SAYTHAT'S SOMETHING I LEARNED
  • 00:10:19.508 --> 00:10:21.577
  • THAT'S SOMETHING I LEARNEDDIFFERENTLY IN DATING AND
  • 00:10:21.644 --> 00:10:23.646
  • DIFFERENTLY IN DATING ANDJUST PICKING WHO I WANTED
  • 00:10:23.713 --> 00:10:24.980
  • JUST PICKING WHO I WANTEDTO DATE BASED ON HOW I WAS
  • 00:10:25.047 --> 00:10:26.182
  • TO DATE BASED ON HOW I WASFEELING BASED ON HOW I WAS
  • 00:10:26.248 --> 00:10:27.516
  • FEELING BASED ON HOW I WASTREATING PEOPLE, BASED ON
  • 00:10:27.583 --> 00:10:30.986
  • TREATING PEOPLE, BASED ONHOW I WAS FEELING, BUT
  • 00:10:31.053 --> 00:10:31.487
  • HOW I WAS FEELING, BUTTHEN HAVING A HUSBAND AND
  • 00:10:31.554 --> 00:10:32.054
  • THEN HAVING A HUSBAND ANDREALIZING WE ARE GOING TO
  • 00:10:32.121 --> 00:10:32.955
  • REALIZING WE ARE GOING TOCHOOSE EACH OTHER EVEN
  • 00:10:33.022 --> 00:10:34.657
  • CHOOSE EACH OTHER EVENWHEN I'M NOT MAKING YOU
  • 00:10:34.724 --> 00:10:35.291
  • WHEN I'M NOT MAKING YOUFEEL LIKE YOU WANT TO LOVE
  • 00:10:35.357 --> 00:10:35.991
  • FEEL LIKE YOU WANT TO LOVEME RIGHT NOW.
  • 00:10:36.058 --> 00:10:37.359
  • ME RIGHT NOW.THIS CHOICE WE ARE MAKING
  • 00:10:37.426 --> 00:10:37.927
  • THIS CHOICE WE ARE MAKINGACTIVELY THAT GOES BEYOND
  • 00:10:37.993 --> 00:10:38.594
  • ACTIVELY THAT GOES BEYONDOUR FEELINGS, I THINK THAT
  • 00:10:38.661 --> 00:10:39.995
  • OUR FEELINGS, I THINK THATIS WHAT MARRIAGE CHANGED
  • 00:10:40.062 --> 00:10:40.529
  • IS WHAT MARRIAGE CHANGEDMY MIND.
  • 00:10:40.596 --> 00:10:42.965
  • MY MIND.I WISH I WOULD HAVE KNOWN
  • 00:10:43.032 --> 00:10:43.532
  • I WISH I WOULD HAVE KNOWNTHAT WHEN I WAS DATING.
  • 00:10:43.599 --> 00:10:45.634
  • THAT WHEN I WAS DATING.- CECE: THAT IS GOOD.
  • 00:10:45.701 --> 00:10:46.402
  • - CECE: THAT IS GOOD.- LAURIE: THAT IS SUCH A
  • 00:10:46.469 --> 00:10:47.436
  • - LAURIE: THAT IS SUCH ADAILY THING, TOO.
  • 00:10:47.503 --> 00:10:47.903
  • DAILY THING, TOO.I REMEMBER MY MOM TELLING
  • 00:10:47.970 --> 00:10:49.438
  • I REMEMBER MY MOM TELLINGME, ONE DAY SHE LOOKED AT
  • 00:10:49.505 --> 00:10:50.973
  • ME, ONE DAY SHE LOOKED ATME AND SHE SAID, BABY, SHE
  • 00:10:51.040 --> 00:10:52.174
  • ME AND SHE SAID, BABY, SHESAID YOU KNOW THAT THIS
  • 00:10:52.241 --> 00:10:54.543
  • SAID YOU KNOW THAT THISFEELING YOU HAVE RIGHT NOW
  • 00:10:54.610 --> 00:10:55.444
  • FEELING YOU HAVE RIGHT NOWFOR MATT, SHE SAID, YOU
  • 00:10:55.511 --> 00:10:57.012
  • FOR MATT, SHE SAID, YOUWON'T FEEL THAT EVERY DAY
  • 00:10:57.079 --> 00:10:57.580
  • WON'T FEEL THAT EVERY DAYOF YOUR MARRIAGE.
  • 00:10:57.646 --> 00:10:58.814
  • OF YOUR MARRIAGE.I JUST THOUGHT, ARE YOU
  • 00:10:58.881 --> 00:11:00.883
  • I JUST THOUGHT, ARE YOUAND DAD IN TROUBLE OR
  • 00:11:00.950 --> 00:11:01.984
  • AND DAD IN TROUBLE ORSOMETHING?
  • 00:11:02.051 --> 00:11:02.485
  • SOMETHING?SHE SAID THAT GIDDY
  • 00:11:02.551 --> 00:11:06.055
  • SHE SAID THAT GIDDYFEELING YOU HAVE OF LOVE
  • 00:11:06.122 --> 00:11:07.690
  • FEELING YOU HAVE OF LOVEIS GOING TO NOT GO AWAY,
  • 00:11:07.757 --> 00:11:10.893
  • IS GOING TO NOT GO AWAY,BUT IT WILL MATURE AND IT
  • 00:11:10.960 --> 00:11:12.461
  • BUT IT WILL MATURE AND ITWILL NOT BE LIKE WHAT YOU
  • 00:11:12.528 --> 00:11:15.064
  • WILL NOT BE LIKE WHAT YOUARE THINKING ABOUT TODAY.
  • 00:11:15.131 --> 00:11:15.598
  • ARE THINKING ABOUT TODAY.YOU ARE NOT ALWAYS GOING
  • 00:11:15.664 --> 00:11:16.532
  • YOU ARE NOT ALWAYS GOINGTO HAVE THAT.
  • 00:11:16.599 --> 00:11:17.333
  • TO HAVE THAT.EVEN BEING MARRIED 36
  • 00:11:17.399 --> 00:11:20.336
  • EVEN BEING MARRIED 36YEARS THIS YEAR, IT IS A
  • 00:11:20.402 --> 00:11:21.470
  • YEARS THIS YEAR, IT IS ADAILY CHOICE.
  • 00:11:21.537 --> 00:11:22.371
  • DAILY CHOICE.IT IS A DAILY
  • 00:11:22.438 --> 00:11:23.239
  • IT IS A DAILYSURRENDERING.
  • 00:11:23.305 --> 00:11:27.109
  • SURRENDERING.I THINK PROBABLY ONE OF
  • 00:11:27.176 --> 00:11:27.643
  • I THINK PROBABLY ONE OFTHE THINGS I'VE LEARNED
  • 00:11:27.710 --> 00:11:30.846
  • THE THINGS I'VE LEARNEDMOST IN MARRIAGE, AND,
  • 00:11:30.913 --> 00:11:32.081
  • MOST IN MARRIAGE, AND,LESLEY, YOU CAN SPEAK TO
  • 00:11:32.148 --> 00:11:33.182
  • LESLEY, YOU CAN SPEAK TOTHIS, IS TO LEARN HOW TO
  • 00:11:33.249 --> 00:11:35.785
  • THIS, IS TO LEARN HOW TOLOVE SOMEONE AND NOT
  • 00:11:35.851 --> 00:11:37.686
  • LOVE SOMEONE AND NOTNECESSARILY-- I DON'T WANT
  • 00:11:37.753 --> 00:11:40.723
  • NECESSARILY-- I DON'T WANTTO SAY BE LOVED, BUT WE
  • 00:11:40.790 --> 00:11:41.557
  • TO SAY BE LOVED, BUT WEHAVE GOT TO LEARN WHAT
  • 00:11:41.624 --> 00:11:42.424
  • HAVE GOT TO LEARN WHATMAKES OUR PARTNERS TICK
  • 00:11:42.491 --> 00:11:45.594
  • MAKES OUR PARTNERS TICKINSTEAD OF ALWAYS NEEDING
  • 00:11:45.661 --> 00:11:48.430
  • INSTEAD OF ALWAYS NEEDINGTO SHOW YOU HOW I NEED TO
  • 00:11:48.497 --> 00:11:50.199
  • TO SHOW YOU HOW I NEED TOBE LOVED.
  • 00:11:50.266 --> 00:11:51.300
  • BE LOVED.IS THAT CORRECT?
  • 00:11:51.367 --> 00:11:52.368
  • IS THAT CORRECT?- LESLIE: ABSOLUTELY.
  • 00:11:52.434 --> 00:11:53.602
  • - LESLIE: ABSOLUTELY.THAT IS SO WISE, LAURIE.
  • 00:11:53.669 --> 00:11:56.472
  • THAT IS SO WISE, LAURIE.IN MY MARRIAGE, I MARRIED
  • 00:11:56.539 --> 00:11:57.039
  • IN MY MARRIAGE, I MARRIEDTHIS GUY WHO HAD GROWN UP
  • 00:11:57.106 --> 00:11:58.407
  • THIS GUY WHO HAD GROWN UPIN A HOUSEHOLD OF BROTHERS.
  • 00:11:58.474 --> 00:12:00.042
  • IN A HOUSEHOLD OF BROTHERS.AND BASICALLY HIS LOVE
  • 00:12:00.109 --> 00:12:00.976
  • AND BASICALLY HIS LOVELANGUAGE IS SARCASM,
  • 00:12:01.043 --> 00:12:03.746
  • LANGUAGE IS SARCASM,BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT THEY DID.
  • 00:12:03.813 --> 00:12:05.014
  • BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT THEY DID.THEY LOVED EACH OTHER THAT
  • 00:12:05.080 --> 00:12:05.581
  • THEY LOVED EACH OTHER THATWAY.
  • 00:12:05.648 --> 00:12:06.215
  • WAY.AND MINE IS WORDS OF
  • 00:12:06.282 --> 00:12:08.384
  • AND MINE IS WORDS OFAFFIRMATION.
  • 00:12:08.450 --> 00:12:08.984
  • AFFIRMATION.YOU CAN SEE THE GAP THERE.
  • 00:12:09.051 --> 00:12:10.786
  • YOU CAN SEE THE GAP THERE.(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:12:10.853 --> 00:12:11.687
  • (LAUGHTER)I HAD TO LEARN--
  • 00:12:11.754 --> 00:12:14.456
  • I HAD TO LEARN--- LAURIE: THAT'S ME AND
  • 00:12:14.523 --> 00:12:14.990
  • - LAURIE: THAT'S ME ANDMATT.
  • 00:12:15.057 --> 00:12:15.391
  • MATT.- LESLIE: I HAD TO GET
  • 00:12:15.457 --> 00:12:16.425
  • - LESLIE: I HAD TO GETADJUSTED AND GET A LITTLE
  • 00:12:16.492 --> 00:12:17.760
  • ADJUSTED AND GET A LITTLEMORE PLAYFUL AND BOLD, BUT
  • 00:12:17.827 --> 00:12:19.361
  • MORE PLAYFUL AND BOLD, BUTI HAD TO LEARN TO LOVE,
  • 00:12:19.428 --> 00:12:21.330
  • I HAD TO LEARN TO LOVE,EVEN WHEN I THOUGHT, JUST
  • 00:12:21.397 --> 00:12:21.964
  • EVEN WHEN I THOUGHT, JUSTSWEET TALK ME.
  • 00:12:22.031 --> 00:12:26.001
  • SWEET TALK ME.AND THERE WASN'T SWEET
  • 00:12:26.068 --> 00:12:26.502
  • AND THERE WASN'T SWEETTALK COMING.
  • 00:12:26.569 --> 00:12:27.136
  • TALK COMING.IT WAS ALL WHAT THE GUYS DO.
  • 00:12:27.203 --> 00:12:29.705
  • IT WAS ALL WHAT THE GUYS DO.AND THAT'S WHAT IT IS.
  • 00:12:29.772 --> 00:12:33.008
  • AND THAT'S WHAT IT IS.IT IS THE CHOOSING IT,
  • 00:12:33.075 --> 00:12:33.542
  • IT IS THE CHOOSING IT,EVEN WHEN, EVEN WHEN YOU
  • 00:12:33.609 --> 00:12:35.311
  • EVEN WHEN, EVEN WHEN YOUARE NOT GETTING IT BACK
  • 00:12:35.377 --> 00:12:37.680
  • ARE NOT GETTING IT BACKYOUR WAY IN A WAY THAT
  • 00:12:37.746 --> 00:12:43.152
  • YOUR WAY IN A WAY THATFILLS YOUR CUP.
  • 00:12:43.219 --> 00:12:43.652
  • FILLS YOUR CUP.WE COULDN'T DO IT WITHOUT
  • 00:12:43.719 --> 00:12:44.520
  • WE COULDN'T DO IT WITHOUTTHE HOLY SPIRIT.
  • 00:12:44.587 --> 00:12:45.020
  • THE HOLY SPIRIT.COULD WE?
  • 00:12:45.087 --> 00:12:45.654
  • COULD WE?WE LITERALLY CAN'T DO IT
  • 00:12:45.721 --> 00:12:46.422
  • WE LITERALLY CAN'T DO ITWITHOUT THE HOLY SPIRIT.
  • 00:12:46.488 --> 00:12:47.189
  • WITHOUT THE HOLY SPIRIT.- CECE: NO.
  • 00:12:47.256 --> 00:12:47.690
  • - CECE: NO.I LOVE WHAT ALL YOU GUYS
  • 00:12:47.756 --> 00:12:48.390
  • I LOVE WHAT ALL YOU GUYSARE SAYING.
  • 00:12:48.457 --> 00:12:49.225
  • ARE SAYING.THIS IS SO GOOD.
  • 00:12:49.291 --> 00:12:49.658
  • THIS IS SO GOOD.WE CAN JUST STAY HERE.
  • 00:12:49.725 --> 00:12:51.327
  • WE CAN JUST STAY HERE.BUT WHEN YOU WERE TALKING
  • 00:12:51.393 --> 00:12:54.530
  • BUT WHEN YOU WERE TALKINGABOUT LOVING, BECAUSE HOW
  • 00:12:54.597 --> 00:12:56.498
  • ABOUT LOVING, BECAUSE HOWMANY OF US GIVE LOVE THE
  • 00:12:56.565 --> 00:12:58.767
  • MANY OF US GIVE LOVE THEWAY WE WANT TO RECEIVE IT?
  • 00:12:58.834 --> 00:13:00.836
  • WAY WE WANT TO RECEIVE IT?NOW WE SHOULD ALL LOVE THE
  • 00:13:00.903 --> 00:13:01.737
  • NOW WE SHOULD ALL LOVE THEWAY GOD LOVES, BUT,
  • 00:13:01.804 --> 00:13:04.240
  • WAY GOD LOVES, BUT,DR. LESLIE, YOU SAID
  • 00:13:04.306 --> 00:13:07.009
  • DR. LESLIE, YOU SAIDSOMETHING ABOUT YOUR
  • 00:13:07.076 --> 00:13:07.476
  • SOMETHING ABOUT YOURHUSBAND GROWING UP WITH
  • 00:13:07.543 --> 00:13:08.510
  • HUSBAND GROWING UP WITHBROTHERS, WELL, I GREW UP
  • 00:13:08.577 --> 00:13:09.078
  • BROTHERS, WELL, I GREW UPWITH SEVEN BROTHERS.
  • 00:13:09.144 --> 00:13:11.113
  • WITH SEVEN BROTHERS.AND ALL SARCASTIC.
  • 00:13:11.180 --> 00:13:11.513
  • AND ALL SARCASTIC.ALL OF US.
  • 00:13:11.580 --> 00:13:13.616
  • ALL OF US.THE WHOLE WINANS CLAN.
  • 00:13:13.682 --> 00:13:15.718
  • THE WHOLE WINANS CLAN.SO COMING INTO MY
  • 00:13:15.784 --> 00:13:18.153
  • SO COMING INTO MYMARRIAGE, THE FIRST THING
  • 00:13:18.220 --> 00:13:19.221
  • MARRIAGE, THE FIRST THINGI HAD TO REALIZE, IS HE
  • 00:13:19.288 --> 00:13:20.055
  • I HAD TO REALIZE, IS HENOT A WINANS.
  • 00:13:20.122 --> 00:13:21.023
  • NOT A WINANS.HE IS A LOVE.
  • 00:13:21.090 --> 00:13:22.725
  • HE IS A LOVE.ACTUALLY, MY LAST NAME IS
  • 00:13:22.791 --> 00:13:23.525
  • ACTUALLY, MY LAST NAME ISLOVE.
  • 00:13:23.592 --> 00:13:24.693
  • LOVE.SO I HAD TO GET THIS THING
  • 00:13:24.760 --> 00:13:25.394
  • SO I HAD TO GET THIS THINGRIGHT.
  • 00:13:25.461 --> 00:13:25.995
  • RIGHT.(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:13:26.061 --> 00:13:28.898
  • (LAUGHTER)AND I HAD TO REALIZE THAT
  • 00:13:28.964 --> 00:13:30.766
  • AND I HAD TO REALIZE THATTHE WAY I GREW UP OR HOW I
  • 00:13:30.833 --> 00:13:32.434
  • THE WAY I GREW UP OR HOW IEXPECTED, HIS WAY WAS
  • 00:13:32.501 --> 00:13:34.503
  • EXPECTED, HIS WAY WASTOTALLY DIFFERENT.
  • 00:13:34.570 --> 00:13:36.772
  • TOTALLY DIFFERENT.THAT IS SOMETHING I THINK
  • 00:13:36.839 --> 00:13:38.207
  • THAT IS SOMETHING I THINKA LOT OF PEOPLE-- IT
  • 00:13:38.274 --> 00:13:39.975
  • A LOT OF PEOPLE-- ITTHROWS THEM A CURVE
  • 00:13:40.042 --> 00:13:41.076
  • THROWS THEM A CURVEBECAUSE THIS IS THE WAY I
  • 00:13:41.143 --> 00:13:43.178
  • BECAUSE THIS IS THE WAY IRECEIVE IT, THIS IS THE
  • 00:13:43.245 --> 00:13:44.613
  • RECEIVE IT, THIS IS THEWAY I LIKE IT, BUT YOUR
  • 00:13:44.680 --> 00:13:45.180
  • WAY I LIKE IT, BUT YOURPARTNER CAN BE TOTALLY
  • 00:13:45.247 --> 00:13:46.315
  • PARTNER CAN BE TOTALLYDIFFERENT.
  • 00:13:46.382 --> 00:13:47.016
  • DIFFERENT.THAT IS WHY WE HAVE TO
  • 00:13:47.082 --> 00:13:48.617
  • THAT IS WHY WE HAVE TOLEARN-- THE BIBLE SAYS ONE
  • 00:13:48.684 --> 00:13:50.619
  • LEARN-- THE BIBLE SAYS ONEOF THE SCRIPTURES IN THE
  • 00:13:50.686 --> 00:13:52.187
  • OF THE SCRIPTURES IN THEBIBLE TELLS THE HUSBAND TO
  • 00:13:52.254 --> 00:13:53.422
  • BIBLE TELLS THE HUSBAND TODWELL WITH YOUR WIFE
  • 00:13:53.489 --> 00:13:55.291
  • DWELL WITH YOUR WIFEACCORDING TO KNOWLEDGE.
  • 00:13:55.357 --> 00:13:57.092
  • ACCORDING TO KNOWLEDGE.SO, A LOT OF TIMES,
  • 00:13:57.159 --> 00:14:00.896
  • SO, A LOT OF TIMES,LAURIE, YOU TALKED ABOUT
  • 00:14:00.963 --> 00:14:01.931
  • LAURIE, YOU TALKED ABOUTHAVING THAT ONE PERSON.
  • 00:14:01.997 --> 00:14:03.465
  • HAVING THAT ONE PERSON.GOD KNEW THAT YOU REALLY
  • 00:14:03.532 --> 00:14:04.833
  • GOD KNEW THAT YOU REALLYHAVE TO STUDY A PERSON IF
  • 00:14:04.900 --> 00:14:05.768
  • HAVE TO STUDY A PERSON IFYOU'RE GONNA LOVE THEM WELL.
  • 00:14:05.834 --> 00:14:08.170
  • YOU'RE GONNA LOVE THEM WELL.- LAURIE: YEAH.
  • 00:14:08.237 --> 00:14:10.606
  • - LAURIE: YEAH.- CECE: I DON'T KNOW
  • 00:14:10.673 --> 00:14:12.007
  • - CECE: I DON'T KNOWABOUT Y'ALL, BUT I'M LIKE
  • 00:14:12.074 --> 00:14:12.808
  • ABOUT Y'ALL, BUT I'M LIKELESLEY, WE DIDN'T HAVE
  • 00:14:12.875 --> 00:14:14.510
  • LESLEY, WE DIDN'T HAVEPREMARITAL COUNSELING.
  • 00:14:14.576 --> 00:14:15.144
  • PREMARITAL COUNSELING.THAT IS WHY TO THIS DAY,
  • 00:14:15.210 --> 00:14:16.111
  • THAT IS WHY TO THIS DAY,IF THE PEOPLE AT OUR
  • 00:14:16.178 --> 00:14:17.513
  • IF THE PEOPLE AT OURCHURCH SAY THEY DON'T WANT
  • 00:14:17.579 --> 00:14:18.213
  • CHURCH SAY THEY DON'T WANTTO GO THROUGH IT, IT'S
  • 00:14:18.280 --> 00:14:19.148
  • TO GO THROUGH IT, IT'SLIKE, WELL, I'M NOT
  • 00:14:19.214 --> 00:14:19.648
  • LIKE, WELL, I'M NOTMARRYING YOU.
  • 00:14:19.715 --> 00:14:20.582
  • MARRYING YOU.YOU KNOW WHAT?
  • 00:14:20.649 --> 00:14:21.617
  • YOU KNOW WHAT?PREMARITAL COUNSELING IS
  • 00:14:21.684 --> 00:14:22.785
  • PREMARITAL COUNSELING ISREALLY A GREAT THING.
  • 00:14:22.851 --> 00:14:26.288
  • REALLY A GREAT THING.YOU CAN MAKE IT WITHOUT
  • 00:14:26.355 --> 00:14:26.889
  • YOU CAN MAKE IT WITHOUTIT, BUT WHY?
  • 00:14:26.956 --> 00:14:27.790
  • IT, BUT WHY?WHEN YOU CAN GO IN WITH
  • 00:14:27.856 --> 00:14:29.658
  • WHEN YOU CAN GO IN WITHMORE WISDOM AND MORE
  • 00:14:29.725 --> 00:14:32.127
  • MORE WISDOM AND MOREKNOWLEDGE SO YOUR MARRIAGE
  • 00:14:32.194 --> 00:14:33.128
  • KNOWLEDGE SO YOUR MARRIAGECAN STICK AND CAN STAY.
  • 00:14:33.195 --> 00:14:34.730
  • CAN STICK AND CAN STAY.BUT LEARNING HOW TO LOVE
  • 00:14:34.797 --> 00:14:37.299
  • BUT LEARNING HOW TO LOVESOMEONE ELSE IS JUST I
  • 00:14:37.366 --> 00:14:39.401
  • SOMEONE ELSE IS JUST ITHINK A LOT OF PEOPLE
  • 00:14:39.468 --> 00:14:41.103
  • THINK A LOT OF PEOPLEDON'T EVEN REALIZE THAT
  • 00:14:41.170 --> 00:14:42.104
  • DON'T EVEN REALIZE THATWHEN THEY SAY I DO.
  • 00:14:42.171 --> 00:14:43.806
  • WHEN THEY SAY I DO.- JAMIE: YOU KNOW WHAT I
  • 00:14:43.872 --> 00:14:45.641
  • - JAMIE: YOU KNOW WHAT IFOUND, CECE, WHEN YOU TALK
  • 00:14:45.708 --> 00:14:46.942
  • FOUND, CECE, WHEN YOU TALKABOUT LEARNING HOW YOUR
  • 00:14:47.009 --> 00:14:48.243
  • ABOUT LEARNING HOW YOURSPOUSE NEEDS TO BE LOVED
  • 00:14:48.310 --> 00:14:49.044
  • SPOUSE NEEDS TO BE LOVEDIS, THE LONGER WE HAVE
  • 00:14:49.111 --> 00:14:50.612
  • IS, THE LONGER WE HAVEBEEN MARRIED, THE EASIER
  • 00:14:50.679 --> 00:14:51.981
  • BEEN MARRIED, THE EASIERIT IS FOR ME TO SLACK IN
  • 00:14:52.047 --> 00:14:55.017
  • IT IS FOR ME TO SLACK INTHAT AREA.
  • 00:14:55.084 --> 00:14:55.517
  • THAT AREA.WE HAVE FOUR KIDS, WE EACH
  • 00:14:55.584 --> 00:14:56.452
  • WE HAVE FOUR KIDS, WE EACHHAVE JOBS, WE WORK IN
  • 00:14:56.518 --> 00:14:57.720
  • HAVE JOBS, WE WORK INMINISTRY.
  • 00:14:57.786 --> 00:14:59.655
  • MINISTRY.ALL OF THE THINGS.
  • 00:14:59.722 --> 00:15:01.090
  • ALL OF THE THINGS.THE FIRST THING USUALLY TO
  • 00:15:01.156 --> 00:15:03.359
  • THE FIRST THING USUALLY TOGO IS FOR ME TO REALIZE,
  • 00:15:03.425 --> 00:15:05.060
  • GO IS FOR ME TO REALIZE,HOW DOES AARON NEED TO BE
  • 00:15:05.127 --> 00:15:05.627
  • HOW DOES AARON NEED TO BELOVED?
  • 00:15:05.694 --> 00:15:06.562
  • LOVED?HE NEEDS WORDS OF
  • 00:15:06.628 --> 00:15:07.296
  • HE NEEDS WORDS OFAFFIRMATION.
  • 00:15:07.363 --> 00:15:09.031
  • AFFIRMATION.YOU KNOW WHAT SOMETIMES I
  • 00:15:09.098 --> 00:15:09.965
  • YOU KNOW WHAT SOMETIMES IDON'T HAVE VERY MUCH OF AT
  • 00:15:10.032 --> 00:15:10.799
  • DON'T HAVE VERY MUCH OF ATTHE END OF THE DAY, SOME
  • 00:15:10.866 --> 00:15:11.767
  • THE END OF THE DAY, SOMENICE WORDS, I JUST NEED TO
  • 00:15:11.834 --> 00:15:12.735
  • NICE WORDS, I JUST NEED TOGET SOME STUFF DONE AND
  • 00:15:12.801 --> 00:15:13.836
  • GET SOME STUFF DONE ANDGET THE KIDS WHERE THEY
  • 00:15:13.902 --> 00:15:14.803
  • GET THE KIDS WHERE THEYNEED TO BE AND ALL THE
  • 00:15:14.870 --> 00:15:15.838
  • NEED TO BE AND ALL THETHINGS.
  • 00:15:15.904 --> 00:15:16.405
  • THINGS.I HAVE TO REMEMBER THAT
  • 00:15:16.472 --> 00:15:17.740
  • I HAVE TO REMEMBER THATTHIS IS HOW HE FEELS LOVE.
  • 00:15:17.806 --> 00:15:19.808
  • THIS IS HOW HE FEELS LOVE.I THINK EVEN INVESTING IN
  • 00:15:19.875 --> 00:15:22.678
  • I THINK EVEN INVESTING INYOUR MARRIAGE, LIKE YOU
  • 00:15:22.745 --> 00:15:23.746
  • YOUR MARRIAGE, LIKE YOUSAID, LEARNING YOUR SPOUSE
  • 00:15:23.812 --> 00:15:24.713
  • SAID, LEARNING YOUR SPOUSEIN THAT KNOWLEDGE, IT
  • 00:15:24.780 --> 00:15:25.781
  • IN THAT KNOWLEDGE, ITFEELS LIKE IT TAKES WORK
  • 00:15:25.848 --> 00:15:28.417
  • FEELS LIKE IT TAKES WORKBUT I THINK IT DOES TAKE
  • 00:15:28.484 --> 00:15:29.284
  • BUT I THINK IT DOES TAKEWORK.
  • 00:15:29.351 --> 00:15:30.619
  • WORK.I THINK MARRIAGE TAKES
  • 00:15:30.686 --> 00:15:31.153
  • I THINK MARRIAGE TAKESWORK AND LOVE TAKES WORK
  • 00:15:31.220 --> 00:15:33.122
  • WORK AND LOVE TAKES WORKAND LOVE IS A CHOICE, LOVE
  • 00:15:33.188 --> 00:15:34.223
  • AND LOVE IS A CHOICE, LOVEIS AN ACTION, ALL THESE
  • 00:15:34.289 --> 00:15:35.257
  • IS AN ACTION, ALL THESETHINGS WE HAVE TO
  • 00:15:35.324 --> 00:15:35.724
  • THINGS WE HAVE TOREMEMBER.
  • 00:15:35.791 --> 00:15:36.258
  • REMEMBER.I LOVE IT WHEN AARON LOVES
  • 00:15:36.325 --> 00:15:37.526
  • I LOVE IT WHEN AARON LOVESME THE WAY I LIKE TO BE
  • 00:15:37.593 --> 00:15:38.861
  • ME THE WAY I LIKE TO BELOVED.
  • 00:15:38.927 --> 00:15:39.294
  • LOVED.IT IS A JOY FOR ME TO LOVE
  • 00:15:39.361 --> 00:15:42.231
  • IT IS A JOY FOR ME TO LOVEHIM THE WAY HE WANTS TO BE
  • 00:15:42.297 --> 00:15:43.399
  • HIM THE WAY HE WANTS TO BELOVED.
  • 00:15:43.465 --> 00:15:44.233
  • LOVED.- LESLIE: THAT'S
  • 00:15:44.299 --> 00:15:45.000
  • - LESLIE: THAT'SBEAUTIFUL.
  • 00:15:45.067 --> 00:15:46.735
  • BEAUTIFUL.- CECE: THAT'S AWESOME.
  • 00:15:46.802 --> 00:15:47.536
  • - CECE: THAT'S AWESOME.- LAURIE: THERE IS A BOOK
  • 00:15:47.603 --> 00:15:48.604
  • - LAURIE: THERE IS A BOOKCALLED THE LOVE LANGUAGES
  • 00:15:48.670 --> 00:15:50.172
  • CALLED THE LOVE LANGUAGESBY DR. GARY CHAPMAN.
  • 00:15:50.239 --> 00:15:51.407
  • BY DR. GARY CHAPMAN.IT HAS BEEN AROUND FOR
  • 00:15:51.473 --> 00:15:52.741
  • IT HAS BEEN AROUND FORALMOST 30 YEARS NOW.
  • 00:15:52.808 --> 00:15:54.009
  • ALMOST 30 YEARS NOW.MATT AND I JUST READ IT IN
  • 00:15:54.076 --> 00:15:56.512
  • MATT AND I JUST READ IT INTHE LAST COUPLE YEARS.
  • 00:15:56.578 --> 00:15:58.981
  • THE LAST COUPLE YEARS.- CECE: YOU'RE AHEAD OF
  • 00:15:59.048 --> 00:15:59.515
  • - CECE: YOU'RE AHEAD OFUS.
  • 00:15:59.581 --> 00:15:59.948
  • US.- LAURIE: LIKE OH, OH,
  • 00:16:00.015 --> 00:16:00.983
  • - LAURIE: LIKE OH, OH,(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:16:01.050 --> 00:16:06.922
  • (LAUGHTER)SO WE TALKED ABOUT THE
  • 00:16:06.989 --> 00:16:07.456
  • SO WE TALKED ABOUT THELOVE LANGUAGES.
  • 00:16:07.523 --> 00:16:08.590
  • LOVE LANGUAGES.- JAMIE: SO THIS IS WHY.
  • 00:16:08.657 --> 00:16:09.558
  • - JAMIE: SO THIS IS WHY.- LAURIE: YEAH, YEAH
  • 00:16:09.625 --> 00:16:10.125
  • - LAURIE: YEAH, YEAHAND THERE'S FIVE OF THEM.
  • 00:16:10.192 --> 00:16:11.627
  • AND THERE'S FIVE OF THEM.ONE IS WORDS OF
  • 00:16:11.693 --> 00:16:12.127
  • ONE IS WORDS OFAFFIRMATION,
  • 00:16:12.194 --> 00:16:13.028
  • AFFIRMATION,QUALITY TIME,
  • 00:16:13.095 --> 00:16:13.862
  • QUALITY TIME,PHYSICAL TOUCH,
  • 00:16:13.929 --> 00:16:14.329
  • PHYSICAL TOUCH,ACTS OF SERVICE AND
  • 00:16:14.396 --> 00:16:14.930
  • ACTS OF SERVICE ANDRECEIVING GIFTS.
  • 00:16:14.997 --> 00:16:16.598
  • RECEIVING GIFTS.SO NORMALLY HE SAID FOR
  • 00:16:16.665 --> 00:16:17.666
  • SO NORMALLY HE SAID FORTEN YEARS HE HAD DONE
  • 00:16:17.733 --> 00:16:19.001
  • TEN YEARS HE HAD DONEMARRIAGE COUNSELING AND
  • 00:16:19.068 --> 00:16:20.169
  • MARRIAGE COUNSELING ANDBASICALLY ALL THE PROBLEMS
  • 00:16:20.235 --> 00:16:21.904
  • BASICALLY ALL THE PROBLEMSBOILED DOWN TO THESE
  • 00:16:21.970 --> 00:16:23.439
  • BOILED DOWN TO THESEQUESTIONS.
  • 00:16:23.505 --> 00:16:26.208
  • QUESTIONS.YOU CAN LOVE SOMEONE AND
  • 00:16:26.275 --> 00:16:26.742
  • YOU CAN LOVE SOMEONE ANDGIVE THEM GIFTS THINKING
  • 00:16:26.809 --> 00:16:28.977
  • GIVE THEM GIFTS THINKINGTHAT IS THEIR LOVE
  • 00:16:29.044 --> 00:16:30.245
  • THAT IS THEIR LOVELANGUAGE AND THAT IS OKAY.
  • 00:16:30.312 --> 00:16:32.047
  • LANGUAGE AND THAT IS OKAY.SOME PEOPLE JUST WANT A
  • 00:16:32.114 --> 00:16:33.182
  • SOME PEOPLE JUST WANT AGOOD, YOU KNOW WHAT?
  • 00:16:33.248 --> 00:16:34.149
  • GOOD, YOU KNOW WHAT?I'M SORRY.
  • 00:16:34.216 --> 00:16:34.950
  • I'M SORRY.AND I THINK YOU'RE A GREAT
  • 00:16:35.017 --> 00:16:36.952
  • AND I THINK YOU'RE A GREATWIFE.
  • 00:16:37.019 --> 00:16:38.353
  • WIFE.SO, SOMETIMES I THINK WE
  • 00:16:38.420 --> 00:16:40.189
  • SO, SOMETIMES I THINK WEARE SPEAKING THE WRONG
  • 00:16:40.255 --> 00:16:41.190
  • ARE SPEAKING THE WRONGLANGUAGE TO EACH OTHER.
  • 00:16:41.256 --> 00:16:42.291
  • LANGUAGE TO EACH OTHER.MATT'S IS PROBABLY QUALITY
  • 00:16:42.357 --> 00:16:44.059
  • MATT'S IS PROBABLY QUALITYTIME, BESIDES PHYSICAL
  • 00:16:44.126 --> 00:16:44.526
  • TIME, BESIDES PHYSICALTOUCH.
  • 00:16:44.593 --> 00:16:46.061
  • TOUCH.I THINK PHYSICAL TOUCH IS
  • 00:16:46.128 --> 00:16:46.728
  • I THINK PHYSICAL TOUCH ISPROBABLY EVERY MALE'S
  • 00:16:46.795 --> 00:16:48.363
  • PROBABLY EVERY MALE'SNUMBER ONE LOVE LANGUAGE.
  • 00:16:48.430 --> 00:16:49.231
  • NUMBER ONE LOVE LANGUAGE.- CECE: MOST OF THEM,
  • 00:16:49.298 --> 00:16:49.898
  • - CECE: MOST OF THEM,ANYWAY.
  • 00:16:49.965 --> 00:16:50.466
  • ANYWAY.(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:16:50.532 --> 00:16:54.903
  • (LAUGHTER)- LAURIE: BUT THEN HIS IS
  • 00:16:54.970 --> 00:16:55.737
  • - LAURIE: BUT THEN HIS ISQUALITY TIME.
  • 00:16:55.804 --> 00:16:57.172
  • QUALITY TIME.AND I PROBABLY DIDN'T KNOW
  • 00:16:57.239 --> 00:16:57.806
  • AND I PROBABLY DIDN'T KNOWTHAT.
  • 00:16:57.873 --> 00:16:59.341
  • THAT.BECAUSE WE'RE TOGETHER SO
  • 00:16:59.408 --> 00:17:00.275
  • BECAUSE WE'RE TOGETHER SOMUCH OF THE TIME.
  • 00:17:00.342 --> 00:17:02.978
  • MUCH OF THE TIME.WE'RE ALWAYS TOGETHER.
  • 00:17:03.045 --> 00:17:05.314
  • WE'RE ALWAYS TOGETHER.SO I WOULDN'T THINK THAT.
  • 00:17:05.380 --> 00:17:07.349
  • SO I WOULDN'T THINK THAT.I WOULD PROBABLY ALMOST
  • 00:17:07.416 --> 00:17:08.851
  • I WOULD PROBABLY ALMOSTSAY THAT LETTING HIM GO
  • 00:17:08.917 --> 00:17:11.386
  • SAY THAT LETTING HIM GOHANG OUT WITH THE GUYS FOR
  • 00:17:11.453 --> 00:17:12.287
  • HANG OUT WITH THE GUYS FORAWHILE WOULD BE GOOD FOR
  • 00:17:12.354 --> 00:17:13.322
  • AWHILE WOULD BE GOOD FORHIM.
  • 00:17:13.388 --> 00:17:16.058
  • HIM.NOT THINKING OF MYSELF, OF
  • 00:17:16.125 --> 00:17:17.025
  • NOT THINKING OF MYSELF, OFCOURSE, BUT OF HIM TO GET
  • 00:17:17.092 --> 00:17:18.794
  • COURSE, BUT OF HIM TO GETAWAY FOR A MINUTE.
  • 00:17:18.861 --> 00:17:20.028
  • AWAY FOR A MINUTE.BUT HE WANTS TO BE
  • 00:17:20.095 --> 00:17:21.196
  • BUT HE WANTS TO BETOGETHER.
  • 00:17:21.263 --> 00:17:22.131
  • TOGETHER.HE LIKES THAT QUALITY TIME
  • 00:17:22.197 --> 00:17:23.232
  • HE LIKES THAT QUALITY TIMETOGETHER.
  • 00:17:23.298 --> 00:17:24.199
  • TOGETHER.AND I THINK IF WE JUST
  • 00:17:24.266 --> 00:17:25.367
  • AND I THINK IF WE JUSTLEARN HOW TO TALK THEIR
  • 00:17:25.434 --> 00:17:27.302
  • LEARN HOW TO TALK THEIRLANGUAGE INSTEAD OF
  • 00:17:27.369 --> 00:17:28.537
  • LANGUAGE INSTEAD OFTALKING TO THEM IN OUR
  • 00:17:28.604 --> 00:17:30.506
  • TALKING TO THEM IN OURLANGUAGE, MY WORDS OF
  • 00:17:30.572 --> 00:17:31.874
  • LANGUAGE, MY WORDS OFAFFIRMATION TO MATT, HE
  • 00:17:31.940 --> 00:17:32.474
  • AFFIRMATION TO MATT, HEDOESN'T NEED THEM.
  • 00:17:32.541 --> 00:17:35.410
  • DOESN'T NEED THEM.HE'S FINE WITHOUT ME
  • 00:17:35.477 --> 00:17:36.979
  • HE'S FINE WITHOUT METELLING HIM HOW GREAT HE
  • 00:17:37.045 --> 00:17:37.679
  • TELLING HIM HOW GREAT HEIS OR HOW GOOD HE IS AT
  • 00:17:37.746 --> 00:17:38.547
  • IS OR HOW GOOD HE IS ATSOMETHING.
  • 00:17:38.614 --> 00:17:39.047
  • SOMETHING.HE KNOWS IT AND DON'T
  • 00:17:39.114 --> 00:17:41.683
  • HE KNOWS IT AND DON'TWASTE YOUR BREATH.
  • 00:17:41.750 --> 00:17:44.653
  • WASTE YOUR BREATH.(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:17:44.720 --> 00:17:45.487
  • (LAUGHTER)THERE'S SO MANY GOOD
  • 00:17:45.554 --> 00:17:46.255
  • THERE'S SO MANY GOODBOOKS.
  • 00:17:46.321 --> 00:17:47.289
  • BOOKS.LESLEY, YOUR GUYS' BOOK ON
  • 00:17:47.356 --> 00:17:48.657
  • LESLEY, YOUR GUYS' BOOK ONMARRIAGE,
  • 00:17:48.724 --> 00:17:49.258
  • MARRIAGE,"SAVING YOUR MARRIAGE
  • 00:17:49.324 --> 00:17:50.392
  • "SAVING YOUR MARRIAGEBEFORE IT STARTS,"
  • 00:17:50.459 --> 00:17:51.894
  • BEFORE IT STARTS,"I ENCOURAGE ANYBODY
  • 00:17:51.960 --> 00:17:54.763
  • I ENCOURAGE ANYBODYTO GET THAT AND READ IT.
  • 00:17:54.830 --> 00:17:56.265
  • TO GET THAT AND READ IT.EVEN AFTER YOU ARE MARRIED.
  • 00:17:56.331 --> 00:17:57.966
  • EVEN AFTER YOU ARE MARRIED.THERE'S BEAUTIFUL BOOKS.
  • 00:17:58.033 --> 00:17:59.468
  • THERE'S BEAUTIFUL BOOKS.SO MUCH GOOD CONTENT FROM
  • 00:17:59.535 --> 00:18:00.903
  • SO MUCH GOOD CONTENT FROMSO MANY GOOD PEOPLE.
  • 00:18:00.969 --> 00:18:03.105
  • SO MANY GOOD PEOPLE.- LESLIE: A APPRECIATE
  • 00:18:03.172 --> 00:18:03.639
  • - LESLIE: A APPRECIATETHAT, LAURIE.
  • 00:18:03.705 --> 00:18:05.240
  • THAT, LAURIE.THE MAIN THING IS,
  • 00:18:05.307 --> 00:18:06.375
  • THE MAIN THING IS,EVERYTHING WE DO, WHETHER
  • 00:18:06.441 --> 00:18:09.011
  • EVERYTHING WE DO, WHETHERIT'S GARY CHAPMAN'S BOOK,
  • 00:18:09.077 --> 00:18:10.812
  • IT'S GARY CHAPMAN'S BOOK,WHICH WE ABSOLUTELY LOVE.
  • 00:18:10.879 --> 00:18:11.480
  • WHICH WE ABSOLUTELY LOVE.HE IS AN AMAZING GUY.
  • 00:18:11.547 --> 00:18:13.282
  • HE IS AN AMAZING GUY.WHETHER IT'S "SAVING YOUR
  • 00:18:13.348 --> 00:18:15.217
  • WHETHER IT'S "SAVING YOURMARRIAGE BEFORE IT STARTS,"
  • 00:18:15.284 --> 00:18:17.052
  • MARRIAGE BEFORE IT STARTS,"THERE'S SO MANY GOOD
  • 00:18:17.119 --> 00:18:18.020
  • THERE'S SO MANY GOODBOOKS, BUT SEEK THE
  • 00:18:18.086 --> 00:18:19.087
  • BOOKS, BUT SEEK THEKNOWLEDGE AND THE
  • 00:18:19.154 --> 00:18:21.223
  • KNOWLEDGE AND THEDISCERNMENT AND THE INSIGHT.
  • 00:18:21.290 --> 00:18:23.292
  • DISCERNMENT AND THE INSIGHT.AND WE DO KNOW IT MAKES A
  • 00:18:23.358 --> 00:18:24.526
  • AND WE DO KNOW IT MAKES AHUGE DIFFERENCE BECAUSE
  • 00:18:24.593 --> 00:18:25.794
  • HUGE DIFFERENCE BECAUSEYOU START TO REALIZE, THIS
  • 00:18:25.861 --> 00:18:26.361
  • YOU START TO REALIZE, THISISN'T OUR PERSONAL
  • 00:18:26.428 --> 00:18:28.997
  • ISN'T OUR PERSONALPROBLEM.
  • 00:18:29.064 --> 00:18:29.498
  • PROBLEM.THIS IS A RELATIONSHIP
  • 00:18:29.565 --> 00:18:33.202
  • THIS IS A RELATIONSHIPDYNAMIC THAT EVERYBODY
  • 00:18:33.268 --> 00:18:33.702
  • DYNAMIC THAT EVERYBODYNAVIGATES,
  • 00:18:33.769 --> 00:18:34.803
  • NAVIGATES,THERE IS NOT SOMETHING
  • 00:18:34.870 --> 00:18:35.971
  • THERE IS NOT SOMETHINGWRONG WITH US.
  • 00:18:36.038 --> 00:18:36.438
  • WRONG WITH US.WE CAN GROW.
  • 00:18:36.505 --> 00:18:37.606
  • WE CAN GROW.IT OPENS A WINDOW OF GRACE
  • 00:18:37.673 --> 00:18:39.641
  • IT OPENS A WINDOW OF GRACEAND IF GIVES YOU FRESH
  • 00:18:39.708 --> 00:18:41.043
  • AND IF GIVES YOU FRESHINSIGHT, FRESH TOOLS, A
  • 00:18:41.109 --> 00:18:43.011
  • INSIGHT, FRESH TOOLS, ABETTER SENSE OF HUMOR AND
  • 00:18:43.078 --> 00:18:45.113
  • BETTER SENSE OF HUMOR ANDIT DOES CHANGE MARRIAGES
  • 00:18:45.180 --> 00:18:46.348
  • IT DOES CHANGE MARRIAGESTO LEARN.
  • 00:18:46.415 --> 00:18:48.750
  • TO LEARN.- CECE: RIGHT.
  • 00:18:48.817 --> 00:18:49.251
  • - CECE: RIGHT.I THINK THAT IS AWESOME,
  • 00:18:49.318 --> 00:18:50.419
  • I THINK THAT IS AWESOME,DR. LESLIE, ENCOURAGING
  • 00:18:50.485 --> 00:18:52.788
  • DR. LESLIE, ENCOURAGINGCOUPLES TO INVEST IN THEIR
  • 00:18:52.854 --> 00:18:53.355
  • COUPLES TO INVEST IN THEIRMARRIAGE.
  • 00:18:53.422 --> 00:18:54.590
  • MARRIAGE.WE INVEST IN EVERYTHING
  • 00:18:54.656 --> 00:18:56.959
  • WE INVEST IN EVERYTHINGELSE AND WE JUST THINK
  • 00:18:57.025 --> 00:18:58.527
  • ELSE AND WE JUST THINKWE'RE GONNA GET THIS THING
  • 00:18:58.594 --> 00:18:59.094
  • WE'RE GONNA GET THIS THINGRIGHT WITHOUT HELP.
  • 00:18:59.161 --> 00:19:00.529
  • RIGHT WITHOUT HELP.AND IT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN.
  • 00:19:00.596 --> 00:19:01.797
  • AND IT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN.(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:19:01.863 --> 00:19:04.199
  • (LAUGHTER)BUT GET THE BOOKS, GO TO
  • 00:19:04.266 --> 00:19:05.701
  • BUT GET THE BOOKS, GO TOTHE CONFERENCES.
  • 00:19:05.767 --> 00:19:06.902
  • THE CONFERENCES.HAVE MENTORS IN YOUR LIFE.
  • 00:19:06.969 --> 00:19:08.570
  • HAVE MENTORS IN YOUR LIFE.I REMEMBER GOING TO OUR
  • 00:19:08.637 --> 00:19:10.072
  • I REMEMBER GOING TO OURFIRST MARRIAGE CONFERENCE.
  • 00:19:10.138 --> 00:19:11.840
  • FIRST MARRIAGE CONFERENCE.ALVIN AND I HAD BEEN
  • 00:19:11.907 --> 00:19:13.442
  • ALVIN AND I HAD BEENMARRIED I THINK FOR ELEVEN
  • 00:19:13.508 --> 00:19:14.876
  • MARRIED I THINK FOR ELEVENYEARS BEFORE WE WENT TO
  • 00:19:14.943 --> 00:19:15.744
  • YEARS BEFORE WE WENT TOOUR FIRST MARRIAGE
  • 00:19:15.811 --> 00:19:16.812
  • OUR FIRST MARRIAGECONFERENCE.
  • 00:19:16.878 --> 00:19:17.479
  • CONFERENCE.AND GOING INTO THE
  • 00:19:17.546 --> 00:19:18.513
  • AND GOING INTO THECONFERENCE, WE THOUGHT WE
  • 00:19:18.580 --> 00:19:19.548
  • CONFERENCE, WE THOUGHT WEHAD A GOOD MARRIAGE.
  • 00:19:19.615 --> 00:19:20.649
  • HAD A GOOD MARRIAGE.(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:19:20.716 --> 00:19:22.484
  • (LAUGHTER)- LAURIE: OH-OH.
  • 00:19:22.551 --> 00:19:24.553
  • - LAURIE: OH-OH.- CECE: BUT WHEN WE GOT
  • 00:19:24.620 --> 00:19:25.087
  • - CECE: BUT WHEN WE GOTTHERE, WE'RE LIKE, OH, MY GOD.
  • 00:19:25.153 --> 00:19:26.154
  • THERE, WE'RE LIKE, OH, MY GOD.DID I SAY "I DO" TO THAT?
  • 00:19:26.221 --> 00:19:27.022
  • DID I SAY "I DO" TO THAT?YOU KNOW?
  • 00:19:27.089 --> 00:19:28.123
  • YOU KNOW?I WAS LIKE IN SHOCK.
  • 00:19:28.190 --> 00:19:31.627
  • I WAS LIKE IN SHOCK.THEY STARTED TALKING ABOUT
  • 00:19:31.693 --> 00:19:32.194
  • THEY STARTED TALKING ABOUTREAL LOVE.
  • 00:19:32.261 --> 00:19:33.262
  • REAL LOVE.I REMEMBER MY PASTOR TALKING--
  • 00:19:33.328 --> 00:19:36.498
  • I REMEMBER MY PASTOR TALKING--TO THIS DAY, I COULD CRY
  • 00:19:36.565 --> 00:19:38.000
  • TO THIS DAY, I COULD CRYFROM THIS PARTICULAR STATEMENT.
  • 00:19:38.066 --> 00:19:39.935
  • FROM THIS PARTICULAR STATEMENT.HE WAS SAYING THAT IF HIS
  • 00:19:40.002 --> 00:19:45.040
  • HE WAS SAYING THAT IF HISWIFE HAD LEFT HIM, GOD
  • 00:19:45.107 --> 00:19:46.942
  • WIFE HAD LEFT HIM, GODFORBID IF SHE WAS TO EVER
  • 00:19:47.009 --> 00:19:48.277
  • FORBID IF SHE WAS TO EVERLEAVE HIM, BUT HE SAID, IF
  • 00:19:48.343 --> 00:19:50.379
  • LEAVE HIM, BUT HE SAID, IFSHE LEFT ME AND DECIDED TO
  • 00:19:50.445 --> 00:19:52.648
  • SHE LEFT ME AND DECIDED TOSELL HER BODY, HE SAID, I
  • 00:19:52.714 --> 00:19:55.784
  • SELL HER BODY, HE SAID, IWOULD GO AND SPEND ALL MY
  • 00:19:55.851 --> 00:19:57.386
  • WOULD GO AND SPEND ALL MYMONEY BUYING UP ALL HER
  • 00:19:57.452 --> 00:19:58.353
  • MONEY BUYING UP ALL HERTIME.
  • 00:19:58.420 --> 00:20:00.989
  • TIME.BECAUSE HER SOUL WAS MORE
  • 00:20:01.056 --> 00:20:02.557
  • BECAUSE HER SOUL WAS MOREIMPORTANT THAN HIS FLESH.
  • 00:20:02.624 --> 00:20:04.726
  • IMPORTANT THAN HIS FLESH.HER SOUL WAS MORE
  • 00:20:04.793 --> 00:20:06.695
  • HER SOUL WAS MOREIMPORTANT THAN HIS--
  • 00:20:06.762 --> 00:20:08.597
  • IMPORTANT THAN HIS--WHAT HE WAS GOING THROUGH.
  • 00:20:08.664 --> 00:20:15.537
  • WHAT HE WAS GOING THROUGH.I'LL NEVER FORGET THAT.
  • 00:20:15.604 --> 00:20:16.271
  • I'LL NEVER FORGET THAT.HE WAS WEEPING.
  • 00:20:16.338 --> 00:20:17.072
  • HE WAS WEEPING.IT WAS JUST LIKE THAT IS
  • 00:20:17.139 --> 00:20:17.606
  • IT WAS JUST LIKE THAT ISHOW YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO
  • 00:20:17.673 --> 00:20:18.707
  • HOW YOU ARE SUPPOSED TOLOVE YOUR MATE.
  • 00:20:18.774 --> 00:20:20.008
  • LOVE YOUR MATE.AT THAT TIME I JUST SAID,
  • 00:20:20.075 --> 00:20:20.575
  • AT THAT TIME I JUST SAID,WELL, I AM JUST NOT THERE
  • 00:20:20.642 --> 00:20:21.610
  • WELL, I AM JUST NOT THEREYET.
  • 00:20:21.677 --> 00:20:23.211
  • YET.LORD HELP ME.
  • 00:20:23.278 --> 00:20:24.346
  • LORD HELP ME.BUT I LEFT OUT OF THERE
  • 00:20:24.413 --> 00:20:26.481
  • BUT I LEFT OUT OF THERESAYING, MY HUSBAND AND I
  • 00:20:26.548 --> 00:20:28.050
  • SAYING, MY HUSBAND AND ISAYING, WE'RE SO GLAD WE
  • 00:20:28.116 --> 00:20:29.084
  • SAYING, WE'RE SO GLAD WEWENT.
  • 00:20:29.151 --> 00:20:30.052
  • WENT.AND WE RECEIVED THE TOOLS
  • 00:20:30.118 --> 00:20:32.154
  • AND WE RECEIVED THE TOOLSWE NEEDED TO TAKE OUR
  • 00:20:32.220 --> 00:20:33.889
  • WE NEEDED TO TAKE OURMARRIAGE TO ANOTHER LEVEL.
  • 00:20:33.955 --> 00:20:37.893
  • MARRIAGE TO ANOTHER LEVEL.AND IT IS AMAZING WHEN YOU
  • 00:20:37.959 --> 00:20:38.794
  • AND IT IS AMAZING WHEN YOUSAY, YOU KNOW WHAT, IT IS
  • 00:20:38.860 --> 00:20:39.661
  • SAY, YOU KNOW WHAT, IT ISOKAY TO SAY I DON'T KNOW.
  • 00:20:39.728 --> 00:20:41.463
  • OKAY TO SAY I DON'T KNOW.IT IS OKAY TO SAY, I NEED
  • 00:20:41.530 --> 00:20:42.631
  • IT IS OKAY TO SAY, I NEEDTO DO BETTER.
  • 00:20:42.698 --> 00:20:44.733
  • TO DO BETTER.I DON'T HAVE IT.
  • 00:20:44.800 --> 00:20:45.634
  • I DON'T HAVE IT.AGAIN, WHEN WE ARE HONEST
  • 00:20:45.701 --> 00:20:46.935
  • AGAIN, WHEN WE ARE HONESTWITH GOD AND WE ARE HONEST
  • 00:20:47.002 --> 00:20:47.669
  • WITH GOD AND WE ARE HONESTWITH OUR MATES THAT OPENS
  • 00:20:47.736 --> 00:20:49.838
  • WITH OUR MATES THAT OPENSTHE DOOR AND THE
  • 00:20:49.905 --> 00:20:50.839
  • THE DOOR AND THEOPPORTUNITY TO IMPROVE AND
  • 00:20:50.906 --> 00:20:52.174
  • OPPORTUNITY TO IMPROVE ANDSO YOU CAN HAVE THE BEST
  • 00:20:52.240 --> 00:20:54.443
  • SO YOU CAN HAVE THE BESTMARRIAGE EVER.
  • 00:20:54.509 --> 00:20:56.378
  • MARRIAGE EVER.HAVE THE MARRIAGE THAT GOD
  • 00:20:56.445 --> 00:20:57.446
  • HAVE THE MARRIAGE THAT GODHAS CALLED US TO HAVE.
  • 00:20:57.512 --> 00:20:58.847
  • HAS CALLED US TO HAVE.I THINK IT'S POSSIBLE FOR
  • 00:20:58.914 --> 00:21:00.082
  • I THINK IT'S POSSIBLE FOREVERYBODY.
  • 00:21:00.148 --> 00:21:00.949
  • EVERYBODY.BUT YOU HAVE TO BE WILLING
  • 00:21:01.016 --> 00:21:02.150
  • BUT YOU HAVE TO BE WILLINGTO INVEST IN IT.
  • 00:21:02.217 --> 00:21:02.617
  • TO INVEST IN IT.- HOSANNA: I WANT TO
  • 00:21:02.684 --> 00:21:04.019
  • - HOSANNA: I WANT TOCIRCLE BACK TO SOMETHING
  • 00:21:04.086 --> 00:21:05.053
  • CIRCLE BACK TO SOMETHINGTHAT JAMIE SAID SOMETHING
  • 00:21:05.120 --> 00:21:06.855
  • THAT JAMIE SAID SOMETHINGREALLY POWERFUL EARLIER
  • 00:21:06.922 --> 00:21:08.090
  • REALLY POWERFUL EARLIERWHERE SHE SAID, I HAVE
  • 00:21:08.156 --> 00:21:09.157
  • WHERE SHE SAID, I HAVECOME TO REALIZE THAT IT IS
  • 00:21:09.224 --> 00:21:11.693
  • COME TO REALIZE THAT IT ISMY JOY TO LOVE MY HUSBAND
  • 00:21:11.760 --> 00:21:13.995
  • MY JOY TO LOVE MY HUSBANDWELL AND IT IS HIS JOY TO
  • 00:21:14.062 --> 00:21:15.230
  • WELL AND IT IS HIS JOY TOLOVE ME WELL.
  • 00:21:15.297 --> 00:21:16.531
  • LOVE ME WELL.RIGHT?
  • 00:21:16.598 --> 00:21:17.099
  • RIGHT?IS THAT WHAT YOU SAID,
  • 00:21:17.165 --> 00:21:17.599
  • IS THAT WHAT YOU SAID,JAMIE?
  • 00:21:17.666 --> 00:21:18.834
  • JAMIE?- JAMIE: SOMETHING LIKE
  • 00:21:18.900 --> 00:21:19.334
  • - JAMIE: SOMETHING LIKETHAT.
  • 00:21:19.401 --> 00:21:20.068
  • THAT.THAT SOUNDS GREAT.
  • 00:21:20.135 --> 00:21:20.936
  • THAT SOUNDS GREAT.- HOSANNA: HE WANTS TO
  • 00:21:21.002 --> 00:21:21.503
  • - HOSANNA: HE WANTS TOLOVE YOU WELL.
  • 00:21:21.570 --> 00:21:22.104
  • LOVE YOU WELL.THAT'S GREAT, JAMIE.
  • 00:21:22.170 --> 00:21:23.038
  • THAT'S GREAT, JAMIE.WE ARE CO-WRITING THIS
  • 00:21:23.105 --> 00:21:23.505
  • WE ARE CO-WRITING THISTOGETHER.
  • 00:21:23.572 --> 00:21:26.041
  • TOGETHER.BUT YOU SAID HE WANTS TO
  • 00:21:26.108 --> 00:21:28.143
  • BUT YOU SAID HE WANTS TOLOVE ME WELL AND I WANT TO
  • 00:21:28.210 --> 00:21:29.211
  • LOVE ME WELL AND I WANT TOLOVE HIM WELL.
  • 00:21:29.277 --> 00:21:30.178
  • LOVE HIM WELL.THAT IS SO POWERFUL TO ME
  • 00:21:30.245 --> 00:21:31.847
  • THAT IS SO POWERFUL TO MEBECAUSE IT SHOWS US A TOOL
  • 00:21:31.913 --> 00:21:34.182
  • BECAUSE IT SHOWS US A TOOLFOR US IN OUR MARRIAGES IN
  • 00:21:34.249 --> 00:21:35.650
  • FOR US IN OUR MARRIAGES INOUR DATING RELATIONSHIPS
  • 00:21:35.717 --> 00:21:37.386
  • OUR DATING RELATIONSHIPSOR IN ANY OF OUR
  • 00:21:37.452 --> 00:21:38.220
  • OR IN ANY OF OURRELATIONSHIPS IN ANY OF
  • 00:21:38.286 --> 00:21:39.187
  • RELATIONSHIPS IN ANY OFOUR FRIENDSHIPS, FOR US TO
  • 00:21:39.254 --> 00:21:42.357
  • OUR FRIENDSHIPS, FOR US TOLOVE WELL AND TO BE LOVED WELL
  • 00:21:42.424 --> 00:21:43.592
  • LOVE WELL AND TO BE LOVED WELLIS TO SET EACH OTHER UP
  • 00:21:43.658 --> 00:21:44.126
  • IS TO SET EACH OTHER UPFOR SUCCESS.
  • 00:21:44.192 --> 00:21:44.760
  • FOR SUCCESS.TO SAY, THIS IS WHAT MAKES
  • 00:21:44.826 --> 00:21:46.928
  • TO SAY, THIS IS WHAT MAKESME FEEL LOVED ON THIS
  • 00:21:46.995 --> 00:21:48.730
  • ME FEEL LOVED ON THISHOLIDAY.
  • 00:21:48.797 --> 00:21:49.164
  • HOLIDAY.NOT TO MAKE PEOPLE GO
  • 00:21:49.231 --> 00:21:51.133
  • NOT TO MAKE PEOPLE GOTHROUGH A GUESSING GAME,
  • 00:21:51.199 --> 00:21:51.666
  • THROUGH A GUESSING GAME,LIKE, THIS IS WHAT I WANT
  • 00:21:51.733 --> 00:21:52.868
  • LIKE, THIS IS WHAT I WANTFOR MY BIRTHDAY, HUSBAND.
  • 00:21:52.934 --> 00:21:53.769
  • FOR MY BIRTHDAY, HUSBAND.THIS IS WHAT I WOULD LIKE
  • 00:21:53.835 --> 00:21:55.070
  • THIS IS WHAT I WOULD LIKEFOR VALENTINE'S DAY,
  • 00:21:55.137 --> 00:21:56.438
  • FOR VALENTINE'S DAY,BOYFRIEND.
  • 00:21:56.505 --> 00:21:57.139
  • BOYFRIEND.HEY, FRIENDS, IT IS A BIG
  • 00:21:57.205 --> 00:21:58.740
  • HEY, FRIENDS, IT IS A BIGANNIVERSARY FOR ME.
  • 00:21:58.807 --> 00:21:59.408
  • ANNIVERSARY FOR ME.THIS IS WHAT I WOULD LIKE
  • 00:21:59.474 --> 00:22:00.509
  • THIS IS WHAT I WOULD LIKEUS TO DO.
  • 00:22:00.575 --> 00:22:01.476
  • US TO DO.FOR US TO REALIZE THAT
  • 00:22:01.543 --> 00:22:02.210
  • FOR US TO REALIZE THATPEOPLE WANT TO LOVE US WELL.
  • 00:22:02.277 --> 00:22:04.179
  • PEOPLE WANT TO LOVE US WELL.AND WE CAN SET THEM UP FOR
  • 00:22:04.246 --> 00:22:05.847
  • AND WE CAN SET THEM UP FORSUCCESS.
  • 00:22:05.914 --> 00:22:07.315
  • SUCCESS.NOT MAKE THEM HAVE A
  • 00:22:07.382 --> 00:22:09.017
  • NOT MAKE THEM HAVE AGUESSING GAME BUT REALIZE
  • 00:22:09.084 --> 00:22:10.352
  • GUESSING GAME BUT REALIZEIT IS THEIR JOY TO LOVE US
  • 00:22:10.419 --> 00:22:11.853
  • IT IS THEIR JOY TO LOVE USAND IT IS OUR JOY TO LOVE
  • 00:22:11.920 --> 00:22:12.854
  • AND IT IS OUR JOY TO LOVETHEM SO WE CAN LOVE THEM WELL.
  • 00:22:12.921 --> 00:22:15.056
  • THEM SO WE CAN LOVE THEM WELL.AND SET THEM UP FOR
  • 00:22:15.123 --> 00:22:15.524
  • AND SET THEM UP FORSUCCESS.
  • 00:22:15.590 --> 00:22:16.158
  • SUCCESS.SET THEM UP, LET THEM SPIKE.
  • 00:22:16.224 --> 00:22:17.826
  • SET THEM UP, LET THEM SPIKE.HEY, MY LOVE, DON'T
  • 00:22:17.893 --> 00:22:18.994
  • HEY, MY LOVE, DON'TFORGET, THIS HOLIDAY IS
  • 00:22:19.060 --> 00:22:19.961
  • FORGET, THIS HOLIDAY ISVERY IMPORTANT TO ME.
  • 00:22:20.028 --> 00:22:20.896
  • VERY IMPORTANT TO ME.I'M GONNA SET YOU UP FOR
  • 00:22:20.962 --> 00:22:21.596
  • I'M GONNA SET YOU UP FORSUCCESS.
  • 00:22:21.663 --> 00:22:22.297
  • SUCCESS.THIS IS WHAT I WOULD LIKE.
  • 00:22:22.364 --> 00:22:23.565
  • THIS IS WHAT I WOULD LIKE.AND LET THEM LOVE US WELL.
  • 00:22:23.632 --> 00:22:25.901
  • AND LET THEM LOVE US WELL.THEY WANT TO.
  • 00:22:25.967 --> 00:22:26.868
  • THEY WANT TO.AND WE CAN HELP EACH OTHER
  • 00:22:26.935 --> 00:22:27.402
  • AND WE CAN HELP EACH OTHEROUT.
  • 00:22:27.469 --> 00:22:28.937
  • OUT.- CECE: THAT'S AWESOME.
  • 00:22:29.004 --> 00:22:29.471
  • - CECE: THAT'S AWESOME.THAT IS AWESOME.
  • 00:22:29.538 --> 00:22:30.705
  • THAT IS AWESOME.MY HUSBAND AND I WERE ABLE
  • 00:22:30.772 --> 00:22:31.473
  • MY HUSBAND AND I WERE ABLETO DO A LIFE CLASS FOR
  • 00:22:31.540 --> 00:22:34.376
  • TO DO A LIFE CLASS FORMARRIED COUPLES.
  • 00:22:34.443 --> 00:22:36.545
  • MARRIED COUPLES.AND WE USED JIMMY EVANS--
  • 00:22:36.611 --> 00:22:39.181
  • AND WE USED JIMMY EVANS--HIS STUFF IS SO GOOD.
  • 00:22:39.247 --> 00:22:41.716
  • HIS STUFF IS SO GOOD.ANOTHER GREAT RESOURCE.
  • 00:22:41.783 --> 00:22:42.884
  • ANOTHER GREAT RESOURCE.- LAURIE: STRENGTH BASED
  • 00:22:42.951 --> 00:22:43.685
  • - LAURIE: STRENGTH BASEDMARRIAGES.
  • 00:22:43.752 --> 00:22:45.086
  • MARRIAGES.- CECE: YES.
  • 00:22:45.153 --> 00:22:45.554
  • - CECE: YES.- LAURIE: AMAZING.
  • 00:22:45.620 --> 00:22:46.555
  • - LAURIE: AMAZING.- CECE: AND THIS ONE WAS
  • 00:22:46.621 --> 00:22:47.088
  • - CECE: AND THIS ONE WASMARRIAGE ON THE ROCK.
  • 00:22:47.155 --> 00:22:48.723
  • MARRIAGE ON THE ROCK.IT WAS SO GOOD.
  • 00:22:48.790 --> 00:22:49.424
  • IT WAS SO GOOD.AND GOING BACK TO WHAT
  • 00:22:49.491 --> 00:22:51.993
  • AND GOING BACK TO WHATLAURIE WAS SAYING AND ALSO
  • 00:22:52.060 --> 00:22:52.561
  • LAURIE WAS SAYING AND ALSOHOSANNA WAS SAYING, HE
  • 00:22:52.627 --> 00:22:53.762
  • HOSANNA WAS SAYING, HESUGGESTED YOU COME UP WITH
  • 00:22:53.829 --> 00:22:55.864
  • SUGGESTED YOU COME UP WITHA TIME, A TIME AND MAYBE
  • 00:22:55.931 --> 00:22:57.132
  • A TIME, A TIME AND MAYBEAN HOUR A WEEK.
  • 00:22:57.199 --> 00:23:01.369
  • AN HOUR A WEEK.THAT WAS OUR HOMEWORK.
  • 00:23:01.436 --> 00:23:02.170
  • THAT WAS OUR HOMEWORK.AN HOUR A WEEK.
  • 00:23:02.237 --> 00:23:03.405
  • AN HOUR A WEEK.AND WOMEN, YOU KNOW, WE'RE
  • 00:23:03.472 --> 00:23:04.372
  • AND WOMEN, YOU KNOW, WE'REREADY TO TALK.
  • 00:23:04.439 --> 00:23:05.407
  • READY TO TALK.MY HUSBAND WAS LIKE, HOW
  • 00:23:05.474 --> 00:23:06.308
  • MY HUSBAND WAS LIKE, HOWMUCH TIME DO WE HAVE LEFT?
  • 00:23:06.374 --> 00:23:07.008
  • MUCH TIME DO WE HAVE LEFT?(LAUGHTER)
  • 00:23:07.075 --> 00:23:10.045
  • (LAUGHTER)I'M LIKE, NO HE SAID AN
  • 00:23:10.111 --> 00:23:12.347
  • I'M LIKE, NO HE SAID ANHOUR.
  • 00:23:12.414 --> 00:23:13.448
  • HOUR.BUT IT WORKED SO WELL,
  • 00:23:13.515 --> 00:23:14.149
  • BUT IT WORKED SO WELL,BECAUSE FOR THE MOST PART
  • 00:23:14.216 --> 00:23:17.018
  • BECAUSE FOR THE MOST PARTWE WANT TO TALK ALL THE
  • 00:23:17.085 --> 00:23:18.220
  • WE WANT TO TALK ALL THETIME AS WOMEN AND FOR THE
  • 00:23:18.286 --> 00:23:19.154
  • TIME AS WOMEN AND FOR THEMOST PART-- AND
  • 00:23:19.221 --> 00:23:20.055
  • MOST PART-- ANDEVERYBODY'S NOT THE SAME,
  • 00:23:20.121 --> 00:23:20.856
  • EVERYBODY'S NOT THE SAME,SO I DON'T WANT TO PUT ALL
  • 00:23:20.922 --> 00:23:22.691
  • SO I DON'T WANT TO PUT ALLTHE WOMEN IN ONE CATEGORY
  • 00:23:22.757 --> 00:23:23.525
  • THE WOMEN IN ONE CATEGORYAND ALL THE MEN IN ONE
  • 00:23:23.592 --> 00:23:24.192
  • AND ALL THE MEN IN ONECATEGORY, BUT MOST OF THE
  • 00:23:24.259 --> 00:23:25.760
  • CATEGORY, BUT MOST OF THETIME THEY ARE NOT THE ONES
  • 00:23:25.827 --> 00:23:26.862
  • TIME THEY ARE NOT THE ONESWHO WANT TO TALK A LOT.
  • 00:23:26.928 --> 00:23:27.929
  • WHO WANT TO TALK A LOT.BUT HE WAS JUST SAYING,
  • 00:23:27.996 --> 00:23:29.297
  • BUT HE WAS JUST SAYING,COME UP WITH THAT TIME
  • 00:23:29.364 --> 00:23:31.800
  • COME UP WITH THAT TIMETHAT YOU BOTH CAN SIT DOWN
  • 00:23:31.867 --> 00:23:33.068
  • THAT YOU BOTH CAN SIT DOWNAND PRAY AND REALLY ASK
  • 00:23:33.134 --> 00:23:34.402
  • AND PRAY AND REALLY ASKDIFFERENT THINGS ABOUT HOW
  • 00:23:34.469 --> 00:23:35.237
  • DIFFERENT THINGS ABOUT HOWYOU CAN LOVE ONE ANOTHER
  • 00:23:35.303 --> 00:23:36.638
  • YOU CAN LOVE ONE ANOTHERBETTER.
  • 00:23:36.705 --> 00:23:38.406
  • BETTER.AND THEN, NO ONE REALLY
  • 00:23:38.473 --> 00:23:39.608
  • AND THEN, NO ONE REALLYFEELS ATTACKED.
  • 00:23:39.674 --> 00:23:41.009
  • FEELS ATTACKED.WHAT DO YOU FEEL ABOUT
  • 00:23:41.076 --> 00:23:41.743
  • WHAT DO YOU FEEL ABOUTTHAT, DR. LESLIE, BEFORE
  • 00:23:41.810 --> 00:23:42.277
  • THAT, DR. LESLIE, BEFOREWE PRAY?
  • 00:23:42.344 --> 00:23:43.645
  • WE PRAY?- LESLIE: I LOVE THAT.
  • 00:23:43.712 --> 00:23:44.179
  • - LESLIE: I LOVE THAT.WE HAVE A SIMPLE THING WE
  • 00:23:44.246 --> 00:23:45.313
  • WE HAVE A SIMPLE THING WEDO IN OUR MARRIAGE WHERE
  • 00:23:45.380 --> 00:23:46.448
  • DO IN OUR MARRIAGE WHEREWE JUST CALL IT THE BIG
  • 00:23:46.515 --> 00:23:47.616
  • WE JUST CALL IT THE BIGQUESTION.
  • 00:23:47.682 --> 00:23:48.850
  • QUESTION.AND IT IS JUST WHERE YOU
  • 00:23:48.917 --> 00:23:50.552
  • AND IT IS JUST WHERE YOUSIT DOWN AND ASK EACH
  • 00:23:50.619 --> 00:23:52.854
  • SIT DOWN AND ASK EACHOTHER, WHAT IS ONE THING I
  • 00:23:52.921 --> 00:23:53.788
  • OTHER, WHAT IS ONE THING ICOULD DO TODAY OR THIS
  • 00:23:53.855 --> 00:23:54.289
  • COULD DO TODAY OR THISWEEK TO BE A BETTER
  • 00:23:54.356 --> 00:23:57.492
  • WEEK TO BE A BETTERHUSBAND OR A BETTER WIFE?
  • 00:23:57.559 --> 00:23:58.393
  • HUSBAND OR A BETTER WIFE?JUST ONE THING?
  • 00:23:58.460 --> 00:24:00.195
  • JUST ONE THING?I'M GONNA TELL YOU, THAT
  • 00:24:00.262 --> 00:24:01.396
  • I'M GONNA TELL YOU, THATIS REALLY LIFE-GIVING.
  • 00:24:01.463 --> 00:24:04.099
  • IS REALLY LIFE-GIVING.BECAUSE FIRST OF ALL YOU
  • 00:24:04.165 --> 00:24:05.800
  • BECAUSE FIRST OF ALL YOUARE NOT OVERWHELMED WITH
  • 00:24:05.867 --> 00:24:07.302
  • ARE NOT OVERWHELMED WITHEVERYTHING BUT IT ALSO
  • 00:24:07.369 --> 00:24:08.503
  • EVERYTHING BUT IT ALSOGIVES YOU, JUST LIKE
  • 00:24:08.570 --> 00:24:10.138
  • GIVES YOU, JUST LIKEHOSANNA SAID, A WAY TO
  • 00:24:10.205 --> 00:24:12.774
  • HOSANNA SAID, A WAY TOSPIKE IT AND LOVE WELL IN
  • 00:24:12.841 --> 00:24:13.808
  • SPIKE IT AND LOVE WELL INTHAT MOMENT.
  • 00:24:13.875 --> 00:24:15.243
  • THAT MOMENT.AND SO, IT'S A SIMPLE
  • 00:24:15.310 --> 00:24:16.344
  • AND SO, IT'S A SIMPLETHING, BUT IT WORKS SOME
  • 00:24:16.411 --> 00:24:17.445
  • THING, BUT IT WORKS SOMEMAGIC.
  • 00:24:17.512 --> 00:24:19.514
  • MAGIC.- CECE: AWESOME.
  • 00:24:19.581 --> 00:24:21.416
  • - CECE: AWESOME.SO WE'RE JUST GONNA PRAY
  • 00:24:21.483 --> 00:24:23.485
  • SO WE'RE JUST GONNA PRAYFOR THOSE WHO ARE WATCHING
  • 00:24:23.552 --> 00:24:25.654
  • FOR THOSE WHO ARE WATCHINGRIGHT NOW, GOD IS SO
  • 00:24:25.720 --> 00:24:26.254
  • RIGHT NOW, GOD IS SOFAITHFUL, SO TRUE.
  • 00:24:26.321 --> 00:24:28.490
  • FAITHFUL, SO TRUE.WE DON'T HAVE TO LOOK FAR
  • 00:24:28.557 --> 00:24:29.758
  • WE DON'T HAVE TO LOOK FARTO LEARN HOW TO LOVE.
  • 00:24:29.824 --> 00:24:31.326
  • TO LEARN HOW TO LOVE.GOD TAUGHT US.
  • 00:24:31.393 --> 00:24:31.860
  • GOD TAUGHT US.HE SO LOVED THE WORLD THAT
  • 00:24:31.927 --> 00:24:33.528
  • HE SO LOVED THE WORLD THATHE GAVE HIS ONLY BEGOTTEN
  • 00:24:33.595 --> 00:24:34.429
  • HE GAVE HIS ONLY BEGOTTENSON.
  • 00:24:34.496 --> 00:24:34.963
  • SON.SO FATHER, GOD, WE THANK
  • 00:24:35.030 --> 00:24:37.465
  • SO FATHER, GOD, WE THANKYOU NOW FOR YOU BEING LOVE,
  • 00:24:37.532 --> 00:24:40.335
  • YOU NOW FOR YOU BEING LOVE,LORD, AND FOR YOU
  • 00:24:40.402 --> 00:24:41.903
  • LORD, AND FOR YOUGIVING US THE EXAMPLE THAT
  • 00:24:41.970 --> 00:24:45.240
  • GIVING US THE EXAMPLE THATWE ALL NEED IN ORDER TO
  • 00:24:45.307 --> 00:24:45.774
  • WE ALL NEED IN ORDER TOLOVE WELL, GOD.
  • 00:24:45.840 --> 00:24:47.442
  • LOVE WELL, GOD.I PRAY FOR EVERY MARRIED
  • 00:24:47.509 --> 00:24:47.976
  • I PRAY FOR EVERY MARRIEDPERSON WATCHING TODAY.
  • 00:24:48.043 --> 00:24:49.778
  • PERSON WATCHING TODAY.I PRAY FOR EVERY MARRIAGE,
  • 00:24:49.844 --> 00:24:51.413
  • I PRAY FOR EVERY MARRIAGE,LORD, THAT YOU WOULD
  • 00:24:51.479 --> 00:24:52.213
  • LORD, THAT YOU WOULDSTRENGTHEN US AND YOU
  • 00:24:52.280 --> 00:24:54.349
  • STRENGTHEN US AND YOUWOULD TEACH US, LORD, HOW
  • 00:24:54.416 --> 00:24:56.284
  • WOULD TEACH US, LORD, HOWTO LOVE ONE ANOTHER WELL.
  • 00:24:56.351 --> 00:24:57.385
  • TO LOVE ONE ANOTHER WELL.FATHER, GOD, YOU ARE SO
  • 00:24:57.452 --> 00:24:58.753
  • FATHER, GOD, YOU ARE SOGOOD.
  • 00:24:58.820 --> 00:25:00.121
  • GOOD.I PRAY THAT OUR MARRIAGES
  • 00:25:00.188 --> 00:25:01.623
  • I PRAY THAT OUR MARRIAGESWOULD BE STRONGER THAN
  • 00:25:01.690 --> 00:25:02.724
  • WOULD BE STRONGER THANEVER AND THAT WE WOULD
  • 00:25:02.791 --> 00:25:03.858
  • EVER AND THAT WE WOULDWALK IN HUMILITY, LORD,
  • 00:25:03.925 --> 00:25:05.460
  • WALK IN HUMILITY, LORD,AND GET A JOY, JOY OUT OF
  • 00:25:05.527 --> 00:25:07.596
  • AND GET A JOY, JOY OUT OFSERVING ONE ANOTHER AND
  • 00:25:07.662 --> 00:25:10.131
  • SERVING ONE ANOTHER ANDLOVING ONE ANOTHER THE WAY
  • 00:25:10.198 --> 00:25:11.232
  • LOVING ONE ANOTHER THE WAYYOU HAVE LOVED US.
  • 00:25:11.299 --> 00:25:12.500
  • YOU HAVE LOVED US.AND WE THANK YOU, LORD,
  • 00:25:12.567 --> 00:25:14.102
  • AND WE THANK YOU, LORD,FOR DOING THIS IN OUR
  • 00:25:14.169 --> 00:25:15.870
  • FOR DOING THIS IN OURHEARTS AND OUR MARRIAGES
  • 00:25:15.937 --> 00:25:16.972
  • HEARTS AND OUR MARRIAGESAND ALL THOSE WHO ARE
  • 00:25:17.038 --> 00:25:18.073
  • AND ALL THOSE WHO AREWATCHING IN JESUS' NAME WE
  • 00:25:18.139 --> 00:25:19.641
  • WATCHING IN JESUS' NAME WEPRAY, AMEN.
  • 00:25:19.708 --> 00:25:20.942
  • PRAY, AMEN.- LAURIE: AMEN.
  • 00:25:21.009 --> 00:25:23.912
  • - LAURIE: AMEN.WE WANT TO KNOW WHAT'S ON
  • 00:25:23.979 --> 00:25:24.646
  • WE WANT TO KNOW WHAT'S ONYOUR HEART.
  • 00:25:24.713 --> 00:25:25.080
  • YOUR HEART.IS THERE SOMEONE OR
  • 00:25:25.146 --> 00:25:26.448
  • IS THERE SOMEONE ORSOMETHING YOU WOULD LIKE
  • 00:25:26.514 --> 00:25:27.782
  • SOMETHING YOU WOULD LIKEFOR US TO PRAY FOR?
  • 00:25:27.849 --> 00:25:29.317
  • FOR US TO PRAY FOR?LET US KNOW HOW WE CAN
  • 00:25:29.384 --> 00:25:29.818
  • LET US KNOW HOW WE CANSTAND WITH YOU BY
  • 00:25:29.884 --> 00:25:30.518
  • STAND WITH YOU BYCONNECTING WITH US ON
  • 00:25:30.585 --> 00:25:31.019
  • CONNECTING WITH US ONSOCIAL MEDIA.
  • 00:25:31.086 --> 00:25:31.886
  • SOCIAL MEDIA.THANK YOU FOR JOINING US
  • 00:25:31.953 --> 00:25:33.088
  • THANK YOU FOR JOINING USTODAY.
  • 00:25:33.154 --> 00:25:33.788
  • TODAY.TOMORROW, WE ARE LEARNING
  • 00:25:33.855 --> 00:25:34.923
  • TOMORROW, WE ARE LEARNINGHOW TO SET BOUNDARIES IN
  • 00:25:34.990 --> 00:25:36.591
  • HOW TO SET BOUNDARIES INMARRIAGE, HEALTHY
  • 00:25:36.658 --> 00:25:37.726
  • MARRIAGE, HEALTHYSELF-CARE CAN MAKE WERE
  • 00:25:37.792 --> 00:25:39.461
  • SELF-CARE CAN MAKE WEREYOUR RELATIONSHIP
  • 00:25:39.527 --> 00:25:39.995
  • YOUR RELATIONSHIPSTRONGER.
  • 00:25:40.061 --> 00:25:40.629
  • STRONGER.WE WILL SEE YOU TOMORROW.
  • 00:25:40.695 --> 00:25:41.196
  • WE WILL SEE YOU TOMORROW.GOD BLESS YOU.
  • 00:25:41.262 --> 00:25:41.630
  • GOD BLESS YOU.BYE-BYE!
  • 00:25:41.696 --> 00:25:43.598
  • BYE-BYE!♪ MUSIC ♪
  • 00:25:43.665 --> 00:25:46.434